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  • Daily Facepalm 3.13.12

    Obstructed View Daily Facepalm

    Practice game wrapup

    The Cubs knocked the eminently hittable Bronson Arroyo around in the first inning, capped off by an approximately 900 ft Alfonso Soriano HR (HR distance estimated by the sound it made coming off the bat and Len's reaction). Paul Maholm performed about as expected in his Cubs debut, giving up a homer to Reds outfielder Todd Frazier but mostly generating a ton of grounders. Jeff Samardzija started the third inning with a hit batter and gave up two runs before settling down and going three largely positive innings. Aside from that hit batsman, he struck out three and didn't walk anyone. Despite Sveum's gushing he's probably still a longshot for the rotation but it's nice to see him finally pitching well. Carlos Marmol continued his struggles, walking two and giving up two hits on his way to three runs in his inning of work. The Cubs came back on a three run homer by Joe Mather to give Marmol the doubly meaningless win.

    Junior Lake fouled a ball off his ankle (a bone-on-bone impact, per Zonk). It's been taped up, there should be some update on it today.

    Former Cub Sean Marshall pitched a scoreless inning for the Reds, striking out two batters.

    Is there a Cubs game today?

    Indeed. The Cubs face Madison Bumgarner and the Giants at 3 CT. Len Kasper and Mick Gillespie have the call on gameday audio. Here's the Cubs lineup

    RF DeJesus
    2B Barney
    SS Castro
    LF Soriano
    1B LaHair
    3B Mather
    C Clevenger
    CF Sappelt
    P Volstad

    We don't have to worry about Sveum getting annoyed with what we write

    From Muskat:

    Basically all I know how to do is get on the Internet and check scores or on my phone and email a little bit but I”m not searching articles. To me, that doesn’t make sense why you’d read good or bad. Obviously, we know there’s going to be more bad than good so it’s irrelevant to look at articles or seek any kind of media that way. I’ve got better things to do than seek out articles on myself or the team. I’m living the team, the nine innings, every single night. I know what goes on. I don’t have to look to find out what somebody else thinks. I know what’s going on.

    Sveum has experience with a large, dagger-drawing media market from his time with Boston, so hopefully he'll be much more savvy than Cuey. So far it looks pretty good. Once the season begins and the Cubs inevitably start losing, Cubs fans and the media could quickly start losing their patience.

    Payroll page updated

    The OV Payroll page has been updated with the Gerardo Concepcion signing, as well as the Cubs settlements with its prearb players (most notably Jeff Samardzija) and Matt Garza's arb settlement. The Cubs are on the hook for about $114 million for 2012, which is surprisingly third in the division behind the Cardinals and Brewers.

    Roster cleanup, roster battles

    Casey Weathers was taken off the 40-man roster yesterday. I wouldn't be surprised if this was to re-clear room for Blake DeWitt, who's having a nice spring and seems to be in good regard with the manager. Of course, I don't really get why the Cubs didn't just do this when they DFA'd DeWitt a few weeks ago. DeWitt isn't a star or anything, but I think he's a much better player than his performance reflected last season.

    There are basically just two-and-a-half position player roster spots open at this point. Steve Clevenger and Welington Castillo are battling for the Koyie Hill Memorial backup catcher spot. I know MB thinks Clevenger will get it but I think it's Castillo's to lose. I think Tony Campana has a tenuous hold on the fifth outfielder spot, due to his speed and the fact that the other two CFs on the roster (Marlon Byrd, Reed Johnson) are right handed. Of course, Brett Jackson is a much better option than any of these guys but he shouldn't be up until May or June. Joe Mather has also played some CF in his time in the Cardinals organization, and could have a shot at a roster spot due to the fact that he can also play some 3B. His hitting numbers stink (Marcel has him at .291 wOBA), but platoon splits could still be enough to push him ahead of Ian Stewart against LHP.

    Cubs come in 20th in BP Org rankings

    Snark-blurb from KG:

    The rebuild his begun, but there is still much work to be done. When your team's fans are obsessed with Matt Szczur and Junior Lake, doesn't speak well of the system.

    In case you were wondering, the Texas Rangers came in as #6org in KG's rankings. The original #6org came in seventh.

    More farm system discussion

    Hardball Times also has a piece up going more in depth about the Cubs organization. Writer Jeff Moore would place the Cubs system in the middle of the pack, and has lots of nice things to say about Brett Jackson. He basically calls him a middle-class man's Matt Kemp/Jacoby Ellsbury.

    GIF of the day

    Paula Deen hit in the face with a frozen ham.

    Berselius
    He's got a two day head start on you, which is more than he needs. He's got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see him again. With any luck, he's got the grail already.
    Berselius

    76 Responses to “Daily Facepalm 3.13.12”

    1. GBTS 1 GBTS says:

      Carryover from last thread:
      Many condolences, Mish. Cancer fucking sucks.

      If I were on my home computer I’d offer a Yellon photoshop of your choice. Consider it an open offer.

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    2. GBTS 2 GBTS says:

      If Brett Jackson even sniffs what Kemp or Ellsbury did in 2011 I’ll be quite happy.

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    3. Rice Cube 4 Rice Cube says:

      Junior Lake fouled a ball off his ankle (a bone-on-bone impact, per Zonk).

      So baseballs are made of bone now. How morbid.

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    4. mb21 5 mb21 says:

      I know MB thinks Clevenger will get it but I think it’s Castillo’s to lose.

      Based on playing time so far I’d say that’s true. I don’t expect Castillo to last long as the back-up catcher. What the Cubs need to do is trade one of those two. Or Soto. I don’t really care, but there’s no reason to have this many capable catchers on the roster. Especially when every team in baseball is looking for catching. (dying laughing)

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    5. Suburban kid 6 Suburban kid says:

      No team is going to catch the Yankees. Not only are they a national brand, but they have a lot of international fans too.

      Yeah, in my experience of living abroad for several+ years, international baseball fans can be split in the following way:

      Yankees 93%
      Red Sox 2%
      City they visited once or lived in for awhile 5%

      New York itself is an international brand, not just the Yankees (although the Mets don’t seem to benefit).

      The Red Sox have an edge due to winning the WS twice in the last 10 years. For some reason, the Cardinals do not seem to have leveraged their recent winning the same way overseas – probably because they are in the midwest and not on a coast.

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    6. josh 7 josh says:

      WaLi wrote:

      Run away!

      Yes, I’ve always been rife feed for the Hope Monster. Even having acknowledged the futility, I still will go through a hope/disappointment cycle.

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    7. Rice Cube 8 Rice Cube says:

      For berselius…you can actually sort of track the home run ball here. I think it’s definitely over 400 feet, but it could have been 900 if that crowd weren’t in the way and the ball had found its way to the back of a pickup truck as it drove off into the sunset.

      http://espn.go.com/blog/chicago/cubs/post/_/id/8345/cubs-8-reds-6

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    8. josh 9 josh says:

      How much leeway does Marmol get this season before he’s pulled as closer?

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    9. Mish 10 Mish says:

      @ GBTS:
      Hahha thanks buddy. If I think of a request I’ll holler.

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    10. Rice Cube 11 Rice Cube says:

      Levine’s chat:

      Bobby (Oak Lawn IL)

      Whats the deal with former first round pick Hayden Simpson? Is he still part of the future?

      Bruce Levine (1:14 PM)

      Very doubtful at this point. He’s had a myriad of illnesses and injuries and the talent level just might not be there.

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    11. Mish 12 Mish says:

      @ Rice Cube:
      Isn’t South Park’s Captain Obvius the only acceptable Captian Obvious these days? (dying laughing)

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    12. Rice Cube 13 Rice Cube says:

      @ Mish:
      I’ve only seen sporadic episodes between about 2002 and now so that’s one I probably missed. Was he in one of the episodes where Cartman is the “Coon”?

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    13. Rice Cube 14 Rice Cube says:

      This is obviously a typo but still funny:

      RJ (Blunt, IL)

      Bruce: I keep hearing fans / media etc saying the Cubs won’t be ready to compete until 21015. Why is that the year from what I see this team is talent deficient in the minors as is. What makes anyone think they will have any major league ready star talent by that time.

      Bruce Levine (1:44 PM)

      I think that your observation is a good one. Because nobody can pinpoint when the talent will be better. It might be better next year. Or it might not be better in the next 2 or 3 years. The new management group have good philosophies and a good track record. But they are going to have to prove it by being successful here.

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    14. Suburban kid 15 Suburban kid says:

      Daily Facepalm 3.13.12
      March 13, 2012 By Berselius

      Has MB posted a DFP yet? I don’t think so. Lazy bastard.

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    15. josh 16 josh says:

      @ Rice Cube:
      He’s right, it becomes fairly difficult to predict wins and loses 18,000 years into the future. I mean, who knows if they’ll even still be using bone baseballs by then?

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    16. Rice Cube 17 Rice Cube says:

      @ Suburban kid:
      False x 2 or 288

      http://www.obstructedview.net/news-and-rumors/daily-facepalm-2-18-12.html

      (waiting for stuff to grow in lab and to be processed by core facilities is boring)

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    17. Mucker 18 Mucker says:

      Saints resigned Colston. Bears have no choice now, they have to go all out for VJax.

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    18. WaLi 19 WaLi says:

      @ Rice Cube:
      That was a Grateful Dead laced FP I recently enjoyed.

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    19. Aisle424 20 Aisle424 says:

      I’m the only one too lazy to do a Facepalm. I’m in a weakened state from not having eaten dinner since this place opened.

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    20. WaLi 21 WaLi says:

      Listening to this now – http://www.archive.org/details/plf2012-02-18.dpa4ch.flac16

      Phil & Friends show from 2/18 with:
      Phil Lesh: Bass, Vocals (Obviously from Grateful Dead)
      John Scofield: Guitar (Great Jazz Guitarist, Medeski Martin Scofield & Wood)
      Warren Haynes: Guitar, Vocals (Allman Brothers, Gov’t Mule, The Dead)
      Jackie Greene: Guitar, Keys and Vocals (Great up and coming guitarist, plays with Phil & Friends)
      Jeff Chimenti: Keys, Vocals (Ratdog, The Dead, Furthur, Les Claypool’s Frog Brigade)
      Joe Russo: Drums (Benevento/Russo Duo, Furthur)

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    21. WaLi 22 WaLi says:

      @ Aisle424:
      If you do ever get around to eating dinner again, don’t eat red meat. Apparently they figured out it is unhealthy for you (again).
      http://www.cnn.com/2012/03/12/health/red-meat-shorten-lifespan/index.html?hpt=hp_bn10

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    22. Berselius 23 Berselius says:

      Mucker wrote:

      Saints resigned Colston. Bears have no choice now, they have to go all out for VJax and hope that Cutler isn’t killed before he has a chance to throw it to him

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    23. Berselius 24 Berselius says:

      @ Aisle424:

      Me neither, I just took inspiration from Ron Swanson and Leslie Knope and only eat breakfast food.

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    24. Rodrigo Ramirez 25 Rodrigo Ramirez says:

      For a few sophomoric laughs:

      https://twitter.com/#!/Y_U_NOOO

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    25. WaLi 26 WaLi says:

      @ Rodrigo Ramirez:
      Man those whole troll face things really go over my head.

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    26. Rodrigo Ramirez 27 Rodrigo Ramirez says:

      @ WaLi:

      I think the content is funny- but yea, I don’t get the face thing either.

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    27. Berselius 28 Berselius says:

      BN has a guess the opening day lineup/rotation contest on facebook. Prize is $75 in Cubs swag

      https://www.facebook.com/BleacherNation/posts/203875653046141

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    28. Brett 29 Brett says:

      Berselius wrote:

      Thanks for sharing that, man. In case folks want any of the nitty-gritty details, there’s more here:

      http://www.bleachernation.com/2012/03/13/the-bleacher-nation-2012-opening-day-contest-want-to-win-75/

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    29. WaLi 30 WaLi says:

      @ Rodrigo Ramirez:
      Yeah, I meant the faces themselves not the content.

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    30. GBTS 31 GBTS says:

      @ Mish:
      I believe that was Captain Hindsight.

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    31. josh 32 josh says:

      So is everybody finally coming around to my POV that Zonk is terrible? I’ve been annoyed with him since Day 1, but caught a lot of flak for it last season.

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    32. GBTS 33 GBTS says:

      @ Mucker:
      I read yesterday that they’re the front runners for Mario Williams.

      Also, Brandon Marshall —–> Bears

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    33. Mucker 34 Mucker says:

      GBTS wrote:

      @ Mucker:
      I read yesterday that they’re the front runners for Mario Williams.
      Also, Brandon Marshall —–> Bears

      I’m so happy right now.

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    34. GBTS 35 GBTS says:

      @ Mucker:
      When the reigning Pro Bowl MVP is available, you just have to go out and get him. (dying laughing)

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    35. Berselius 36 Berselius says:

      @ josh:

      I liked him okay last year, but have not so far this year.

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    36. Steve Swisher 37 Steve Swisher says:

      @ Rice Cube: Funny, was just going to post this here myself. (Dying laughing) It’s like Hendry’s little goodbye to us, isn’t it? Another first-round bust. Move over, Drew Hall! Make room, Bobby Brownlie!

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    37. WaLi 38 WaLi says:

      @ GBTS:
      Awesome! I got to see him play in college.

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    38. Berselius 39 Berselius says:

      I forgot that Theriot signed with the Giants. An even better park for him to work on his power (dying laughing)

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    39. Berselius 40 Berselius says:

      Sullivan reporting that he’s heading to Vegas later this week. Hopefully the casinos are prepared to change out pots of gold

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    40. 41 Snyds01 says:
      Mucker
      March 13, 2012 at 12:03 pm

      Saints resigned Colston. Bears have no choice now, they have to go all out for VJax.

      Brandon Marshall: “False”

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    41. Berselius 42 Berselius says:

      (dying laughing), Paul Sullivan is bitching about twitter anonymnity

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    42. Rice Cube 43 Rice Cube says:

      @ Berselius:
      Do you have some pix of Sully? I feel (if nobody’s done it before) it’s ripe for a Photoshop onto a Leprechaun.

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    43. Berselius 44 Berselius says:

      @ Rice Cube:

      SK had one a while ago that didn’t need much photoshopping to make him look like one

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    44. Berselius 45 Berselius says:

      Ricketts in the booth now

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    45. Rice Cube 46 Rice Cube says:

      @ Berselius:
      I’m listening to the Giants’ feed for some reason. I suppose I should switch that but they’re talking to Shawn Estes right now.

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    46. Rice Cube 47 Rice Cube says:

      Tons of groundouts for Volstad.

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    47. GBTS 48 GBTS says:

      @ Berselius:
      Well he should just wear the ring and conceal his identity too.

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    48. mb21 49 mb21 says:

      Suburban kid wrote:

      New York itself is an international brand, not just the Yankees (although the Mets don’t seem to benefit).

      That’s a good point. I think you’re right regarding the Cardinals lack of international support having to do with them being in the midwest. If the Cubs were really good for a decade I don’t think that would stand in the way because Chicago a such a large city. It will be hard for them to attract international fans though because so many are already Yankees fans and they’re not going to switch teams.

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    49. Rice Cube 50 Rice Cube says:

      Soriano HUSTLED?!?!?!?!?!?!

      /ded

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    50. 51 ACT says:

      Bryan LaHair is 1 K away from the golden sombrero.

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    51. Berselius 52 Berselius says:

      (dying laughing)

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    52. Rice Cube 53 Rice Cube says:

      SFGiants.com doesn’t actually have commercial breaks so you can actually hear all the lineup changes during the dead time. BJax and Rizzo in.

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    53. Aisle424 54 Aisle424 says:

      I love this because he’s picking on Kap for being a Soriano hater, like he isn’t the one lighting everyone’s torches for them. Then he has to throw in the dig about how he would have been out if the throw was better.

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    54. Berselius 55 Berselius says:

      Hey, Jay Jackson still exists!

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    55. Berselius 56 Berselius says:

      @ Aisle424:

      You have it wrong, Aisley. Orange Guy is lighting the torches, Sullivan is sharpening the knives.

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    56. Rice Cube 57 Rice Cube says:

      @ Aisle424:
      Is that a real picture?

      I’m scared.

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    57. Rice Cube 58 Rice Cube says:

      (dying laughing)
      (dying laughing)

      The Giants guys had no idea who the fuck Tony Campana was.

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    58. Aisle424 59 Aisle424 says:

      @ Rice Cube:

      Yep. Someone tagged him on Facebook and I snagged it.

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    59. Berselius 60 Berselius says:

      Jay Jackson had a nice second inning. If he recovers any of his previous prospect value that would sure be nice.

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    60. Berselius 61 Berselius says:

      @ Rice Cube:

      Hopefully they thought he was a little leaguer that wandered into the clubhouse

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    61. Rice Cube 62 Rice Cube says:

      Rizzo > Sergio Romo

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    62. Berselius 63 Berselius says:

      Rizzo just hit a monster HR

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    63. Rice Cube 64 Rice Cube says:

      @ Berselius:
      Even the Giants guys were impressed. Sounds like Romo left the ball too far up in the zone.

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    64. Berselius 65 Berselius says:

      Per Len, Breaking news —-> mlb’s expanded replay is not happening this year

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    65. Rice Cube 66 Rice Cube says:

      Shawn Estes says Campana has a noodle arm. Fontenot was gimpy and still scored standing up.

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    66. Rice Cube 67 Rice Cube says:

      Jacob Turner shut down with dead arm.

      (dying laughing)…the Giants’ scouting report on Tony Campana must be to run on him no matter what.

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    67. mb21 68 mb21 says:

      For those who haven’t entered the bracket challenge yet, you can do so here: http://games.espn.go.com/tournament-challenge-bracket/en/group?groupID=91223

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    68. Aisle424 69 Aisle424 says:

      mb21 wrote:

      For those who haven’t entered the bracket challenge yet, you can do so here: http://games.espn.go.com/tournament-challenge-bracket/en/group?groupID=91223

      Don’t tell us what to do.

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    69. Berselius 70 Berselius says:

      @ mb21:

      I need to try to remember to put that in tomorrow’s facepalm.

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    70. Suburban kid 71 Suburban kid says:

      Aisle424 wrote:

      Don’t tell us what to do.

      Al is a cunt.

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    71. mb21 72 mb21 says:

      @ Berselius:
      I was surprised it wasn’t there today.

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    72. Rice Cube 73 Rice Cube says:

      I hope that works. I guess I can’t embed MLB.com videos in comments.

      So check it out here:

      http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/mlb-big-league-stew/ichiro-impression-sean-connery-james-bond-rules-mariners-192718869.html

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    73. mb21 74 mb21 says:

      @ Rice Cube:
      I think we could enable embedding content like that in the same way we have images, but the problem with that is someone could insert something malicious. I’ve seen 424 embed things so it’s something the admins can do, but it wouldn’t be a wise idea to allow everyone to be able to do that.

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