Bimillenial Facepalm – 11.2.1

In Facepalm by berselius105 Comments

Cubs "losing" a bunch of players to free agency/waivers

Team MVP Shawn Camp was the only officially official free agent on the roster, but a few other players have opted for free agency after being kicked off the Cubs 40-man roster. Apparently they don't realize that "cut from the Cubs roster" is not going to be a net positive for them in future negotiations. 

So far, the team has "lost" the following players to free agency/other organizations

As Aisley pointed out, given Mather's -1.5 fWAR last year he's probably going to have to pay some team $15m to play for them next year (laughing)

Brenly Replacement Search Continues

Dan Plesac has joined Eric Karros as a candidate for the position. Please, no Plesac. I'm really hoping to hear that Doug Glanville is actually being considered, rather than just being wishcast by various fans. 

Thoyer Conference call with season ticket holders

Brett has a paraphrased transcript over at Bleacher Nation. Nothing too earth-shattering there. They admit that they inherited some really shitty pitching depth and mentioned that they're not planning to bullpen Arodys Vizcaino, which is great news. They also said they're not interested in doing any deals like the Cubs did with Carlos Pena that defers a huge chunk of money. But there's no real reason for them to do that right now anyway because they have so little payroll.

Javier Baez Update

Baez broke the tip of his left thumb, but it was a non-displaced fracture so it sounds like it's relatively not a big deal. It will end his AFL season, however. Logan Watkins was given his spot for the rest of the league's short season.

 

Cubs float a balloon about bringing back Ryan Dempster

In that same article, Carrie Muskat mentioned that Hoyer has been in contact with Dempster's agent. Hoyer was quick to down-play this, and said it was more of a "I bumped into him" kind of situation. Though it's hard to accidentally bump into someone when you pick up your phone and call them. Maybe he and Demp's agent were just discussing candlesticks as wedding gifts for a mutual friend of theirs.

Vague trade rumor of the moment

Bruce Levine mentioned last week that the salary-dumping Marlins have approached the Cubs about trading Josh Johnson. If (almost) all he costs is money, it's something I think that Thoyer would be interested in. He turns 29 in January, but has surprisingly little mileage on his arm. Of course, that's due to an injury or two…

The Cubs should strike while the iron is hot here, because if the Marlins secure the funds for a new ballpark they might keep Johnson and go on another spending spree.

(That's probably a top ten all-time Onion article)

Additional vague trade rumor of the moment

The Cubs are interested in Dan Haren, and according to Heyman they have been involved in "talks". The Angels have to decide today if they're going to pick up his option. I would be shocked if a deal gets done here though. The Angels don't have a ton of leverage.

Minor league coaching hires

The Cubs have hired Anthony Iapoce as the new minor league hitting coordinator. He was previously an instructor in the Blue Jays system, and a career minor leaguer with the Brewers and Marlins before that. The Cubs also grabbed Vandy pitching coach Derek Johnson as the new minor league pitching coordinator. Vandy went to the College World Series in 2011, and eight of their pitchers were drafted (two in the first round), and he also worked with David Price before he was drafted.

Is there a Cubs game today?

No.

Off-topic comments thread I recently enjoyed

There was much discussion of board and role-playing games in the comments yesterday, as well as arguments for and against plastic cutting boards. Needless to say, it's been our busiest day in weeks here at OV. The 2013 Cubs, everyone!

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Comments

  1. Rice Cube

    As Aisley pointed out, given Mather’s -1.5 fWAR last year he’s probably going to have to pay some team $15m to play for them next year (laughing)

    Probably even more if Mark Shapiro is correct.

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  2. Author
    Berselius

    That said I like the idea of trading for Josh Johnson better. Do both! Even if they just get one, a top of the rotation of

    Johnson/Haren
    Garza
    F7

    actually seems worth watching

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  3. Rice Cube

    @ Berselius:
    I think that’s what the Royals did with Santana, but my back of the napkin scribble-calculations suggest that Haren is better than Santana so they’d probably have to pony up a better prospect.

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  4. WaLi

    @ GBTS:
    I’d think he would be great to play board games with.

    He would also upgrade our rotation. He made $12.75M last year, would he be expected to come for less?

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  5. Rice Cube

    @ WaLi:
    The 2013 option is worth $15.5MM and the Angels might send over the $3.5MM buyout. But if not I think the Cubs have the money to absorb the full hit. Seems unlikely they would trade for Haren, buy him out, and then risk losing him to the open market afterwards…?

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  6. mb21

    GW wrote:

    I wish the Cubs would poach the astros’ tv guys. They really grew on me this year.

    I used to dislike them, but don’t have a problem with them anymore. I haven’t listened to them as much as you.

    I’m in Plesac’s corner on this one. Yes, he’s annoying and talks too much, but I know the times he filled in for Brenly he provided more ballplayer-type analysis than I’d heard from a Cubs announcer in years. Maybe that’s because he talks so much. I don’t know, but I liked him. I think Plesac and Kasper would be a pretty good team.

    I don’t really know anything about Karros in terms of announcing.

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  7. mb21

    @ Rice Cube:
    I would assume they’d sign him to an extension. I don’t expect the Cubs to pull the trade off. There are teams who could use Haren more than the Cubs and they’d presumably be willing to offer more.

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  8. Author
    Berselius

    @ mb21:

    I don’t think that he’ll be traded anyway. It sure seems like the Angels aren’t going to pick up the option, so teams would probably rather just take the chance that he’ll be a FA.

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  9. GW

    @ mb21:

    they have kind of a deadpan humor that works pretty well. and deshaies incorporates analytics as well as anybody, fits it smoothly into the analysis; polar opposite of what kasper and brenly did.

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  10. josh

    I wish the Cubs would poach the astros’ tv guys. They really grew on me this year.

    You might try an antifungal.

    I’m slow getting to jokes today.

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  11. josh

    @ Rice Cube:
    Wha? That one was instanteous for me. Granted, I was just looking these guys up the other day as part of a “Who was Donatello, anyway?” question that popped into my head. Turned out he was kind of the guy who inspired the other dudes, but was less famous himself (if I’m recalling correctly).

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  12. josh

    @ mb21:
    Right, but he’s filling a spot and allowing the guys in the lower leagues to develop. i’m just basing that off what Jed said in that video. Who knows what he’d really do.

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  13. Aisle424

    josh wrote:

    @ mb21:
    Right, but he’s filling a spot and allowing the guys in the lower leagues to develop. i’m just basing that off what Jed said in that video. Who knows what he’d really do.

    Filling a spot is one thing. You can argue Joe Mather filled a spot. But Josh Vitters is fucking terrible, we all suspected he’d be fucking terrible, and from what I’ve heard he isn’t overly interested in taking extra time to improve anything he is fucking terrible at. So he isn’t filling anything.

    Now, why the Angels would want a fucking terrible guy is a different story, but I don’t think the Cubs will have any problems jettisoning any of Hendry’s “kids.” I think they’re posturing to make teams think they think more highly of their current system than they really do.

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  14. Aisle424

    mb21 wrote:

    For the love of god, will you please take Josh Vitters?

    I feel like I’m a better prospect than Josh Vitters at this point.

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  15. Mish

    mb21 wrote:

    For the love of god, will you please take Josh Vitters?

    Dear photoshopers of OV Blog: there has to be a good way to combine Josh Vitters in to the Fry “Shut up and take my money” meme.

    Love,
    Batman

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  16. Akabari

    Thanks to you guys, I played a 6 hour game of Axis And Allies yesterday. But at least I won. nobody fucks with Japan.

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  17. mb21

    Aisle424 wrote:

    ut Josh Vitters is fucking terrible, we all suspected he’d be fucking terrible, and from what I’ve heard he isn’t overly interested in taking extra time to improve anything he is fucking terrible at. So he isn’t filling anything.

    Now, why the Angels would want a fucking terrible guy is a different story

    I’m still laughing at this comment by 424. (dying laughing)

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  18. mb21

    @ josh:
    Some were. I was not one of them. I gave up on Vitters awhile back. Dude cannot take a walk to save his life. That would be OK if he played good defense and/or could hit for a lot of power. He does neither. Vitters has been an afterthought in this organization as far I’ve been concerned for some time. He even fell down out of the top 5 Cubs prospects prior to 2012 and that’s saying something considering the cubs didn’t yet have Rizzo, Soler or Almora.

    Could something change all of a sudden? Sure. He could get better defensively or hit for a lot more power. It isn’t at all likely. Maybe he even starts taking walks at a decent rate. Who really knows? Odds are he does none of this.

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  19. josh

    @ mb21:
    I don’t really follow the minor leagues, so i have no idea. It’s probably just a case of I’ve heard his name so damn many times I’ve just assumed he was important.

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  20. GBTS

    I thought it would be obvious considering we had several posts this year regarding Josh Vitters and his wRC rivaling Roy Halladay.

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  21. WaLi

    @ josh:
    I’m confused. Is there nothing more than they are wearing turtle masks? I kept looking for more and more, but couldn’t find anything.

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  22. mb21

    @ GBTS:
    I forgot about that. I wonder if any player who had a wRC+ of 10 or lower in his first 110 plate appearances ever amounted to shit. The list is small, but surely there’s a few guys who did.

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  23. josh

    @ WaLi:
    It’s the actual guys the TMN turtles are named after wearing the proper turtle ninja eye mask of the ninja. I don’t think there’s anything more to it than that.

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  24. Rizzo the Rat

    Heh, looked up Raphael on Wikipedia:

    According to Vasari, Raphael’s premature death on Good Friday (April 6, 1520), which was possibly his 37th birthday, was caused by a night of excessive sex with Luti, after which he fell into a fever and, not telling his doctors that this was its cause, was given the wrong cure, which killed him.[73]

    Never thought I’d envy a guy who died at 37.

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  25. Rizzo the Rat

    All those rock musicians who OD’d or choked on their own vomit are amateurs. That’s how you die young.

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  26. mikeakaleroy

    “Hi, Theo? I’ve got a proven frontline starter coming off a lousy year, but what I really need is a closer that can’t find the strike zone.”— Jay Jaffe (@jay_jaffe) November 3, 2012

    (dying laughing)

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  27. Rizzo the Rat

    I’m excited about the trade, but I’m a little concerned about Haren. He was hurt last year, and his velocity was down. He could recover, but velocity is like water in that it tends to run downhill.

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  28. uncle dave

    mb21 wrote:

    @ Jed Jam Band:
    Yeah it is though to be fair, the Angels were kind of bent over.

    mb21 wrote:

    @ mb21:
    Still a great deal though.

    I think those two things often go together.

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  29. Berselius

    I wonder how long it would take for thoyer to extend Haren, if that’s in the plans. Or they could just flip him for prospects.

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  30. uncle dave

    @ Rizzo the Rat:
    Yup, there’s risk here. Still, it’s only one more year he has on his deal, right? And it’s a year where the Cubs have payroll room and where it doesn’t really matter if he sucks. Best case is that he pulls it back together and becomes very valuable at the deadline, or even for a multi-year deal. He could even be middling and the Cubs could get a pick off of a qualifying offer.

    And all this for Carlos Marmol and his oversized deal. Not much to dislike here, unless there’s something else going on.

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  31. Rizzo the Rat

    Wikipedia says:

    Daniel John Haren (born September 17, 1980) is a Major League Baseball starting pitcher for the Chicago Cubs.[1]

    And if I can’t trust Wikipedia, whom can I trust?

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