How much is Pujols worth?

I no see know commentsez

/Bennett’d

[quote name=AndCounting](dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
AC’s suspicions ——-> confirmed.[/quote]Exactly. The heart wants what the heart wants.

[quote name=josh]I don’t want to have her babies.[/quote]
That would be pretty tough to do

[quote name=Rice Cube]Batman and Robin was much much worse than Batman Forever. Regardless, Joel Schumacher is the devil for almost killing Batman forever.

/see what I did there’d[/quote]Truth Time: I don’t know if I’ve seen that movie. Is that the one with Val Kilmer?

[quote name=Berselius]That would be pretty tough to do[/quote]Not if you really love someone.

[quote name=Rice Cube]Unless Josh is a seahorse.[/quote]This reminds me: I wonder if you lovely OVBlog folks have ever considered using the rainbow-vomiting unicorn as a design in your store.

/horse

[quote name=Rodrigo Ramirez]Hyman just tweeted other GMs firmly believe Cubs will trade Garza.[/quote]The bold part is funny.

The trading Garza part is a bit perplexing if they really want to land Pujols. Unless they’re trading Garza for an innings-eater, moving Dempster to #1 starter and the rest of the package is position players to insert into the lineup (pipe dream)…

Not that I know what the grand plan for 2012 is anyway (dying laughing)

[quote name=josh]Because it’s a homophone of “hymen”?[/quote]No homophones around here. We’re all God’s children.

I’ve now watched the first 3 episodes of Breaking Bad. It is, ahem, addictive.

[quote name=josh]The fuck is the point of that? I can see equal or greater boobs free right now anywhere on the internet. Naked ones. Ones in the midst of sexual activity, even. Why do I need hers? Either she brings something to the fap table or she doesn’t. She doesn’t for me.[/quote]
[quote name=josh]WHISKEY!!
How many fucking times do I have to say this?[/quote]
AH HA! We found the problem. Whiskey Dick.

thats pretty fucking awesome

[quote name=WaLi]AH HA! We found the problem. Whiskey Dick.[/quote]I drink in moderation.

[quote name=Mish].[/quote]I suppose that’s true as well.

[quote name=WaLi]How many people started watching Breaking Bad because of this blog?[/quote]I did.

Sorry, too easy.

so josh doesnt think like hot ladies drinks only in moderation and liked Batman Forever.

I think its time for an eBeatdown

How did Batman Forever relate to the Whiskey Dilemma? I honestly can’t remember how it ended. I remember there was a Two Face there. I was thinking he fell into something. Riddler was there. Was Poison Ivy in that one?

[quote name=Rice Cube]I think Two-Face made Batman choose whether he was saving Robin or Nicole Kidman. Batman decided to ultimately save both.[/quote]That’s a bullshit solution.

[quote name=josh]Obviously you save Nicole Kidman. Not even close.[/quote]She’s hot.

[quote name=josh]Obviously you save Nicole Kidman. Not even close.[/quote]He actually saved Nicole Kidman first and then went after Robin.

[quote name=GBTS]For as much shit as we’ve given him in the last 24 hours, Josh has remained incredibly rational.[/quote]He’s crying on the inside and plotting your demise.

[quote name=josh]Nicole Kidman was definitely my #1 circa 1995. She’s kind of weird looking now with all the plastic surgery.[/quote]She’s got Joe Buck syndrome. You can project a movie on her forehead.

So close.

[quote name=AndCounting]No left-handed Marlon Byrds around here. We’re all God’s children.[/quote].

[quote name=Rice Cube]Cool. Re: PED and the HOF:

http://itsaboutthemoney.net/archives/2011/12/01/why-i-discount-ped-use-in-hof-evaluation/?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter/quoteThat's an interesting point on Palmeiro. He also tested positive for amphetamines at one point. I don’t even see how amphetamines could be considered performance-enhancing. I’m not sure staying up all night is really going to help you play baseball better.

[quote name=Rice Cube]Not that I’ve ever taken them but I thought they were supposed to be a stimulant and also block pain receptors so you just keep working out longer because you don’t feel tired nor do you feel pain. More working out = stronger, but you also can’t detect muscle damage due to overexertion.[/quote]I guess I could see that. When my brother was on meth, he just stayed up really late and tried to score more meth, but that’s probably not the same thing. I guess if he was taking them in the off-season they might provide those benefits. Seems counterproductive to be on a stimulant during a game, if only because they hurt your ability to focus, too, don’t they?

[quote name=Rice Cube]I think the general rule with most drugs/medications is not to mix them. So if there was a lot of beer and fried chicken in the clubhouse, probably not a good idea to also take greenies. But if all the guy was doing was taking greenies and nothing else during the game I assume he’d just play very hard for a sustained period of time, like a scrappy white guy with heart.[/quote]If only I’d known the only thing standing between me and the hall of fame was taking some amphetamines.

[quote name=josh]Nicole Kidman was definitely my #1 circa 1995. She’s kind of weird looking now with all the plastic surgery.[/quote]Yeah, she reminds me of Courtney Cox who was also once quite attractive. Those days are LONG fucking gone.

[quote name=Rice Cube]Your bust would be glorious amongst the other legendary scrappy white guys with heart.[/quote]I’d be happy with a PED that got me into graduate school.

[quote name=josh]I’d be happy with a PED that got me into graduate school.[/quote]

[quote name=josh]That’ll help if I actually get in.

According to a certain Very Special Episode of Saved By the Bell I once saw, the greenies will backfire eventually, and Zack Morris will have to save me from myself.[/quote]“I’M SO EXCITED! I’M SO EXCITED!!! I’M SO……..*Sob* SCARED!!

They were “caffeine pills” but I think we all knew better.

[quote name=Aisle424]The defining Very Special Episode on speed use.

The video cannot be shown at the moment. Please try again later.

defining song on love with Meredith Baxter-Birney:

[quote name=Smokestack Lightning]Nice little roundup from Brett of Bleacher Nation on Theo’s meet the press after introducing DeJesus:

http://www.bleachernation.com/2011/12/01/theo-epstein-speaks-about-the-cba-matt-garza-fielderpujols-rumors-sean-marshalls-role-and-more/

As usual, Theo said nothing clarifying.[/quote]I really don’t think he has anything definitive to say. I mean, I don’t think he’s just being aloof. He wants to keep Garza, but doesn’t know if they can make other key signings, and maybe they’re better off trading Garza and punting next season. There’s so much up in the air, it’s hard to get pinned down into one strategy.

[quote name=Smokestack Lightning]Nice little roundup from Brett of Bleacher Nation on Theo’s meet the press after introducing DeJesus:

http://www.bleachernation.com/2011/12/01/theo-epstein-speaks-about-the-cba-matt-garza-fielderpujols-rumors-sean-marshalls-role-and-more/

As usual, Theo said nothing clarifying.[/quote]I think we have to pay attention to Theo’s wording. He says Garza is LIKE a player they want to build around not definitive that Garza is the actual guy they want to build around. I know that’s being picky but this isn’t Hendry. Plus I think they aren’t going to announce they are shopping Garza as they want to keep all things close the vest while building as much value as possible.

[quote name=JMan]I think we have to pay attention to Theo’s wording. He says Garza is LIKE a player they want to build around not definitive that Garza is the actual guy they want to build around. I know that’s being picky but this isn’t Hendry. Plus I think they aren’t going to announce they are shopping Garza as they want to keep all things close the vest while building as much value as possible.[/quote]
This is absolutely a regime where words spoken to the media need to be taken as loosely as possible. He’s shown time and again he doesn’t like showing his hand. It’s a reputation that goes back to Boston, so taking carefully crafted words used when talking at a planned media session is hardly a window into Theo’s soul.

But we can glean some information assuming it all isn’t blatant lies (which we can’t assume 100%, but that is true of almost anyone).

I think Theo is basically saying that the Cubs would love to have Garza as part of the team, but not so much that he’s in some untouchable realm where he won’t move him if someone else perceives him to be worth more than the Cubs do and provides that kind of compensation.

I mean, if the Nationals walked up and said they’d give us Bryce Harper and Stephen Strasburg for Matt Garza, you fucking do it and to hell with what you just told Paul Sullivan and his merry men.

Theo is quite good at saying enough to satisfy the press who just want something to write, despite the fact they all know the answer is bullshit, and leaving himself all kinds of loopholes and outs for whatever his strategy is or becomes through mitigating circumstances.

[quote name=Aisle424]This is absolutely a regime where words spoken to the media need to be taken as loosely as possible. He’s shown time and again he doesn’t like showing his hand. It’s a reputation that goes back to Boston, so taking carefully crafted words used when talking at a planned media session is hardly a window into Theo’s soul.

But we can glean some information assuming it all isn’t blatant lies (which we can’t assume 100%, but that is true of almost anyone).

I think Theo is basically saying that the Cubs would love to have Garza as part of the team, but not so much that he’s in some untouchable realm where he won’t move him if someone else perceives him to be worth more than the Cubs do and provides that kind of compensation.

I mean, if the Nationals walked up and said they’d give us Bryce Harper and Stephen Strasburg for Matt Garza, you fucking do it and to hell with what you just told Paul Sullivan and his merry men.

Theo is quite good at saying enough to satisfy the press who just want something to write, despite the fact they all know the answer is bullshit, and leaving himself all kinds of loopholes and outs for whatever his strategy is or becomes through mitigating circumstances.[/quote]Exactly. If he can get an extra $5-10 million in value over what Garza is really worth thanks to market demands, then he might be able to get an MLB ready player back from the deal and fill a hole elsewhere more cheaply. Maybe it’s not ideal for 2012, but could be a better long-term deal.

[quote name=JMan]It’s nice to know we have a GM that will do what it takes to build a players value instead of telegraphing every move to the media.[/quote]I agree that Theo is better suited for that than Hendry, but considering the amount of Garza trade talk I’m not necessarily sure Garza is an example of why Theo is better suited.

[quote name=mb21]I agree that Theo is better suited for that than Hendry, but considering the amount of Garza trade talk I’m not necessarily sure Garza is an example of why Theo is better suited.[/quote]The key difference for me is that they’re getting that info from the other GM’s, not Theo.

[quote name=josh]The key difference for me is that they’re getting that info from the other GM’s, not Theo.[/quote]Maybe that was part of his evil plan. Or the GMs could also be fooled by Theo’s poker face. Is he bluffing, or is he hiding a full house?

[quote name=josh]The key difference for me is that they’re getting that info from the other GM’s, not Theo.[/quote]Well, it wasn’t like Hendry came out in November with a list of players he wanted to trade. Not once did he do that. I don’t remember a single player where Hendry stated anything like this: we’d really like to trade this guy. If you’re referring to guys like Sosa or Bradley that he helped run out of town, I’d point you to Nomar and Manny in Boston (and probably others).

This is my favorite:

Tango just wrote something about some of these Royals fans. Insane.

It seemed pretty stupid and over the top, but not enough to actually make it funny, which is why I had a hard time deciphering. Going through the comments makes me think it was a joke of some sort, but I don’t get it.

Maybe it’s like when we ask if something is like a misting station. You had to be there.

The mafia killed him?

It’s potentially a 4/36 deal if the 4th year option vests (dying laughing)

[quote name=Aisle424]It seemed pretty stupid and over the top, but not enough to actually make it funny, which is why I had a hard time deciphering. Going through the comments makes me think it was a joke of some sort, but I don’t get it.

Maybe it’s like when we ask if something is like a misting station. You had to be there.[/quote]Weird inside jokes on the interwebz? Impossibruuuuu!

INTERNET! Y U NO LET ME IN ON JOKE!?

[quote name=josh]Three times in the FOX article on the subject, they point out that Heath Bell isn’t Pedro Martinez. Is this something that people have been confused about?[/quote]I’ve been too busy trying to work out the difference between Darwin Barney and David Ortiz. It’s like they’re the same player.

Buster Olney said this morning that it’s a buyer’s market for closers. I guess Bell and Papelbon were discounts (dying laughing)

[quote name=mb21]I’ve not looked at Bell’s stats in a year or so, but 4/36 doesn’t sound too bad to me based on what I last knew. Is he much worse than he once was?[/quote]
He’s 34, and a relief pitcher. That’s enough for me.

[quote name=bubblesdachimp]Been bullshiting with Berselius on twitter. I think we should go after LoMO..[/quote]When is he supposed to come back? I thought he had or is going to have some kind of surgery.

Would you trade Marmol for Jed Lowrie?

[quote name=mb21]who the fuck is LoMo?[/quote]Logan Morrison, maybe?

[quote name=mb21]who the fuck is LoMo?[/quote]You dont do the twitter thing do you MB?

[quote name=mb21]Kind of. I don’t talk about the Cubs too much.[/quote]Iowa football?

darrenrovell darren rovell
Sportsbook.com: Where will Pujols play his 1st game of ’12? Cards 1/3, Cubs 3/1, Yanks & Red Sox 6/1, Marlins 7/1.

http://harding.mlblogs.com/2011/12/02/post-rox-ask-cubs-for-dewitt-in-exchange-for-stewart/

gut reaction: yes please

[quote name=josh]It’s almost all Cubs stuff.[/quote](dying laughing) that’s because the posts here auto-publish. I did say a few Cubs things yesterday though. (dying laughing)

Stewart’s wRC+ last year was 13.

[quote name=Berselius]I’m not trying to imply that he’s a difference maker. I just think he’s better than Blake DeWitt.

I was about to argue that he’s also lot younger but then looked up DeWitt’s age and saw that he is also 26. I could have sworn he was 30-31 (dying laughing)[/quote]It’s weird. Everyone (myself included) thinks DeWitt is an old guy. Play the kid!

[quote name=ACT]Anyway, the Bell deal (along with Soria, Broxton, and Papelbon) is yet another reminder that the Cubs really need to trade Marmol.[/quote]I’m surprised we haven’t heard more rumors about Marmol. Must be no interest on the Cubs part in trading him, which kind of sucks.

[quote name=ACT]Stewart is hard to read, since he played in Colorado and had a terrible 2011. I think he’s probably pretty close to DeWitt in talent, unless his 2011 struggles continue (was there an injury issue or something?)[/quote]
Apparently he had a wrist injury

http://hardballtalk.nbcsports.com/2011/11/09/non-tender-candidate-ian-stewart-still-limited-by-wrist-injury/

BRef has Stewart’s 2nd most similar batter at the age of 26 as Shane Andrews. #3 is Steve Buechele.

The new Cubs, same as the old Cubs.

#1 is Mike Pagliarulo.

That royals thing is a joke. The guy who runs it is probably the best writer SB has. He’s had some hilarious posts over the years.

[quote name=dylanj]That royals thing is a joke. The guy who runs it is probably the best writer SB has. He’s had some hilarious posts over the years.[/quote]
I thought so, but I just didn’t get it. It wasn’t over the top enough to be clearly funny, so I’m just assuming I am missing a ton of inside jokes or something.

its an inside joke. Last year he wrote a pretty good piece on Crawford opening antique bookstores with his Boston $ and the story actually got picked up to the point where Crawford had to mention it on twitter. http://www.royalsreview.com/2010/12/12/1871536/carl-crawford-to-open-antiquarian-bookstore-in-boston

[quote name=ACT]So, on DeWitt vs. Stewart:

Roughly same age, roughly same career value, Stewart is more expensive and is coming off injury/terrible 2011. Not sure why so many people like this trade.[/quote]To be fair, it’s just a rumor. Perhaps there is more to the trade, if it actually gets done than a straight swap. Can Blake man third regularly?

[quote name=Aisle424]I think Stewart had higher upside. He definitely has more power. He was a fantasy tease in his early years, where you’d ride a hot streak and you’d think he finally broke out, and then he’d just regress back to being basically worthless for long stretches.

I don’t think deWitt ever had the highs of Stewart, only promise that maybe he’d eventually develop more power. I think we can say that ship has sailed.[/quote]DeWitt will never have power, but I’m skeptical Stewart’s power is going to leave Colorado with him. I’d want more than Stewart. He’ll be paid about $3 million. DeWitt will be paid about $1 million. A straight-up swap of these two is a poor trade for the Cubs.

it was kind of neat to see Epstein talk about DeJesus improving our base running. Obviously he’s seen how shitty its been the last few years

[quote name=ACT]Third base is Blake’s natural position, and his numbers are better there.[/quote]I guess power would be the main thing then.

[quote name=mb21]DeWitt will never have power, but I’m skeptical Stewart’s power is going to leave Colorado with him. I’d want more than Stewart. He’ll be paid about $3 million. DeWitt will be paid about $1 million. A straight-up swap of these two is a poor trade for the Cubs.[/quote]Cash or prospects?

[quote name=Suburban kid 2 or 288]I’m still wondering why DeWitt wasn’t included in the various Cubs hitter projections and almost thought he was already traded or released.[/quote]I’m still wondering when Sveum will join the Superfriends.. hint hint nudge nudge

[quote name=Suburban kid 2 or 288]I’m still wondering why DeWitt wasn’t included in the various Cubs hitter projections and almost thought he was already traded or released.[/quote](dying laughing) didn’t even notice it. I don’t think I intentionally left him out so there may not be projections for him.

Nope. It’s not in the Oliver file I have.

[quote name=josh]It’s the beard. When I was 16 I grew a goatee so I could buy nudie mags at the gas station. Never carded once. Power of the beard.[/quote]
Or maybe the brown fella behind the register just felt bad for the little white kid buying gay porn.

[quote name=Dr. Aneus Taint]I’d neg rep that myself if I could.[/quote]
It is done.

btw, there’s more to those bullshit radio rumors out of Kansas about Mack Brown retiring this weekend than bullshit radio rumors out of Kansas. Mack is reportedly working on his exit strategy, which could be expedited under certain circumstances. In fact, word is that there is a theoretical perfect storm that could lead to Mack retiring after this season.

[quote name=mb21]who the fuck is Lobo?[/quote]

Omar Minaya —> Padres

http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2011/12/padres-hire-omar-minaya.html

[quote name=josh]He’s Dominican, meaning he only GMs when it doesn’t matter.[/quote]That lack of hustle is going to kill him.

[quote name=ACT]Yeah, but some people are saying a straight swap is a no-brainer for the Cubs. I don’t get it.[/quote]I think those folks don’t realize that one guy is making more money than the other when they might suck equally despite one having more power potential.

Now if the Rockies kicked in the difference in salary, that might be a bit easier to stomach, methinks.

[quote name=josh]The Astros are trying very hard to obtain Andrew Friedman. Sounds like the new owner is trying to emulate the Cubs (or, given their market, the Rays), only they’re doing it right away. I kind of wish Ricketts had started right away. I’m glad Theo happened now rather than not at all, but I don’t know why we had to wait through two shitty seasons first.[/quote]Was there a Theo or Friedman-caliber candidate available when Ricketts bought the team? I assume Josh Byrnes was still floating around (forgot when he got fired).

[quote name=Rice Cube]Was there a Theo or Friedman-caliber candidate available when Ricketts bought the team? I assume Josh Byrnes was still floating around (forgot when he got fired).[/quote]One could argue Theo wasn’t technically “available” this year. It doesn’t matter. Water under the bridge. Done now, moving on.

Apparently the Rockies would rather have Colvin. DeWitt should just hang em up now (dying laughing)

Chris Capuano ——————-> ?????????????

http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2011/12/chris-capuano-agrees-to-terms-with-unknown-team.html

Not sure why Bowden was trying to scoop everybody on this one. If it’s Pujols or Fielder or Reyes, then sure, that they’ve come to terms with somebody is newsworthy. When it’s Chris Capuano, eh, why not wait the extra half hour and figure out who the team he’s agreed to terms with actually is.

[quote name=Berselius]Apparently the Rockies would rather have Colvin. DeWitt should just hang em up now (dying laughing)[/quote]I wonder if this hurts Blake’s HOF chances. He should probably start his amphetamine regimen now.

Crapuano——–> Dodgers, 2/10M

[quote name=josh]I don’t know. Maybe. Did he even try? In general, though, there must have been a GM that was available. Has Ricketts just been sitting there this whole time lusting after Theo and no one else? If so, then maybe you’re right. I was thinking more generally that he would have been able to get SOMEONE good, say, Friedman (I honestly have no idea if that’s any more realistic, just an example), by offering the President job he gave to Theo.[/quote]
Someone good? Theo is better than someone good. Hendry was easily the best and most successful GM the Cubs had in my lifetime. I would consider him to have been, on the whole, a “good” GM. Theo is on another level.

Seriously, fuck the last two years. We have one of the best front offices in the game right now. Sure, I would’ve loved if the Trib had canned Hendry after the 2005 season and gone out and thrown a net over Theo in his gorilla suit on Halloween, but they didn’t. Or better yet, seen what the Red Sox saw in him going into the 2003 season and stole him away while Lucchino and Henry were waiting on Beane, but they didn’t. It took however long it did to finally figure it the fuck out but the Cubs (under Ticketts) finally did. That it happened in 2011 rather in 2009 isn’t going mean shit two or three years from now when the Cubs are the class of the NL.

Cespedes —————> north of 50MM to sign

http://espn.go.com/mlb/hotstove11/story/_/id/7303390/highly-touted-cuban-outfielder-available-taking

At what point is the cost too prohibitive on this guy?

[quote name=8volumesthick]That point[/quote]
(dying laughing)

[quote name=Aisle424]There is a master plan in place. Patience.[/quote]Does it include Paul Lynde and/or Alice the housekeeper in the center square?

[quote name=work sucks]Crapuano——–> Dodgers, 2/10M[/quote]Thank DeRosa he’s not coming to the Cubs.

Caupuano isn’t terrible; he had a good strikeout rate last year and a decent walk rate.

[quote name=WaLi]I’m pretty sure on of the questions the BBWA ask themselves while considering HOF candidates is “Have you ever been passed on for Tyler Colvin”. If the answer is Yes, then you are automatically disqualified.[/quote]Hmm hm. I see. That’s definitely going to make it tougher for him.

Heath Bell after seeing how much money he’ll get:

$50 million is too much for my liking for a guy who is 26 and played in a league that was about equal to A ball.

I hope your wife’s ankle is feeling better, MB.

http://www.thereader.es/spain-news-stories/7412-British-woman-discovers-dangers-of-holiday-sex.html

[quote name=WaLi]http://www.thepostgame.com/blog/dish/201112/new-red-sox-manager-bobby-valentines-odd-food-invention

(dying laughing)[/quote]See my avatar for an image of this hilarity.

[quote name=Snyds01]do they mean right? [/quote]correct.

[quote name=Rice Cube]http://hardballtalk.nbcsports.com/2011/12/02/magic-johnson-stan-kasten-teaming-up-to-bid-on-the-dodgers/

Someone should do a genetic profiling experiment on Magic Johnson to find out how he is still alive after contracting HIV. Those are some magical resistance genes he has.[/quote]The antiretroviral drugs have proven extremely effective for people who aren’t at the full AIDS stage. If you have the money, you can live a long ass time with HIV these days.

[quote name=Snyds01]http://insider.espn.go.com/mlb/story/_/id/7291374/mlb-justin-upton-leads-top-50-list-mlb-players-age-25

Check out #6!!*

*insider required[/quote]
Are you feeling charitable today?

/not an insider

I don’t think you paid them enough to not talk, MB.

I lied…

Other guys I like going forward, just not enough to rank in the top 50: Jose Altuve, Travis Snider, Jon Niese, Ben Revere, Michael Brantley, Jordan Lyles, Jason Kipnis, Mike Moustakas, Andrew Cashner.

[quote name=josh]I’m pretty sure they made that promise under duress.[/quote]Not to mention courts don’t enforce contracts to perform illegal activities.

Chris Bosio ———-> pitching coach.

new shit http://www.obstructedview.net/chicago-cubs/articles/chris-bosio-to-be-cubs-pitching-coach.html