Today in Rant Sports Awfulness

In Commentary And Analysis by dmick8934 Comments

Aisle 424 ripped Rant Sports a new one last night and today we've got another reason to do so. Let's just start with the title.

Theo Epstein: The Portrait of a Snake-Oil Salesman

A snake oil salesman is someone who is basically a fraud because what he's selling (elixirs usually), have been proven to not work. Theo Epstein has two World Championships and  was the GM of a team that had 7 seasons with 90 or more wins. If you don't like statty things, he's one of the most respected GMs in the game over the last quarter century. A lot of things could probably be said about Theo, but a snake oil saleman simply isn't one of them.

Tom Rickets has all of us Chicago Cubs fan fooled. He made a big deal about bringing in baseball’s most recognized face to fix a franchise that has been broken for over 100 years. I’ll admit that I was very excited when the Cubs hired Theo Epstein, but based on what I’ve seen, he’s nothing more than a pretty face.

Truthfully, Ricketts did not make a big deal about hiring Theo. He went about his search rather quietly and it was the media, and the fans, that made a big deal of it. Ricketts had his new GM give a press conference as all new GMs do. We learned he was hired as the team president so we also knew they'd have to hire a GM. Ricketts kept a rather low profile duing all of this.

I'm not sure what this guy has seen, but I'll point out the 2 World Championships and 7 seasons with 90+ wins once more. Maybe he is a pretty face, but he also has an impressive track record and any person who can claim otherwise "based on what I've seen" is blind, full of shit and stupid.

I am getting sick and tired of hearing how Cubs fans need to be patient.

At least he's not blind, deaf, full of shit and stupid.

Teams like the Toronto Blue Jays (that I promise you don’t have near the fan base or attendance of the Cubs) trade for players to help them win today. Meanwhile, the Cubs add an injured starting pitcher and a backup catcher. So a team that lost over 100 games still isn’t addressing the team on the field?

Teams like the Toronto Blue Jays? (dying laughing)

We all hear that the Cubs will be competitive in 2014

We do? Can someone point me to all the articles or press conferences in which Theo, Jed or Ricketts has said they'll be competitive in 2014? What? You can't find one. The voices in this guy's head do not count.

The Cubs have been very clear as was pointed out last night. They're building this team from the bottom up and it's going to take awhile. I think the Cubs could and should be doing a little more, but they have been quite clear about this and as honest as one could hope.

and frankly, I just don’t buy it.

Frankly, nobody is trying to tell that.

If you look at what happened with Epstein’s former employer the Boston Red Sox, they pretty much undid everything Epstein did as general manager. That should be quite a telling sign.

If you look at what happened with Epstein's former employer the Boston Red Sox, they pretty much played excellent baseball for most of his tenure, but he did make some mistakes because, frankly, he's a human being.

If you want to help your promising young players like Starlin Castro and Anthony Rizzo, there’s no better way of helping player development than winning.

It's true. Statisticians have shown it to be 100% true that the best thing to developing talent is winning. It's not a good player development system. Nope. It's not regular playing time. No way. It's definitely not working on your weaknesses and refining your overall game. Bullshit. It's winning. Can you imagine how good Andrew McCutchen would be if the Pirates would just fucking win? They have royally fucked him over because, frankly, they refused to win and help him develop. Assholes!

Creating a culture of losing helps players form bad habits.

And there is absolutely nothing that coaches can do to break these bad habits since, frankly, that's what they're paid to do.

While there’s no guarantees in baseball

Bull motherfucking shit! The Cubs just have to take after teams like the Toronto Blue Jays, Milwaukee Brewers and Seattle Mariners. That's how you win, bitch.

And how much worse can a team get than 100 losses?

You can be worse by exactly 62 games. This ain't difficult.

This is a great example of a Rant My Life moment.

And frankly, my response is a great example of my My Obstructed Life moment.

At Rant, we are asking our readers to Hashtag #RML with your frustrations. And of course, you can follow me on Twitter @Douchebag.

At Obstructed, we are asking our readers to Hashtag #RANTSPORTSSUCKS with your frustrations. And frankly, you should follow us on Twitter @OVBlog.

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Comments

  1. Rice Cube

    Bull motherfucking shit! The Cubs just have to take after teams like the Toronto Blue Jays, Milwaukee Brewers and Seattle Mariners. That’s how you win, bitch.

    I liked this a lot more than I probably should have.

    You may have missed a quote box towards the end, mb. This was enjoyable.

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  2. Rice Cube

    If you hadn’t already chosen your Cubs 2013 slogan, I would’ve voted for “That’s how you win, bitch.”

    I realize it’s not entirely appropriate given the projected shittiness of the team, but I would have been amused.

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  3. Aisle424

    Thank you for addressing this dipshit, MB, because, frankly, I’m still recovering from being exposed to that other radioactive post. Jesus Christ, frankly, that site sucks. And, frankly, I’m a little pissed off that you made me aware of it.

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  4. SVB

    I’m a little disappointed also that you didn’t the absolutely horrible font they used on their rant. Pretty much as unreadable as their text.

    Vitters
    Vitters

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  5. mb21

    @ Aisle424:
    When GBTS first posted the link my thought was to ignore it because I didn’t want to send ANY traffic to that site. Then I realized I was bored and I didn’t really give a shit about sending traffic to that shitty site so I wrote it.

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  6. Aisle424

    @ mb21:
    I had the same debate with myself. But fuck it, they’re getting plenty of traffic without our few extra hits, so we might as well point out when they are awful.

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  7. ChicagoBearJew

    Dear MB21,

    Instead of writing your profanity-laced pieces, why don’t you show some class and do a question and answer with me on Rant Sports and the Cubs? Since we keep it classy and clean, it may be an issue for you. But we will be happy to post a debate on our answers against yours when it comes to the Cubs. So what do you say? Are you tough enough to do it? Or does your inappropriate language express your lack of confidence.

    ChicagoBearJew…

    PS-We don’t resort to hashtagging about other sites.

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  8. Ranter X

    Classy eh Jonathan Caroll? You mean you handling of writers? Possibly favoritism exhibited towards talentless writers, while the better ones are pushed asided. How the better writers gain followings and you won’t let them check numbers on views and talentless hacks like Riley Schmidt get $1000 a month. Please you are as classless as it gets.

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  9. http://www.ppjaponesia.org/userinfo.php?uid=967962

    Today, I went to the beach front with my kids. I found a sea
    shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She put the shell to her ear and screamed.
    There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear.
    She never wants to go back! LoL I know this is completely off topic but
    I had to tell someone!

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