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  • Cheatingiest Cheating Cheater

    Barry Bonds was sentenced today.

    The Barry Bonds case is over. Bonds, as we speak, is being sentenced. The penalty: 30 days of house arrest, two years of probation and 250 hours of community service.  This, by the way, is what the probation office recommended. Prosecutors were seeking a 15 month jail term.

    Meanwhile, the US government wasted millions of our dollars. Just ask yourself which is worse: some overpaid athlete taking steroids and lying about it or your government wasting your dollars?

    Cheatingiest cheating cheater is not in reference to Bonds. It’s in reference to your government wasting your dollars. I couldn’t care less about Barry Bonds. Yes, he obstructed justice and if the cost wasn’t so damn outrageous trying him would have made perfect sense. However, at some point someone more intelligent than the most intelligent person in the US Government has to step in and wonder whether spending millions of dollars is worth it. There has to be a point at which you just say fuck it. It simply isn’t worth it. It’s unfortunate that point is not at the amount it spent on Bonds. They’re doing the same shit with Roger Clemens.

    Where’s the outrage about the government wasting this money? At the very least people should be outright enraged that the prosecution only managed one conviction and that conviction has been given a stay until an appeal is heard. It’s a god damn miracle our government can convict anybody.


    dmick89
    When I awoke, the Dire Wolf, six hundred pounds of sin, Was grinning at my window, all I said was "Come on in"
    dmick89
    JOT: Cubs Minor League Recap 5-17-13 http://t.co/gGHVijialf - 12 hours ago
    dmick89
    Contact me here

    259 Responses to “Cheatingiest Cheating Cheater”

    1. 1 Mish says:

      My facebook status as of 20 minutes ago:

      I, for one, am glad that the ruthless, vile Barry Bonds was sentenced today. I mean, the sheer immorality of lying about freely sticking a needle in your butt to hit a leather ball over a wall is just unforgivable. Pol Pot’s got nothing on this guy.

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    2. 3 GW says:

      [quote name=Smokestack Lightning]Not to resurrect anybody’s hopes here, but Jim Bowden, who earlier was the loudest crowing about the Jays winning the Darvish sweeps…deleted the original tweet.

      http://twitter.com/#!/JimBowdenESPNxm/status/147646968397697024

      He has since tweeted that the Commish’s office hasn’t told anybody anything about nothing to do with Darvish, and won’t, thank you very much, until Nippon Ham accepts the bid.

      http://twitter.com/#!/JimBowdenESPNxm/status/147739078572515328/quote

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    3. 4 josh says:

      Agree 1,000%. I’d agree 10,000%, but this is America, and 1,000% is the maximum amount to agree, by convention.

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    4. 5 ACT says:

      Where’s the outrage about the government wasting this money?

      All over the place? Seriously, every comment thread I’ve seen about Bonds and Clemens has quite a few complaints about how the government is wasting money.

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    5. 6 WenningtonsGorillaCock says:

      [quote name=ACT]All over the place? Seriously, every comment thread I’ve seen about Bonds and Clemens has quite a few complaints about how the government is wasting money.[/quote]The government wastes money?

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    6. 8 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=josh]Agree 1,000%. I’d agree 10,000%, but this is America, and 1,000% is the maximum amount to agree, by convention.[/quote]
      Not if you take steroids. You can agree way more if you take steroids.

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    7. 9 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=Berselius]I bet you etched our bid on a Faberge egg to send it in.[/quote]
      False. I sent it on the back of our rare first draft of the Constitution with the word “suckers” in it.

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    8. 10 mb21 says:

      [quote name=ACT]All over the place? Seriously, every comment thread I’ve seen about Bonds and Clemens has quite a few complaints about how the government is wasting money.[/quote]Not according to ABC News. Not according to half the blogs on the internet. Not according to most of the BBWAA members.

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    9. 11 Mish says:

      Wow. Listened to 5 minutes of Sullivan and Kaplan on CTL. On top of the unprovoked vitriol thrown at Ramirez and Zambrano, they completely misunderstand the trade vales of Byrd and Soto. It’ll bring you back a fungo bat, they say. I’m switching to an awful Simpsons from 2002.

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    10. 12 mb21 says:

      Did McQueary contradict his grand jury testimony today?

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    11. 15 26.2cubsfan says:

      [quote name=GW]http://twitter.com/#!/castrovince/status/147827225121669120[/quote]
      Sweet deal!!

      https://www.google.com/#hl=en&cp=14&gs_id=2e&xhr=t&q=37+million+yen&tok=I_7vH5StAo_r9hRaIjqM0Q&pf=p&sclient=psy-ab&source=hp&pbx=1&oq=37+million+yen&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.,cf.osb&fp=359205c34a685e6e&biw=1280&bih=620

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    12. 17 ACT says:

      Not crazy about Maholm. He’s coming off a decent year, but his velocity and swinging strike% were at all-time lows. Also, He’s always struggled against right-handed hitting.

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    13. 18 josh says:

      [quote name=ACT]Not crazy about Maholm. He’s coming off a decent year, but his velocity and swinging strike% were at all-time lows. Also, He’s always struggled against right-handed hitting.[/quote]He always just seemed to me like a lefty who in any given game was just about to give up a lot of runs.

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    14. 19 josh says:

      Too bad we can’t get in on some of that sweet, sweet Ronny Cedeno action.

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    15. 20 Rodrigo says:

      Any news on Oswalt or Edwin Jackson? Both seem like better options.

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    16. 21 Berselius says:

      I don’t know what’s funnier, that the Brewers are considering Cedeno or that he could be an upgrade over Yuni. (dying laughing).

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    17. 22 mb21 says:

      [quote name=josh]He always just seemed to me like a lefty who in any given game was just about to give up a lot of runs.[/quote]That’s anyone other than a handful of pitchers.

      Maholm isn’t bad. He’s not good. He’s probably about average. For the right price I’d be happy to have him.

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    18. 23 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Berselius]I don’t know what’s funnier, that the Brewers are considering Cedeno or that he could be an upgrade over Yuni. (dying laughing).[/quote]According to most saber-leaning blogs I’ve read, just about anything is an upgrade over Yuni.

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    19. 24 mb21 says:

      I’ve actually read on a few places today people suggesting the right punishment for Bonds was death. Just wow.

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    20. 25 mb21 says:

      The funny thing about Yuni is that this the first comment I ever remember writing about him.

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    21. 26 Rice Cube says:

      I think I looked at this Bonds sentence and laughed. It was like the judge wanted to throw the prosecution a bone but with the message that they were retarded for wasting everyone’s time with this trial.

      As I’ve said before, as a Bay Area native and growing up following the Giants before I knew too much about baseball, it was awesome to watch Bonds just be really really good at baseball. You didn’t even have to understand the game’s intricacies to realize that Bonds was good at it. Hell, I didn’t even know what OBP was back then and I knew that being on base 60% of the time was really fucking badass. I was also immune to the steroid crap by then because I knew McGwire was taking a non-banned steroid substance (androstenedione) and 700-foot homers were awesome. I don’t consider myself an expert but I feel like you have to be pretty good at baseball already before taking steroids to get McGwire, Sosa, or Bondsian numbers. This whole thing was a waste of time and money. Maybe I wasn’t able to grow up in the innocent times when players were racist or throwing games or spitting on baseballs or taking amphetamines, but Barry Bonds was exciting to watch. I’m glad he got such a light sentence because hopefully it will signal to the government that they should probably stop wasting so much time and money to slap Bonds on the wrist for using bad analgesic cream or whatever he did to hit 10 more homers a season than he otherwise would have.

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    22. 27 Rice Cube says:

      I admit I’m a bit biased because I really liked Bonds as a player (he was an asshole but he was good at baseball).

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    23. 28 Bottleasmoke says:

      Given what I’ve seen about the writers and teammates he was reputed to have been an asshole too it’s hard to judge him. If I had to share space with Jeff Kent and BBWA people it would be a Herculean effect to not go on a killing spree, it could be the strength afforded Bonds by PEDs saved a few lives.

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    24. 29 ACT says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]I admit I’m a bit biased because I really liked Bonds as a player (he was an asshole but he was good at baseball).[/quote]Same here. I liked him better than Griffey (who cares about likeability?)

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    25. 30 ACT says:

      I also liked Kevin Brown and Roger Clemens.

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    26. 31 Rice Cube says:

      I recall being pissed off every time they intentionally walked Bonds. I forgot how many times the IBB actually worked for the other team but it was still annoying.

      I also remember one time when the bases were loaded and the Giants were down two with two outs, and the opposing manager (I want to say it was Buck Showalter) actually walked Bonds to force in a run. The Giants lost, but that was how scared people were of Bonds back then and I was actually okay with that IBB.

      /cool stories bro

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    27. 32 ACT says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]I recall being pissed off every time they intentionally walked Bonds. I forgot how many times the IBB actually worked for the other team but it was still annoying.[/quote]Tango did a study on when to walk Bonds:

      http://www.tangotiger.net/walkbondschart.html
      http://www.tangotiger.net/walkbondschart2.html

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    28. 33 josh says:

      Just facebooking with a lawyer friend. I guess the whole reason Congress was involved, according to him, was that the Supreme Court declared MLB to be immune from antitrust lawsuits, then later, they tried to patch that up by passing a law that said Congress could fix baseball if it needed to. In other words, we have a Depression Era court to blame for Barry Bonds getting grounded (presumable, without dinner).

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    29. 34 ACT says:

      [quote name=mb21]That’s anyone other than a handful of pitchers.

      Maholm isn’t bad. He’s not good. He’s probably about average. For the right price I’d be happy to have him.[/quote]I think he’s below average at this point, especially since his fastball lost about 2 mph over the last 2 years. I don’t mind the Cubs going after him, but I wonder if he won’t be overpriced following after a “good” 2011. Then again, He’s had recent injury struggles, so he may come at a discount.

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    30. 35 ACT says:

      To put it another way, the Cubs’ other 2 acquisitions are “buy low” candidates, coming off bad years and likely to bounce back somewhat. In Maholm’s case, I think he’s probably worse than his 2011 numbers.

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    31. 36 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=ACT]Tango did a study on when to walk Bonds:

      http://www.tangotiger.net/walkbondschart.html
      http://www.tangotiger.net/walkbondschart2.html/quoteThe “WALK, NOW” situations are pretty obvious, it seems (dying laughing)

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    32. 37 Rice Cube says:

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    33. 38 Rice Cube says:

      Oh shit (dying laughing)

      Oh that’s not right (dying laughing)

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    34. 39 Rice Cube says:

      Haven’t been following this story as closely as some, but this might amuse those of you who do:

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    35. 41 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      What happens in the posting process if 2 teams tie for the highest bid? (dying laughing)

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    36. 42 ACT says:

      [quote name=Recalcitrant Blogger Nate]What happens in the posting process if 2 teams tie for the highest bid? (dying laughing)[/quote]They follow King Solomon’s example. They offer to split him in half and deliver him to both teams. Whichever team steps up and says, “Don’t do that; give him to the other team,” wins.

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    37. 43 fang2415 says:

      [quote name=ACT]They follow King Solomon’s example. They offer to split him in half and deliver him to both teams. Whichever team steps up and says, “Don’t do that; give him to the other team,” wins.[/quote]That only happens if the Jews really do win the bid.

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    38. 44 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Recalcitrant Blogger Nate]What happens in the posting process if 2 teams tie for the highest bid? (dying laughing)[/quote]Ninja battle atop Mt Fuji.

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    39. 45 Berselius says:

      Rollins ———–> resigning with Philly

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    40. 46 Berselius says:

      Latos ———–> Cincy
      Alonso, Grandal, Volquez, Boxberger ———-> SD

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    41. 47 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=Berselius]Latos ———–> Cincy
      Alonso, Grandal, Volquez, Boxberger ———-> SD[/quote]
      Holy motherfucking shit.

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    42. 48 Mish says:

      [quote name=Berselius]Latos ———–> Cincy
      Alonso, Grandal, Volquez, Boxberger ———-> SD[/quote]Wowza.

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    43. 49 Aisle424 says:

      The Reds obviously smell an opportunity to leapfrog the Brewers and Cardinals. They may not be done since this move alone probably doesn’t do it.

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    44. 50 Suburban kid 2 or 288 says:

      Rudy J is a craggy looking fucker.

      Also, Reds ———> Win Now

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    45. 51 Berselius says:

      That’s a great move for the Reds. Their window is wide open.

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    46. 52 Berselius says:

      That Rollins deal is 3/33 (4/44 if an easy vesting option is obtained). fan fucking tastic deal for the Phillies

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    47. 53 Rodrigo says:

      Reds gave up a ton of talent. Seems like a bit much for Latos.

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    48. 54 GW says:

      [quote name=Rodrigo]Reds gave up a ton of talent. Seems like a bit much for Latos.[/quote]
      that’s my knee-jerk reaction, as well.

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    49. 55 Rodrigo says:

      [quote name=GW]that’s my knee-jerk reaction, as well.[/quote]
      If that were the haul for Garza, would that have been a good deal for the Cubs?

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    50. 56 GW says:

      [quote name=Rodrigo]If that were the haul for Garza, would that have been a good deal for the Cubs?[/quote]
      yes. but garza has fewer years of club control left than latos, i think.

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    51. 57 GW says:

      wouldn’t be surprised to see the cubs go after rizzo and/or blanks now.

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    52. 59 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=GW]yes. but garza has fewer years of club control left than latos, i think.[/quote]Latos hasn’t even entered his first arb year. I think I saw they have 4 years of club control left on him.

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    53. 60 GBTS says:

      Latos has struggled with injuries for a while. I really think he’s prime for a Josh Johnson type jump.

      Really good trade for the Reds.

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    54. 61 GBTS says:

      Also, b, I see all your hours of hard work have finally paid off. Congratulations.

      http://www.nature.com/news/ostrich-penis-clears-up-evolutionary-mystery-1.9600

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    55. 62 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      Yea looks to me like SD wins that one. They get 2 regular position players and an arm for the rotation. Great move for them IMO.

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    56. 63 Berselius says:

      [quote name=GBTS]Also, b, I see all your hours of hard work have finally paid off. Congratulations.

      http://www.nature.com/news/ostrich-penis-clears-up-evolutionary-mystery-1.9600/quote
      I worked long and hard on that one.

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    57. 64 Berselius says:

      [quote name=Recalcitrant Blogger Nate]Yea looks to me like SD wins that one. They get 2 regular position players and an arm for the rotation. Great move for them IMO.[/quote]
      I think it’s a great move for both teams. None of those guys were going to help the Reds win a pennant anytime soon, and Latos will be around for a while. Given the 1B drain from the division and the Cubs apparent unwillingness to spend their time is now. I don’t see the Cardinals doing much of anything either, despite the money they were offering Pujols. I would have thought that they would go hard after Jimmy Rollins rather than sign the shadow of Rafael Furcal.

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    58. 65 Mish says:

      [quote name=Berselius]I think it’s a great move for both teams. .[/quote]That’s how I see it.

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    59. 66 mb21 says:

      I also think it’s a nice move for both teams. Helps SD out when they have a chance to contend down the road and helps Cincy out now. I’d have been happy with Alonso and one of the others for Garza.

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    60. 69 Berselius says:

      [quote name=mb21]http://espn.go.com/chicago/mlb/story/_/id/7362909/sources-chicago-cubs-continue-pursue-free-agent-prince-fielder[/quote]
      It could go either way

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    61. 70 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      [quote name=mb21]http://espn.go.com/chicago/mlb/story/_/id/7362909/sources-chicago-cubs-continue-pursue-free-agent-prince-fielder[/quote]
      this is getting to be some 1984 shit. the only reason you repeatedly deny a rumor like this is if there is some truth to it. you also don’t let reports out that you made a significant bid for darvish out if you have no money to spend. I figure they’re going after 1 of darvish/fielder, and they have to wait and see which way the darvish domino falls.

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    62. 71 Rice Cube says:

      The media and rumors keep swinging wildly back and forth. It’s like they’re using Prince Fielder like a really heavy pendulum.

      Actually, now that I have that image in my head, I’m thinking wrecking ball is more appropriate.

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    63. 72 mb21 says:

      I think it’s Scott Boras. He’s been known to invent to offers and interested teams. Surprised he hasn’t named 33 teams interested in Fielder.

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    64. 73 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=mb21]I think it’s Scott Boras. He’s been known to invent to offers and interested teams. Surprised he hasn’t named 33 teams interested in Fielder.[/quote]Were the I-Cubs, Smokies and Chiefs also interested?

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    65. 74 Rice Cube says:

      This new Joe Poz blog was a fun read:

      http://joeposnanski.si.com/2011/12/17/hollas-and-tebow/

      Tebow can look helpless in ways that few quarterbacks ever have. He can’t throw from the pocket. His release takes roughly the same time it took Bob Ross to paint a landscape. He has Nerf-Football-In-The-Wind accuracy, meaning he will often hit a Starbucks with his passes but he won’t necessarily hit the Starbucks he’s aiming for (and meaning that his bad passes are SO bad, he doesn’t often get them intercepted — he’s thrown just two picks all year despite completing fewer than 50% of his passes).

      Nice.

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    66. 75 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]Were the I-Cubs, Smokies and Chiefs also interested?[/quote]I don’t know. Didn’t Boras already say something like 10 teams had made offers? I think he made that comment right after the meetings. I don’t doubt that 10 teams made an offer. I doubt that 10 teams offered more than $30 million total. I’d say that was probably 4 or 5 teams. In my opinion, the market for Prince Fielder is Seattle and that’s it. I think Milwaukee would re-sign him for the right price. The Cubs probably would as well. My guess is that Fielder’s value would have to come down to about 5 years and $100 million for the Cubs to be serious about acquiring him.

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    67. 76 Rice Cube says:

      I think I am going by the Ken Rosenthal school of logic where if you look at the teams that actually make sense, you automatically exclude the entire NL Central except for the Cubs, you exclude all the cheapskate franchises, and you exclude the Yankees, Red Sox and Phillies because they already have expensive 1B and Fielder won’t DH for a while.

      I think the Marlins already took their name out of the hat, as did STL (as mentioned above because they wouldn’t overpay for Fielder if they couldn’t keep Pujols) and MIL (who signed Ramirez and don’t seem like they have the money to spend). The Angels got Pujols and won’t need Fielder. That really leaves the Mariners (they’re interested for whatever reason), the Rangers (who I don’t think are desperate because the core of their team looks pretty good already), maybe the Blue Jays, and the Cubs. I don’t think there is a dark horse candidate out there. The Giants are probably going to put their resources into extending their pitching staff. The Dodgers can’t pay for shit. The Mets are in financial ruin. The Braves have Freddie Freeman. I thought the Nats signed Adam LaRoche but I haven’t really paid attention.

      At this point I am inclined to agree with you that the only team who is desperate enough to overpay is the Mariners. The Cubs don’t have any pressure because they know they are probably going to suck without a whole lot of good fortune with or without Fielder, so they can afford to wait it out. If they get Fielder on their terms, it’s obviously a win for the Cubs. If they act as a smokescreen to drive up the price that Seattle or whoever else has to pay, assuming that no other NL Central team gets him, he’s out of the division and the team that signed Fielder is financially restricted for a few years.

      It’s actually not a bad situation to be in. It’d be nice if the Cubs got Fielder, but I don’t think I’d be too disappointed if he goes somewhere else because it’s most likely not going to be in the NLC.

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    68. 77 mb21 says:

      I think I am going by the Ken Rosenthal school of logic where if you look at the teams that actually make sense, you automatically exclude the entire NL Central except for the Cubs, you exclude all the cheapskate franchises, and you exclude the Yankees, Red Sox and Phillies because they already have expensive 1B and Fielder won’t DH for a while.

      I wouldn’t exclude the Cardinals, but that’s only because they have a bunch of money to spend. I think it’s much more likely they sign Fielder than it is the Cubs do. That being said, i don’t think the Cardinals sign him. I think the Dodgers are a possibility, but it’s not likely.

      I think any team in the AL is more likely than the NL. Fielder may be able to stand at 1st base the next year or two, but in a couple years it will be like he’s in a lawn chair. He’s one of those guys that would be more valuable if he never played the field. He’s that bad defensively. Fielder is a DH right now. In my opinion, putting him at 1st base is playing him out of position. It’s like signing an average fielding 1B and moving him to LF or RF.

      I’d be happy to have Fielder’s bat in the lineup, but it’s an adventure with him in the field.

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    69. 78 Rice Cube says:

      I agree with you that Fielder sucks at defense. I didn’t mean that he wasn’t a DH yet, I meant that it sounds like Fielder doesn’t want to be a DH yet. Semantics (dying laughing)

      I think the Dodgers are too messed up and probably not allowed to pay that much for Fielder although I was surprised they were allowed to pay so much to extend Matt Kemp. I guess I don’t understand how bankruptcy works.

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    70. 79 Berselius says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube] I guess I don’t understand how bankruptcy works.[/quote]
      It’s pretty easy

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    71. 80 Smokestack Lightning says:

      [quote name=GW]wouldn’t be surprised to see the cubs go after rizzo and/or blanks now.[/quote]
      http://www.csnchicago.com/blog/cubs-talk/post/Cubs-may-have-interest-in-Padres-Rizzo?blockID=614300&feedID=10336

      Do the Cubs even have the parts to get this guy?

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    72. 81 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Smokestack Lightning]http://www.csnchicago.com/blog/cubs-talk/post/Cubs-may-have-interest-in-Padres-Rizzo?blockID=614300&feedID=10336

      Do the Cubs even have the parts to get this guy?[/quote]They can make a Franken-Cub with the speed of Tony Campana, the glovework of Darwin Barney, and whatever they can cobble up in terms of OBP with the rest of the no-name prospects.

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    73. 82 Rice Cube says:
    74. 84 josh says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]Holy bid madness!

      http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2011/12/winning-darvish-bid-exceeds-matsuzakas-record.html/quoteI definitely don’t think it was the Cubs, then. I just don’t see them dropping this kind of dough right now.

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    75. 85 ACT says:

      I still think it’s the Blue Jays.

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    76. 86 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]Holy bid madness!

      http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2011/12/winning-darvish-bid-exceeds-matsuzakas-record.html/quote
      Supposedly Blue Jays made a monster offer. I still wouldn’t be surprised to see Theo win bid.

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    77. 87 Smokestack Lightning says:

      [quote name=ACT]I still think it’s the Blue Jays.[/quote]
      Nah, this isn’t the Jays anymore.

      It’s Theo.

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    78. 88 ACT says:

      Watching a cricket match on ESPN3. Even though it’s in English, I have no idea what’s going on.

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    79. 89 ACT says:

      Hey I’m starting to get the hang of this game! The crickets are loaded, the count’s three crickets and two anti-crickets and the infield cricket rule is in effect, right?

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    80. 90 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=ACT]Hey I’m starting to get the hang of this game! The crickets are loaded, the count’s three crickets and two anti-crickets and the infield cricket rule is in effect, right?[/quote]BLERN

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    81. 91 ACT says:

      Bangladesh leads 240-1 in the first innings.

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    82. 92 ACT says:

      Make that 240-5.

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    83. 93 ACT says:

      Unless I’m misreading that (probably).

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    84. 94 ACT says:

      240 is definitely Bangladesh’s score. Not sure what the 5 is.

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    85. 95 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=ACT]Not sure what the 5 is.[/quote]That’s the number of people who actually might give a shit.

      Which is still more than the number of Tampa Bay fans.

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    86. 96 ACT says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]That’s the number of people who actually might give a shit.

      Which is still more than the number of Tampa Bay fans.[/quote]The stadium crown certainly reminds me of a Rays game.

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    87. 97 ACT says:

      Someone hit a home run.

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    88. 98 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=ACT]Someone hit a home run.[/quote]Six runs!

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    89. 99 ACT says:

      [quote name=ACT]The stadium crown certainly reminds me of a Rays game.[/quote]Crowd, I mean.

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    90. 100 Bottleasmoke says:

      Since I don’t have a tv, I follow an alarming number of sporting events through this blog – to be honest reading y’alls comments is usually far more entertaining than network sports coverage – this cricket commentary is a new level of awesome! Please, sir, some more!

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    91. 101 ACT says:

      Lots of pitches in the dirt so far. Carlos Marmol would love this game.

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    92. 102 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=ACT]Lots of pitches in the dirt so far. Carlos Marmol would love this game.[/quote]That’s actually the “bowling” technique. They do their best to crank the ball into the ground as much as possible so it spins weird, misses the bat and crashes into the wicket. That’s what I learned from playing with the Indians and New Zealanders in club cricket.

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    93. 103 ACT says:

      On screen: Run rate: 3.27 runs per over

      Wow! What the hell does that mean?

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    94. 104 ACT says:

      Partnership 48 runs from 116 balls

      So, these guys score a lot. More than the Yankees on a good day.

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    95. 105 ACT says:

      Still haven’t seen an out yet. What do those look like?

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    96. 106 ACT says:

      Crowd is described as “well-behaved.” I take that as a euphemism for “bored.”

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    97. 107 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=ACT]Still haven’t seen an out yet. What do those look like?[/quote]An out should occur if a batted ball is snagged in the air, if a bowled ball hits the wicket because the batsman wasn’t able to protect, or if a runner is tagged out before he is able to get back to the wicket safe zone.

      As for “overs”, those are basically a set of pitches and I never actually figured out how that was determined.

      Cricket is weird.

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    98. 108 ACT says:

      Audience/athlete reactions are just the opposite of baseball. Mild applause when a run scores. Then, OH MY GOD, DID THAT GUY JUST GET OUT! HE ALMOST MADE AN OUT! WOW!

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    99. 109 ACT says:

      THERE WAS ALMOST AN OUT BUT THE UMPIRE RULED AGAINST IT! AMAZING!

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    100. 110 Rice Cube says:

      Holy shit, they have replay review in cricket?

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    101. 111 ACT says:

      They’re taking a break for lunch now.

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    102. 112 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=ACT]They’re taking a break for lunch now.[/quote]I bet it’s better than a cup of Gatorade and some sunflower seeds.

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    103. 113 ACT says:

      For some reason, “innings” is both singular and plural. Of all the differences between baseball and cricket, I think this is the one I find hardest to adjust to.

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    104. 114 Rice Cube says:

      Simon Pegg used a cricket bat to pummel zombies to death in “Shaun of the Dead”…I think most Americans can relate to that.

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    105. 115 Berselius says:

      Padres interested in a deal centered around Rizzo and Garza

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    106. 116 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Berselius]Padres interested in a deal centered around Rizzo and Garza[/quote]I like it.

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    107. 117 Berselius says:

      [quote name=mb21]I like it.[/quote]
      Me too – multiple cost-controlled years of a LH power-hitting 1B? Yes please.

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    108. 118 Berselius says:

      I never liked Alonso but like what I see of Rizzo. Could just be the difference in volume of experience though (dying laughing).

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    109. 119 Berselius says:

      I don’t see why SD would want Garza though. They won as many games as the Cubs did last year.

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    110. 121 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Berselius]I don’t see why SD would want Garza though. They won as many games as the Cubs did last year.[/quote]It wouldn’t be a Garza for Rizzo straight up deal. It would be Garza and a few others. I can’t imagine acquiring Rizzo without giving up one McNutt or Brett Jackson. Or both.

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    111. 122 Berselius says:

      [quote = misattributed tweeter]My issue with all of this is why would SD negate prospect gain to get older, more costly SP that they can’t keep?[/quote]
      Pretty much

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    112. 123 mb21 says:

      The Padres could and most likely would trade Matt Garza. This is something that I think would be a 3-team trade. Padres get a shitload of prospects from the Cubs and a third team while the third team gets Garza and the Cubs get Rizzo.

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    113. 124 Berselius says:

      Love the new avatar mb

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    114. 125 Berselius says:

      I don’t see the Cubs trading Garza if it’s a net loss of prospects, unless the other guys going along are the likes of Lemahieu

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    115. 126 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Berselius]Love the new avatar mb[/quote]That scene where Jesse was introduced to the super lab was hilarious.

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    116. 127 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Berselius]I don’t see the Cubs trading Garza if it’s a net loss of prospects, unless the other guys going along are the likes of Lemahieu[/quote]Yeah, I don’t either.

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    117. 128 Berselius says:

      Alonso was ranked 73, Rizzo was 75 in the last BA top 100

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    118. 129 mb21 says:

      I thought Rizzo was higher for some reason. Rizzo had a great season in AAA. Alonso’s was similar to his career average. Rizzo sucked at the MLB level while Alonso hit like an MVP in his 100 PA. Rizzo is younger. I don’t think Garza is close to enough to acquire a 21 year old 1B with the kind of power that Rizzo has shown.

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    119. 130 ACT says:

      Epstein has a game plan

      The Cubs were everyone’s mystery team this offseason. They were supposed to be in on Albert Pujols. Uh, not really. They were supposed to be in on Yu Darvish (yes, but a major league source indicated they made a very low bid and have no illusions of winning the post), and now they’re supposed to be in on Prince Fielder.

      Things could change, but as of this writing the Cubs were still in the mode of, let’s not spend until we’re ready to spend and right now we’re not ready to spend.

      There appears to be the perception that because Theo Epstein spent a lot of money on free agents in Boston, he will do the same in Chicago. Maybe in time he will, but his focus in addition to improving the team is revamping the farm system.

      In order to do that you need players. You need draft choices.

      Judging by the nastiness of the tweets and e-mails from Chicago, the Cubs fan base is no longer the mild-mannered, just-happy-to-go-to-Wrigley following it perhaps was once upon a time. They want a winner. Unfortunately, some fans equated Epstein’s arrival with instant winning. Doesn’t work that way.

      Epstein didn’t inherit a great situation and his first order of business is to try to get out from under it, hoping to lose some of the big contracts that weigh down the franchise. Improve Carlos Zambrano’s value? Of course. Make it so Alfonso Soriano is at least somewhat attractive to another contending team? That’s the goal. Bid adieu to Aramis Ramirez? Done.

      Possibly deal pitcher Matt Garza, probably Chicago’s biggest asset, for a boatload of good young players? Why not. This is the way you rebuild your organization. Epstein has a plan to retool and he appears to be sticking with it.

      Now, owner Tom Ricketts could always intervene and order Epstein to sign Fielder, but that’s not why he hired him. Ricketts hired Epstein to do the job and put together the team his way.

      http://www.boston.com/sports/baseball/redsox/articles/2011/12/18/red_sox_have_more_competition_than_ever/?page=full

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    120. 131 Aisle424 says:

      If the Reds just traded Alonso who was #73 plus and bunch of other guys who sound like they are highly regarded for Latos, surely Rizzo for Garza straight up isn’t totally ridiculous.

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    121. 132 Berselius says:

      [quote name=Aisle424]If the Reds just traded Alonso who was #73 plus and bunch of other guys who sound like they are highly regarded for Latos, surely Rizzo for Garza straight up isn’t totally ridiculous.[/quote]
      They have a potential ROY in Volquez

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    122. 133 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      I always thought SD was a logical landing spot for Zambrano. Obviously not for RIzzo, but if the Cubs eat enough or take back a contract (say, Hudson?), SD could extract value from Zambrano with that park.

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    123. 134 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      I’d say if the Cubs trade Garza, it will be a 3-team trade with Texas and SD where Tex gets Garza, Cubs get Rizzo, +, SD gets prospects. Don’t know how that would work though.

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    124. 135 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Recalcitrant Blogger Nate]I’d say if the Cubs trade Garza, it will be a 3-team trade with Texas and SD where Tex gets Garza, Cubs get Rizzo, +, SD gets prospects. Don’t know how that would work though.[/quote]Yeah, I think a 3-team trade is the only way the Cubs are trading Garza and acquiring Rizzo.

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    125. 136 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      Apparently Toronto was also trying to get Latos. I’d try to trade Garza to them. They have a really good farm system. They are apparently trying really hard to improve; between Darvish, Latos, and possibly Fielder.

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    126. 137 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      Bleacher Nation says Garza-Rizzo trade is being discussed, and adds this:

      UPDATE: Some of the other names I’m hearing bounced around in the talks include Orlando Hudson, Casey Kelly, Keyvius Sampson, Simon Castro, Jedd Gyorko, Robbie Erlin, and Joe Weiland. Obviously the Cubs wouldn’t be getting all of them (or even most). These are just some of the names that the Cubs are interested in, or – in Hudson’s case – that the Padres want to ship back to the Cubs.

      I’m guessing the Cubs trade Garza and get back Rizzo and some type of pitcher. I can also see them taking back Hudson to offset cost. They may also have to throw someone else in there.

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    127. 138 mb21 says:

      If the Cubs get Rizzo for only Garza I’ll be impressed. I just don’t see how that’s going to happen.

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    128. 139 mb21 says:

      I suppose I could see Rizzo and Hudson for Garza, but I still think that’s not likely either.

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    129. 140 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      [quote name=mb21]I suppose I could see Rizzo and Hudson for Garza, but I still think that’s not likely either.[/quote]
      I don’t think the Cubs would trade Garza without getting some kind of pitcher in return, but I could be wrong. Garza is a valuable piece. When the Yankees and Rangers were rumored to be interested, it seemed like the Cubs wanted a pitching prospect and a position player prospect. Not sure though. Garza will be paid 9M and maybe 11M for the next 2 years, but he was a 5WAR pitcher this year. That’s 15M surplus for 2012. I’d say the Padres would acquire Garza and then shop him to get something for the future.

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    130. 141 Rice Cube says:

      I like the three-team trade idea. What does Texas have that the Padres would want?

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    131. 142 Mish says:

      While I agree that Rizzo is a balls prospect (and I like Simon Castro too), I think Theo would want to get multiple assets for Garza. It’s not only quality that the Cubs lack, but quantity. I think he’d like to get a few players back from Garza. But that’s just my conjecture.

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    132. 143 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Recalcitrant Blogger Nate]I don’t think the Cubs would trade Garza without getting some kind of pitcher in return, but I could be wrong. Garza is a valuable piece. When the Yankees and Rangers were rumored to be interested, it seemed like the Cubs wanted a pitching prospect and a position player prospect. Not sure though. Garza will be paid 9M and maybe 11M for the next 2 years, but he was a 5WAR pitcher this year. That’s 15M surplus for 2012. I’d say the Padres would acquire Garza and then shop him to get something for the future.[/quote]I think if Thoyer is expecting that much for Garza then they’ve overestimated his value. Trading Garza straight up for Yonder Alonso would have been a fair trade for both teams. Considering Alonso played significantly better at the MLB level he has more value. Some have said the Cubs asking price for Garza is too high so I’m going to guess that he doesn’t get traded.

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    133. 144 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Mish]While I agree that Rizzo is a balls prospect (and I like Simon Castro too), I think Theo would want to get multiple assets for Garza. It’s not only quality that the Cubs lack, but quantity. I think he’d like to get a few players back from Garza. But that’s just my conjecture.[/quote]They could probably trade him and get the same quantity that they gave up, but it was a package that lacked quality. I’d rather the Cubs get quality in return.

      Garza for Rizzo is a fair trade. I imagine the Padres want more since they have no use for Garza.

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    134. 145 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=mb21]They could probably trade him and get the same quantity that they gave up, but it was a package that lacked quality. I’d rather the Cubs get quality in return.

      Garza for Rizzo is a fair trade. I imagine the Padres want more since they have no use for Garza.[/quote]That suggests that a third party makes the most sense in any potential trade involving those two.

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    135. 146 Smokestack Lightning says:

      Jason McLeod once said Rizzo has the best makeup of anyone he’s ever drafted

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    136. 147 Rice Cube says:

      How fitting if Kyle Orton is the QB who finally defeats the Packers.

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    137. 148 fang2415 says:

      (dying laughing) that I missed the cricket conversation. 240-5 means they’ve scored 240 runs and have made five outs. (I assume the other team hadn’t been up to bat yet.) So you can see why they get more excited about outs than they do about runs.

      Also an “inning” means the time that a batsman spends “in”, i.e. “not out”. So the first time a team bats is its first innings. In a test match each team has two innings (inningses?); I’m not as familiar with other forms, but in one-day cricket I think they just give each team 50 overs each, and 20/20 is 20 overs each?

      An over is six deliveries; after six balls have been bowled, they switch “over” to the other side and change bowlers. Run rate per over is important because unlike baseball there is a limit to how long the games can go so it’s better to score efficiently. (It can actually be hard to fit 40 outs into five days!) Bangladesh being at 240-5 with 3.27 runs per over sounds kinda mediocre to me. Hopefully the bottom of their order doesn’t suck too bad.

      Cricket, like baseball, has more jargon than the all other sports put together, and the exceptions to rules are often more important than the rules. I frequently have to rewind like five times before I understand what the fuck the announcers are talking about. (dying laughing)

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    138. 149 Aisle424 says:

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    139. 150 Rice Cube says:

      ^ I don’t think he’s supposed to bend like that.

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    140. 151 fang2415 says:

      The other crucial discovery that helped me make sense of cricket is that the roles of batter and pitcher are basically the opposite of baseball: in cricket, the batsman stays in until he fucks up, which can be hours if he’s good; and they send a new bowler to face him every few balls.

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    141. 152 fang2415 says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]^ I don’t think he’s supposed to bend like that.[/quote]Depends whose leg that is.

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    142. 153 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=fang2415]Depends whose leg that is.[/quote]It’s his.

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    143. 154 Rice Cube says:

      The Green Bay defense look like amateurs.

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    144. 155 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]The Green Bay defense look like amateurs.[/quote]Shut me right up on that almost-goal line stand.

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    145. 156 fang2415 says:

      [quote name=Aisle424][/quote]

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    146. 157 Rice Cube says:

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    147. 158 Rice Cube says:

      Methinks 1972 Dolphins are getting set to crack open that champagne now.

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    148. 159 Rice Cube says:

      GB —-> can’t shut up Dolphins

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    149. 160 Rice Cube says:

      Tebow and the Broncos are dividing by zero.

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    150. 161 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      I think the dude at Bleacher Nation has some Cubs sources, right? Here’s what he says now:

      UPDATE II: The Cubs are still in active discussions with the Padres, I’m told, but it’s pretty complicated when you’ve got this many parts involved. The Cubs’ most valuable piece is Matt Garza, but the Padres may prefer to get the prospect-equivalent of Garza, rather than the pitcher, himself. That means a third team is necessary, and the Rangers have been involved. Bringing in a third team makes completing an already “complicated” deal a real “pain” (not my words). The two/three sides will continue to discuss a deal until they reach an agreement or seem hopelessly gridlocked. These things tend to take on a life of their own, and the deal could evolve into yet another incarnation. Or, it could just wilt on the vine. With this many players involved and such high stakes, I couldn’t say a deal is more than 50/50 to get done. You’ve also got the Prince Fielder pursuit and Yu Darvish post as a backdrop for these discussions, which only complicates things further. I’m doing my best to get the most complete and reliable information I can, but, given the circumstances and the moving parts, you can understand how the best I can give you is: (1) they’re talking, (2) a trade might be completed soon, (3) or a trade might be completed in a week, and (4) or a trade might be completed never.

      then:

      UPDATE III: I’m told the biggest hold up, from the Cubs’ perspective, is making sure they get the right pitchers/pitching prospects included in the deal. While Rizzo may have been the impetus for the discussions, the Cubs don’t appear to be interested in moving Garza unless some very, very good pitchers/pitching prospects are included. That is to say, Rizzo may not necessarily be “the centerpiece” of a completed deal, such as there is a centerpiece, and such as the sides are actually able to consummate a deal (which, again, remains very much in doubt).

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    151. 162 Suburban kid says:

      Is this a rumor, or does he have a source?

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    152. 163 Recalcitrant Blogger Nate says:

      [quote name=Suburban kid]Is this a rumor, or does he have a source?[/quote]

      no idea, although seems to be a source.

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    153. 164 Suburban kid says:

      Sorry, I meant that in Yellon terms.

      A-Rod being traded to the Cubs for A-Ram wasn’t a rumor, because he had a source.

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    154. 165 mb21 says:

      In other words, there’s not a chance in hell the Cubs trade Matt Garza.

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    155. 166 Suburban kid says:

      The hovel is looking nice these days. I’ve got a new dead cat in the doorway. Ginger. It brings out the trim of the scatter cushions.

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    156. 167 Suburban kid says:

      [quote name=mb21]Didn’t notice this yesterday, but RC posted an Unobstructed View: [/quote]It’s not all about you, MB.

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    157. 168 Suburban kid says:

      Yankees source says they aren’t winning Darvish bid, and expect the Jays or Rangers have the highest bid.

      http://www.nj.com/yankees/index.ssf/2011/12/yankees_not_getting_japanese_p.html

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    158. 169 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Suburban kid]It’s not all about you, MB.[/quote]I don’t believe that shit.

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    159. 170 Suburban kid says:

      [quote name=fang2415]
      Cricket, like baseball, has more jargon than the all other sports put together, and the exceptions to rules are often more important than the rules.[/quote]This is important to remember. I was at a game in Toronto and there was a couple sitting in front of me, on a date. The woman had a strong French accent and knew nothing about the game. The guy explained in simple yet thorough terms everything that was happening in terms of pitching, batting, runs, outs, advancing around the bases, etc. But after everything he said, she would inevitably reply, “but WHY does he hit the ball with the stick?).

      I experience a similar existential disconnect whenever I try to watch cricket, or have someone explain it to me.

      We need to appreciate the obtuse nature of our sport as both part of its rich character as well as the barrier that keeps it from becoming more popular in the world at large.

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    160. 171 Rice Cube says:

      I liked the part where Tebow ran backwards about 30 yards before getting sacked.

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    161. 173 ACT says:

      Cricket match is starting up again.

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    162. 174 ACT says:

      So, 1st innings:
      Bangladesh: 338
      Pakistan: 87-1

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    163. 175 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=ACT]http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2011-12-19/kim-jong-il-north-korea-s-dear-leader-dictator-dead-at-70-yonhap-says.html[/quote]Kim Jong-Il’s greatest legacy:

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    164. 176 ACT says:

      Game is delayed on account of fog. Seriously.

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    165. 177 Aisle424 says:

      Warning: stripos() expects parameter 1 to be string, array given in /home/obstruc/public_html/wp-content/plugins/jetpack/modules/shortcodes/blip.php on line 10

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      [quote name=Rice Cube]Kim Jong-Il’s greatest legacy:



      I’m sorry to hear about Kim Jong Il, RC. I just assume that you knew him.

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    166. 178 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=Desipio]Just heard the paranoid little dictator has died. Now who’s going to camp out in the back row of the left field bleachers?[/quote]
      (dying laughing)
      (dying laughing)
      (dying laughing)

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    167. 179 mb21 says:

      I thought they had 4 days to accept the Darvish bid.

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    168. 180 GBTS says:

      It appears it was four business days.

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    169. 182 mb21 says:

      [quote name=GBTS]It appears it was four business days.[/quote]In sports the idea that Saturday and Sunday aren’t business days is ridiculous. The NFL plays most of their games on Sunday. It is a business day. Teams never have Saturday or Sunday off during the regular season in baseball. In sports, there are 7 business days per week.

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    170. 183 WaLi says:

      I’d like to thank Jesus Tebow for leading Dancing Bear Down to victory over Snyds in fantasy football this past weekend. Although he lost the game and only completed 50% of his passes with no throwing TD’s, he still knew he had to grind it out to help Dancing Bear Down win and ran for 93 yards with 2 TD. As Urlacher says “he is a good running back”

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    171. 184 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Aisle424]I’m sorry to hear about Kim Jong Il, RC. I just assume that you knew him.[/quote]
      I suppose that joke was inedididibre.

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    172. 185 Suburban kid says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]I suppose that joke was inedididibre.[/quote]Would you like some blokli in your sarad?

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    173. 186 Suburban kid says:

      [quote name=Suburban kid]Would you like some blokli in your sarad?[/quote]

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    174. 187 Mish says:

      Dude, the list of titles Kim Jong Il went by is almost as long as my cock.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Kim_Jong-il%27s_titles

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    175. 188 GBTS says:

      [quote name=Mish]Dude, the list of titles Kim Jong Il went by is almost as long as my cock.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Kim_Jong-il%27s_titles/quoteWhy is Kenny Williams at the top of the page?

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    176. 189 WaLi says:

      [quote name=Mish]Dude, the list of titles Kim Jong Il went by is almost as long as my cock.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Kim_Jong-il%27s_titles/quotehttp://www.cbsnews.com/8301-202_162-57344961/kim-jong-il-n-korean-dictator-dies-at-69/
      My favorite part:

      North Korean legend has it that Kim was born on Mount Paektu, one of Korea’s most cherished sites, in 1942, a birth heralded in the heavens by a pair of rainbows and a brilliant new star. Soviet records, however, indicate he was born in Siberia in 1941

      The whole Mount Paektu birth with double rainbows sounds a lot better (dying laughing)

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    177. 190 Suburban kid says:

      My two favorite titles:

      • Dear Leader, who is a perfect incarnation of the appearance that a leader should have
      • Amazing politician

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    178. 191 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Mish]Dude, the list of titles Kim Jong Il went by is almost as long as my cock.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Kim_Jong-il%27s_titles/quoteThat's only if it’s on microfiche, right?

      Heyoooo…

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    179. 192 GBTS says:

      I thought Microfiche was what Mish called his penis in the first place.

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    180. 193 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=GBTS]I thought Microfiche was what Mish called his penis in the first place.[/quote]Is that like a MicroMish?

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    181. 194 Rice Cube says:

      Jeremy Hermida —> Padres?

      Oh I see, he was claimed off waivers. For some reason I thought he was still a Marlin.

      http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2011/12/padres-to-sign-jeremy-hermida.html

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    182. 195 Rice Cube says:

      http://www.hardballtimes.com/main/article/the-cooperstown-case-for-jeff-bagwell/

      I’d like to see Bagwell get at least 55% this time around.

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    183. 196 GBTS says:

      Let’s play a game, Bears fans.

      Quarterback A: 171 yards per game, 60% completion percentage, 4 touchdowns, 2 picks, and 16 sacks, 83 QB rating (6 games)

      Quarterback B: 153 yards per game, 50% completion percentage, 3 touchdowns, 9 picks, 19 sacks 42 QB rating (4 games)

      One of those is Donovan McNabb, who obviously is no way could have come into a Mike Martz offense this late in the season and run it effectively.

      Quarterback B is Caleb Fucking Hanie.

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    184. 197 WaLi says:

      [quote name=GBTS]Let’s play a game, Bears fans.

      Quarterback A: 171 yards per game, 60% completion percentage, 4 touchdowns, 2 picks, and 16 sacks, 83 QB rating (6 games)

      Quarterback B: 153 yards per game, 50% completion percentage, 3 touchdowns, 9 picks, 19 sacks 42 QB rating (4 games)

      One of those is Donovan McNabb, who obviously is no way could have come into a Mike Martz offense this late in the season and run it effectively.

      Quarterback B is Caleb Fucking Hanie.[/quote]But Caleb Fucking Hanie looked good for a few plays in the NFC Championship vs the Packers! And he knows the system (the stats don’t lie, look at those sacks)! And he is a white gritty QB Chicago fans can rally behind!

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    185. 198 GBTS says:

      [quote name=WaLi]But Caleb Fucking Hanie looked good for a few plays in the NFC Championship vs the Packers‘ prevent defense, but also threw a back-breaking pick six to a defensive lineman, along with a season-ending interception, which everyone conveniently forgets when they talk about how good Caleb Fucking Hanie looked in that game.[/quote].

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    186. 199 Rice Cube says:

      http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news;_ylt=AsDILOuvQ6a6QdTPfxZwnTsRvLYF?slug=jp-passan_10_degrees_yu_darvish_toronto_free_agents_121911

      I liked this line:

      Epstein and Hoyer are smart enough to get by and fill their holes in other ways, though they inherited a club that looks like it had been sprayed with an AK-47.

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    187. 200 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=GBTS]Let’s play a game, Bears fans.

      Quarterback A: 171 yards per game, 60% completion percentage, 4 touchdowns, 2 picks, and 16 sacks, 83 QB rating (6 games)

      Quarterback B: 153 yards per game, 50% completion percentage, 3 touchdowns, 9 picks, 19 sacks 42 QB rating (4 games)

      One of those is Donovan McNabb, who obviously is no way could have come into a Mike Martz offense this late in the season and run it effectively.

      Quarterback B is Caleb Fucking Hanie.[/quote]
      If ever there was an argument that a team in Chicago doesn’t care about winning as long as they field a team that sells out the stadium every week, it is the Bears.

      They consistently go with the cheap option while feeding a line of bull about knowing the system, or having confidence in the young players developing, yada yada yada.

      They could have acquired a real receiver this offseason, instead they got Roy Williams.

      They could have traded a low round draft pick to make sure they acquired Orton instead of letting him go through waivers where they had about a 2% chance of acquiring him. They let him go to KC.

      They could have had McNabb, but they didn’t want to sign an extra QB if there was the slightest possibility that Hanie could succeed because they plain don’t want to spend the money.

      It happens year in and year out with that team and yet the Cubs are always the ones portrayed as the team that doesn’t care about winning. The only reason Wannstedt isn’t still the head coach over there is because fans finally stopped buying season tickets.

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    188. 201 Aisle424 says:

      Now the window on this defense is just about closed and we’ll waste having a perfectly good QB because he has no receivers to throw to and he’ll have to put up 40 per game to have a chance at a winning record.

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    189. 202 GBTS says:

      I think next year is the defense’s swan song: Urlacher’s last year under contract, Tillman’s salary doubles in 2013, Briggs is perpetually seeking a trade, and there is no depth whatsoever to plug any missing holes.

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    190. 203 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=GBTS]I think next year is the defense’s swan song: Urlacher’s last year under contract, Tillman’s salary doubles in 2013, Briggs is perpetually seeking a trade, and there is no depth whatsoever to plug any missing holes.[/quote]
      Exactly, and they are aging. It’s not like the defense is as good as it once was. Briggs and Urlacher are still very good, but they are not game changers anymore. Next year is pretty much it for this defense since they can’t seem to draft anyone who is good for more than a season, and it would not surprise me at all if it just falls apart next year.

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    191. 204 GBTS says:

      Grabow —–> Dodgers

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    192. 205 Rice Cube says:

      Grabow —> Dodgers

      RC —> whatever

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    193. 206 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=GBTS]Grabow —–> Dodgers[/quote][quote name=Rice Cube]Grabow —> Dodgers

      RC —> whatever[/quote]
      So is that like John Grabow putting on a Dodgers’ uniform?

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    194. 207 GBTS says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]Grabow —> Dodgers

      RC —> Needs to learn to refresh the fucking comments before posting about shit[/quote]/Internet tough guy

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    195. 208 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=GBTS]/Internet tough guy[/quote]Don’t tell me what to do.

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    196. 209 GBTS says:

      I like to sing “Yu Darvish” to the tune of “Who Are You?”

      Yuuuuuuuuuuu Darrrvish. Yu Yu. Yu Yu.

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    197. 210 ACT says:

      Grabow was signed to a minor-league deal.

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    198. 211 Suburban kid says:

      [quote name=GBTS]I like to sing “Yu Darvish” to the tune of “Who Are You?”

      Yuuuuuuuuuuu Darrrvish. Yu Yu. Yu Yu.[/quote]Go on and tell me who are Yu?

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    199. 212 Suburban kid says:

      What happened to John Grabow?

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    200. 213 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Suburban kid]What happened to John Grabow?[/quote]
      They fed him after midnight.

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    201. 214 WenningtonsGorillaCock says:

      [quote name=Mish]Dude, the list of titles Kim Jong Il went by is almost as long as my cock.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Kim_Jong-il%27s_titles/quote
      not mine.

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    202. 215 fang2415 says:

      [quote name=Mish]Dude, the list of titles Kim Jong Il went by is almost as long as my cock.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Kim_Jong-il%27s_titles/quote

      죽은 Dead In use since December 2011.

      (dying laughing)@ Wikipedia

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    203. 216 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=fang2415](dying laughing)@ Wikipedia[/quote]Whoever performed that edit should get the Nobel Peace Prize.

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    204. 217 Mish says:

      This was also just added:

      노먼 베이츠

      Norman Bates
      The title has been in use since birth, well because he’s Psycho.

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    205. 218 Pinetar says:

      [quote name=Mish]This was also just added:[/quote]

      I put that there cause it fits.

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    206. 219 Pinetar says:

      [quote name=Pinetar]I put that there cause it fits.[/quote]
      Some SOB removed it ;-)

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    207. 220 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Pinetar]I put that there cause it fits.[/quote][quote name=Pinetar]Some SOB removed it ;-) [/quote]

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    208. 221 WaLi says:

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    209. 223 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Mish]The Dark Knight Rises trailer: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/wb/thedarkknightrises//quoteI am sad but understanding that this run of Batman movies has to end, and am also apprehensive as to how they can possibly improve upon the Batman mythos in live action cinema.

      Bane looks pretty badass BTW.

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    210. 224 Berselius says:

      http://tominpaine.blogspot.com/2011/12/dr-jonathan-dranov-puts-final-nail-in.html

      (dying laughing) @ PSU fans. I can’t believe the victories they’re claiming in this case. The best was during the hearing earlier this week when BSD commenters were sure that McCuey’s testimony couldn’t construe anal rape, which makes everything okay. Completely exonorated!! (dying laughing) (dying laughing)

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    211. 225 Berselius says:

      Also, I can’t wait to vote against Craig James next year

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    212. 226 Rice Cube says:

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    213. 227 Rice Cube says:

      Wow.

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    214. 228 GBTS says:

      That dude in the blue is definitely a closet CIA spy. He gets hit, goes for a ride for about 20 yards, then executes a perfect tuck and roll. Textbook.

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    215. 229 Suburban kid says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]Wow.

      [/quote]Can’t stop watching…

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    216. 230 Berselius says:

      What the fuck was that?

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    217. 231 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Berselius]What the fuck was that?[/quote]Runaway golf cart.

      http://www.khou.com/news/texas-news/Dekaney-football-coach-hit-by-golf-cart-after-state-title-game-135862023.html

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    218. 232 GBTS says:

      [quote name=Berselius]What the fuck was that?[/quote]I know, that Grabow deal came out of nowhere.

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    219. 233 WaLi says:

      [quote name=Berselius]What the fuck was that?[/quote]

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    220. 234 Rice Cube says:

      From a coworker.

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    221. 235 GBTS says:

      North Korea doesn’t look so bad.

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    222. 236 Rice Cube says:

      I liked the part at the end where Kim Jong-Il totally partied down with IKEA stuff.

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    223. 237 fang2415 says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJNBfBr-OGU

      From a coworker.[/quote]They may be living on a handful of rice a day, but they put on one hell of a halftime show.

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    224. 239 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=Aisle424]Holy mother of DeRosa, this is scary.

      http://motherboard.vice.com/2011/12/16/dear-congress-it-s-no-longer-ok-to-not-know-how-the-internet-works/quote

      But for some committee members, the issue did not stop at mere ignorance. Rather, it seemed there was in many cases an outright refusal to understand what is undoubtedly a complex issue dealing with highly-sensitive technologies.

      It sounds like Congress was infiltrated by an even more dangerous version of Joe Morgan.

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    225. 240 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=Rice Cube]It sounds like Congress was infiltrated by an even more dangerous version of Joe Morgan.[/quote]
      That’s exactly what it sounds like. Joe Morgan is running America. Awesome.

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    226. 241 GBTS says:

      [quote name=Aisle424]That’s exactly what it sounds like. Joe Morgan is running America. Awesome.[/quote]That’s not exactly a new phenomenon.

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    227. 242 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=GBTS]That’s not exactly a new phenomenon.[/quote]
      Yeah, but I never realized how perfect that analogy is.

      The internet is probably almost as important to the world economy and social structure as anything ever has been, and these people are openly admitting they don’t know anything about it, and they are perfectly fine with that.

      While we know they don’t understand much about the economy or foreign policy or anything else, they at least have to pretend they do or they get drilled on national television for being idiots. But it’s cool to not have the foggiest damn clue about a tool that pervades almost every aspect of life as we know it. That scares the hell out of me.

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    228. 243 Mish says:

      The Fatal Conceit of politicians – they think they can regulate X without any specific knowledge or understanding of what they are about to regulate.

      /political talk

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    229. 244 mb21 says:

      [quote name=Aisle424]That’s exactly what it sounds like. Joe Morgan is running America. Awesome.[/quote](dying laughing) we need a Joe Morgan for President image.

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    230. 245 WenningtonsGorillaCock says:

      Jon Bon Jovi ——–> deceased

      er, maybe not. The article I was sent appears about as reliable as a Paul Sullivan rumor

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    231. 246 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=WenningtonsGorillaCock]Jon Bon Jovi ——–> deceased[/quote]
      False.

      http://www.gossipcop.com/jon-bon-jovi-dead-died-december-2011-rip-death-rumor-hoax/

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    232. 247 GBTS says:

      [quote name=WenningtonsGorillaCock]Jon Bon Jovi ——–> deceased[/quote]False.

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    233. 248 GBTS says:

      To be fair, he’s probably halfway there.

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    234. 249 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=WenningtonsGorillaCock]Jon Bon Jovi ——–> deceased

      er, maybe not. The article I was sent appears about as reliable as a Paul Sullivan rumor[/quote]
      If it didn’t come from a guy in a purple shirt, GTFO!

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    235. 250 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=GBTS]To be fair, he’s probably halfway there.[/quote]
      (dying laughing)
      (dying laughing)

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    236. 251 WenningtonsGorillaCock says:

      [quote name=GBTS]False.[/quote]
      Yeah, I didn’t have a source. (dying laughing)

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    237. 252 Berselius says:

      [quote name=mb21](dying laughing) we need a Joe Morgan for President image.[/quote]Let’s not give him any ideas.

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    238. 253 Suburban kid says:

      GBTS has outed himself as a 70s/80s stadium rock nerd today. I did not see that coming..

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    239. 254 Rice Cube says:

      [quote name=GBTS]To be fair, he’s probably halfway there.[/quote]I was going to make an “It could go either way” joke with “Wanted: Dead or Alive” but I think this one wins the internets.

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    240. 255 Aisle424 says:

      [quote name=Suburban kid]GBTS has outed himself as a 70s/80s stadium rock nerd today. I did not see that coming..[/quote]
      Bon Jovi is a recent band I enjoyed.

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    241. 256 Berselius says:

      [quote name=Suburban kid]GBTS has outed himself as a 70s/80s stadium rock nerd today. I did not see that coming..[/quote]We salute you, GBTS

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    242. 257 Smokestack Lightning says:

      Hymen:

      This is all still speculation, but fwiw folks whove spoken to #bluejays people say they don’t seem confident they won darvish bid.

      http://twitter.com/#!/JonHeymanCBS/status/148856982374326272

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    243. 258 mb21 says:

      From what I’ve read it sounds like the Rangers won the bid.

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