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  • Wild Card Friday “Series” Previews, including an all-new playoff results simulator!

    Tonight's games:

    St. Louis at Atlanta: Kyle Lohse, RHP (2.86, 3.51, 3.96) vs Kris Medlen, RHP (1.57, 2.42, 2.97), 4:07 PM CT

    It's hard to believe that Lohse has put up nearly 11 fWAR since the Cardinals picked him up off the scrap heap. I would say he's a member of the Wandy Rodriguez Hall of Fame, except he's not as good as Wandy. I wouldn't be surprised if Dave Duncan becomes the first pitching coach inducted to the HOF.

    I didn't even realize Medlen was a starter until a few weeks ago, let alone that he missed almost all of last year following Tommy John surgery. I think I keep mixing him up with Braves* closer Craig Kimbrel. Though in my defense he's only made 12 starts this year. He's posted a 0.91 ERA in those starts, so he's got that going for him. Note to the Nationals – see how the Braves have their top young pitcher throwing in the playoffs? That would sure be a nice thing to have.

    *Thanks to @CapitolAvenue, I keep misspelling the Braves as Barves.

    Baltimore at Texas: Joe Saunders, LOL (4.07, 4.08, 4.25) vs Yu Darvish, RHP (3.90, 3.29, 3.52) 7:37 PM CT

    I don't know what's more baffling, the Orioles postseason run with a run differential of +7 or the fact that Joe Fucking Saunders put up a 3.63 ERA, 3.77 FIP in the AL east after moving to Baltimore. The Orioles deserve to lose this game on principle for starting Joe Saunders in an elimination game.

    Darvish had a rocky first few starts in MLB, walking 13 in 17.2 innings, but since then he's been pretty much exactly what the Rangers have been hoping for. In his debut year, he struck out 221 batters in 191.1 innings and issued 89 walks, posting 5.1 fWAR.

    Predictions:

    One of the reasons why posts have slowed down here at OV is because we've been working on a top secret wild card playoff game simulator. After weeks of argument and optimization, here's how it works.

    1. Reach into your pocket and grab a coin
    2. Assign one team to each face
    3. Flip it to see what face comes up

    The results of this extremely scientific simulator says the winners will be the Braves and the Rangers.

    Berselius
    He's got a two day head start on you, which is more than he needs. He's got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see him again. With any luck, he's got the grail already.
    Berselius

    22 Responses to “Wild Card Friday “Series” Previews, including an all-new playoff results simulator!”

    1. WaLi 1 WaLi says:

      My predictions say Cardinals and Orioles. I think my coin is broken.

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    2. Berselius 2 Berselius says:

      @ WaLi:

      Send us $500 and we’ll send you the official OV prediction coin.

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    3. Berselius 3 Berselius says:

      @ WaLi:

      Scratch that, we’ll send you a replica.

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    4. WenningtonsGorillaCock 4 WenningtonsGorillaCock says:

      Berselius wrote:

      Joe Saunders, (dying laughing)

      (dying laughing)

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    5. Mish 5 Mish says:

      Are th O’s trotting out Saunders? I’d take the righty-heavy Rangers lineup in that case.

      I’m going to pick the Braves because I want the Braves to win, mostly for Chipper.

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    6. Berselius 6 Berselius says:

      @ Mish:
      I’d like the Braves to win, because they ate the better team, but couldn’t care less about Chipper. It’s not like he doesn’t have a ring.

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    7. mb21 7 mb21 says:

      @ Berselius:
      The Braves ate the better team? That’s not against the rules?

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    8. josh 8 josh says:

      @ mb21:
      “Rule 2.124: No team shall at any time, engage in acts of cannibalism against the opposing team, including but not limited to: eating head of losing team, pulling still-beating hearts from bodies while rounding the bases, pulling off opposing teams arms and eating them lamb leg style. These guidelines should be considered exemplary, but not exhaustive.”

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    9. Berselius 9 Berselius says:

      @ mb21:

      Why are you making fun of my typo? Did I break into your house and piss on your curtains or something?

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    10. WaLi 10 WaLi says:

      @ mb21:

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    11. WaLi 11 WaLi says:

      @ WaLi:
      Excuse my shitty ass paint skills (dying laughing)

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    12. mb21 12 mb21 says:

      @ josh:
      (dying laughing)

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    13. Berselius 14 Berselius says:

      @ WenningtonsGorillaCock:

      I saw the first line of the title “Weird child pretends to be utility infielder” and thought it was about David Eckstein.

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    14. josh 15 josh says:

      @ Berselius:
      You mean just like a straight biography?

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    15. josh 16 josh says:

      When is baseball?

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    16. mikeakaleroy 18 mikeakaleroy says:

      @ josh:

      St. Louis at Atlanta: Kyle Lohse, RHP (2.86, 3.51, 3.96) vs Kris Medlen, RHP (1.57, 2.42, 2.97), 4:07 PM CT

      /read every word

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    17. mikeakaleroy 19 mikeakaleroy says:

      @ Berselius:
      No, no, no…He said baseball….What the Cubs did was not baseball.

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    18. Rice Cube 20 Rice Cube says:

      @ mikeakaleroy:
      I see what you did there.

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

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