Kate Upton Dancing and a Cubs Bunting Tournament Update

In Uncategorized by aisle424122 Comments

I know everyone (particularly MO) is deeply concerned about how the bunting tournament is progressing, so here are the results as of a few minutes ago.  I'd link to where I got the results, but I had to piece it together from various tweets and stories from Carrie Muskat, Bruce Miles, whoever is running the Cubs coverage at ESPN Chicago now, and Paul Sullivan.

Note that Bob Brenly's son was ousted in the first round, thus probably drawing the ire of Bob for playing selfish baseball.

You're welcome, MO.

How do you like the bunting tournament so far, Kate?

Fantastic.

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  1. uncle dave

    Am I seeing that the hitting coach got knocked out in the first round? I can’t decide if that’s a good thing or a bad thing…

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  2. Author
    Aisle424

    That’s Jason Jaramillo. He’s a catcher.

    The only non-players were Sveum because they had 63 in camp and they needed 64, and then Bussy the strength and conditioning coach who stepped in for Chris Carpenter when he got sent to the Red Sox.

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  3. Author
    Aisle424

    Highlights include Reed “Plays the Right Way” Johnson got beat in the first round by Marlon “Every Day I’m Hustlin'” Byrd. Little guys that you’d think could bunt like Sczur and Campana both got eliminated, but Sczur at least made it to the 2nd round. There is a Castro vs. Barney Sweet 16 matchup lurking that will pit “the kids” against each other.

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  4. Author
    Aisle424

    I am a 1983 graduate of the University of Wisconsin and have received Master Degrees from the University of North Carolina and Loyola University of Chicago.

    Which goes to prove that if you stay in school and have the intelligence, drive, and stamina to obtain two separate advanced degrees, you can eventually work yourself into a position to collect men’s urine in cups for a living.

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  5. mb21

    Have people been talking shit about the guy who collected the urine? If so, that’s just fucking pathetic. If Brewers fans are doing it, the Brewers should be removed from MLB. If MLB is in any doing it, there should be no more MLB. Pathetic.

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  6. Author
    Aisle424

    mb21 wrote:

    Have people been talking shit about the guy who collected the urine? If so, that’s just fucking pathetic. If Brewers fans are doing it, the Brewers should be removed from MLB. If MLB is in any doing it, there should be no more MLB. Pathetic

    It all stems from Braun’s statement:

    there were a lot of things that we learned about the collector, about the collection process, about the way that the entire thing worked that made us very concerned and very suspicious about what could have actually happened.”

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  7. Author
    Aisle424

    mb21 wrote:

    Yeah, it has Auto-play on as a default, so anytime anyone refreshed, it would play it. I figured that would get pretty fucking annoying, so I turned it off.

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  8. mb21

    I’ve never had the problem with Braun that many others have, but fuck him. I don’t give a shit about who uses steroids, but it’s funny that someone who does cheat like he did questions the integrity of another. Fuck him.

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  9. Author
    Aisle424

    It is weird that the policy he is claiming exists was to take the samples home instead of registering that they had been collected by FedEx and stored properly. He’s either lying, doesn’t understand the procedure, or MLB’s procedure doesn’t line up with the policy of the collection agency’s policy and nobody noticed or cared.

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  10. josh

    @ Rice Cube:
    I think that’s right. Someone issued an ad hoc protocol when the situation arose, and it never got put in the official documentation, so now that there was an issue, Braun’s lawyer simply noticed this slight inconsistency. If this were a government funded study, they’d do the same thing if proper procedure wasn’t followed. It certainly doesn’t exonerate him. But there’s nothing anyone can do now, except wait for him to mess up again.

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  11. josh

    Braun didn’t think there was anything wrong with the way it was handled, because he wouldn’t have even known until his lawyer asked questions. And if he had not been comfortable with the way the sample was collected, he would have told his union rep then and there. The truth is more probably that he thought the stuff he took was supposed to be gone and so he was supremely confident that nothing would happen.

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  12. Author
    Aisle424

    Rice Cube wrote:

    I think the policy between the agency and the MLB is inconsistent. They’ll have to close that loophole. The arbitrator is supposed to release his statement in a few weeks as well.

    That’s my guess too, RC. I expect we’ll get a statement from Braun soon about how he didn’t mean to personally attack the guy, but that he was raising the questions about the procedure involving a person he didn’t know and had no reason to trust. Something like that.

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  13. jtsunami

    And for the first time in the history of 64 team tournaments, a 16 seed upset a 1 seed. Dammit Junior Lake, you are so raw.

    Although I’m sure Klaw isn’t surprised about Szczur’s scrap factor.

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  14. mb21

    As I understand it, there’s a special circumstances clause that MLB felt would justify the fact that there was this loophole. The arbitrator didn’t agree. I am interested to see what he says. If being unable to mail it isn’t a special circumstance, what is?

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  15. uncle dave

    Aisle424 wrote:

    That’s Jason Jaramillo. He’s a catcher.
    The only non-players were Sveum because they had 63 in camp and they needed 64, and then Bussy the strength and conditioning coach who stepped in for Chris Carpenter when he got sent to the Red Sox.

    Ah, ok. I’ve now officially thought way too much about this contest (and our prospective backup catcher) than I think anyone really needed to…

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  16. mb21

    My guess is the arbitrator noticed the loophole and rather than allow a special circumstance to justify he voted to overturn it. He was essentially voting for MLB to change the policy.

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  17. Rice Cube

    @ mb21:
    What about all that stuff Braun said about there being a bunch of FedEx locations still open in Milwaukee? And wouldn’t FedEx have their own sample storage areas? I receive perishable items from FedEx all the time (packed with cold packs or dry ice in styrofoam) and while those are usually shipped overnight, it stands to reason that some parts of the truck/transport have to be climate controlled.

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  18. josh

    @ Rice Cube:
    I don’t believe FedEx will do that at all– too much liability. Where I work they have to send samples via FedEx, and they often have to keep them over the weekend so that they don’t run into problems. They also pack like you were describing. However, it’s in our protocols so we stay compliant with all those kinds of GLP laws and all that junk. Bizarre that it wasn’t in their official protocol, or that they don’t use a specialized courier or something like that if that was an issue. It was a dumb error on MLB’s part not to correct that.

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  19. josh

    Plus, according to that collector, the FedEx places that were open were further than 50 miles away. I really don’t doubt that dude was following the rules. Someone changed the rules, or made a quick decision for a situation that hadn’t been anticipated and didn’t go through the channels.

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  20. Author
    Aisle424

    josh wrote:

    Plus, according to that collector, the FedEx places that were open were further than 50 miles away.

    Braun’s statement said there was something like 18 FedEx locations between the stadium and the guy’s house.

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  21. josh

    @ Aisle424:
    Well, then I totally believe it.

    I have no idea, to be honest. If the rule that guy was following said “Any Fedex within 50 miles of the stadium, and it has to be open, else take home” then that’s the rule the dude probably followed. Or maybe he fucked up. Maybe he dumped some steroids in there. Hell, maybe he and the guy who framed OJ were in cahoots.

    I guess I believe that the guy followed the rules as they were given to him.

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  22. mb21

    The guy didn’t say there wasn’t one still open. He said there wasn’t one that shipped packages. I would assume it’s true, but I don’t know.

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  23. mb21

    I completed my collections at Miller Park at approximately 5:00 p.m. Given the lateness of the hour that I completed my collections, there was no FedEx office located within 50 miles of Miller Park that would ship packages that day or Sunday.

    Therefore, the earliest that the specimens could be shipped was Monday, October 3. In that circumstance, CDT has instructed collectors since I began in 2005 that they should safeguard the samples in their homes until FedEx is able to immediately ship the sample to the laboratory, rather than having the samples sit for one day or more at a local FedEx office. The protocol has been in place since 2005 when I started with CDT and there have been other occasions when I have had to store samples in my home for at least one day, all without incident.

    This would be easy enough to verify and it’s doubtful he’d make a public statement like this that wasn’t factual. He does have an attorney so whatever he wrote was first viewed by the attorney.

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  24. GW

    mb21 wrote:

    I’d imagine the Cubs Network would air throughout much of the country. There are a lot of Cubs fans around and they will demand their cable provider carry it.

    The problem with the analogy is that the btn has full broadcast rights. Whenever I have had access to nesn or yes (always outside of their regions), the actual games have been blacked out in the same way that local CSN-type networks have games blacked out outside their regions. MLB does this to keep people buying the extra innings package. The only exceptions that I know of are the superstations, WGN and formerly TBS. Broadcasting on WGN thus has a definite monetary value for the Cubs, one that is long term. That value is not as great as it once was, but it’s definitely real.

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  25. mb21

    There were some that were open, but the last time they shipped was 4:30. This guy is right. He definitely would not release a statement like this that was not factually correct. Braun, on the other hand, has no reason not to lie. He’s already been lying so just keep it up.

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  26. mb21

    @ GW:
    Good point. I wonder why it is that WGN airs games like they do. What is different about WGN and a potential Cubs Network? What would a Cubs Network have to do to be similar to WGN?

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  27. mb21

    @ Rice Cube:
    Yeah, they have to be able to test on weekends. What’s going to happen is that a clarification is going to be added to the rules so that this doesn’t happen again. I imagine what will be required is exactly what this tester did.

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  28. josh

    @ mb21:
    I guess it boils down to there being some kind of conflict with either the rules or what the contractor was told, and that created enough of a reasonable doubt that they tossed it out. In the end, you believe as Braun proposes that this implies he is innocent (some steroids fell into the cup in the dude’s house), or you don’t. I seriously doubt the contractor did anything wrong, at least as far as he understood what was the correct procedure, or that he tampered with it or tried to frame Braun or anything like that. I don’t even know if something like that is physically possible.

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  29. josh

    @ mb21:
    Exactly. In this situation his only choice is to make himself seem super right. The bigger and more clearly articulated his outrage, the more people will believe him and forget it (he hopes). I don’t think there’s anything that can be done. No one can prove anything at this point, so it might as well be dropped. Not that I think the public will let it go, but there’s really nothing more to say until/unless he tests positive again. MLB will need to amend the rule or whatever it is they have to do, and that’s that.

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  30. mb21

    @ josh:
    Personally, I don’t think there’s any doubt that Braun used. As I’ve said many times, I also don’t care. I don’t like that he blamed someone else for his fuck up, but that’s the kind of people these guys are.

    I don’t believe for a moment this guy tampered with Braun’s sample. I’d sooner believe that Jesus Christ himself came back to life and fucked with his sample because he doesn’t like Braun’s clothing line or some shit like that.

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  31. mb21

    @ GW:
    That could be, but I’d bet there is some sort of distinction between WGN and a typical regional network. No idea what it could be though. Maybe it’s what you suggest.

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  32. mb21

    The reality is that unless they test the players every single day there’s always going to be a sizable number of people who use. I’d rather MLB spend money on education than drug tests. It’s a waste of money.

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  33. Author
    Aisle424

    From Forbes:

    The YES Network, the team’s 34%-owned regional sports channel, is the most profitable RSN in the country and had over $400 million in revenue last year.

    So if the Cubs can get anywhere close to that kind of revenue and own only slightly more than 34%, they’ll easily be taking in what the Rangers and Angels are doing. Maybe the plan is to convert CSN to the Cubs Network seeing as they already own 25%, but in that case, I would think that Reinsdorf WOULD be a big stumbling block.

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  34. GW

    Aisle424 wrote:

    the team’s 34%-owned regional sports channel,

    so they do refer to it as a “regional sports channel,” i wonder if there is a way to avoid that distinction

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  35. Rice Cube

    @ mb21:
    I thought they started blood tests for MiLB, but MLB would have it starting this spring per the new CBA. However, MLB blood testing is only on a “trial” basis until they figure out the kinks. Would have to look up the CBA again to be sure but that’s just my recollection.

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  36. GW

    I also suspect that the cubs, if they owned their own broadcast rights via a network, could give mlb.tv the go-ahead to broadcast in the blackout zones like Iowa and downstate. I think yes did something like this for a premium.

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  37. Suburban kid

    For those who believe Braun’s sample must have been tampered with, I wonder what they think the motivation would be.

    I cannot imagine anyone trying to do this outside of a bad movie plot.

    And in the movie, they do it to extort money somehow. Because the effort, risk and cost wouldn’t make sense otherwise, considering they’d have to steal the original sample and replace it with the exact packaging and labeling, or they’d have to bribe the collector to gain access to the original clean samples.

    At this point, the whole thing breaks down. I can’t see how anyone can gain anything, how any extortion can take place. And even a horrifically bad movie wouldn’t go the route of baseball sabotage (another team setting him up). Maybe personal vendetta, but I can’t believe even Ryan Braun has enemies that motivated just to gain revenge.

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  38. mb21

    @ Suburban kid:
    Yeah, SK, the idea his sample was tampered with is absurd, There’s no way the guy who took the sample is going to tamper with it. This is his career. He probably cares a lot more about following the law and keeping his job than he does to keep Ryan fucking Braun from playing 50 games in 2012. His wife? What possible motive would she have? How would you even tamper with it? I wouldn’t think you could just take a syringe and inject some steroids in it. Surely that would raise all kinds of red flags, right? There’s a better chance I have sex with the Cowboys cheerleaders tonight, Lakers cheerleaders tomorrow and the communist president with no birth certificate on Thursday than there is that it was tampered with.

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  39. Suburban kid

    I am not bothered that he — IMFO — took steroids, but I am a little bothered that he lied and threw people under the bus. Do what you gotta do, but own up to it.

    Back in October I told my brother, who lives behind the cheese curtain, that I would root for the Brewers in the playoffs but I couldn’t stand Ryan Braun. He couldn’t believe it, and proclaimed him a really great guy. I don’t even want to ask him what he (and his Brewer-fan kids) think now.

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  40. Mercurial Outfielder

    I’m just glad MB is finally in the “Lloyd Braun is a Royal Crown Asswipe” Club. I placed your RemeTEE shirt in the mail today, MB. I tossed in a complimentary trailer hitch cover and a South Carolina state flag.

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  41. Mercurial Outfielder

    And another thing: fuck Luke Scott and his phony tough guy routine. You know who’s tough? John fucking Basilone was fucking tough. Smedley fucking Butler was tough. Those guys didn’t talk shit about killing bad guys. They signed a fucking paper, strapped on a pack, and kicked some bad guy ass. Luke Scott is a shitmouthed rich guy with fancy hunting implements. Fuck him and the fucking horse he rode in. I had fucking new guys in my platoon that would have eaten that pampered son of a bitch for breakfast.

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  42. josh

    @ Suburban kid:
    I’m in complete agreement. I think this is, however, the exact thing Braun will do(/has done): claim to be a victim and present himself as being full of righteous indignation. If everyone let it go, he might back down, but he strikes me as the kind of douchebag who would keep going until he was “proven” right, by getting an innocent victim fired. It doesn’t matter that it’s probably not possible, and certainly not reasonable, that anyone would do it, not to the mass media. Time will tell. If he’s half the “good guy” he presents himself to be, he’ll shut up about it now and forever and not throw anyone under the bus, and do a better job of not getting caught next time.

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  43. uncle dave

    @ Mercurial Outfielder:
    Didn’t Butler’s open opposition to the military-industrial complex make him a communist, though? I suspect that’s how contemporary South Carolinians would look at it.

    josh wrote:

    @ Mercurial Outfielder:
    I feel this way about Ted Nugent.

    I actually kinda dig a few of his early and deep tracks, but I can’t even bring myself to listen to them any more. My hatred of the man is really that strong. On the other hand, I have no affection for anything that Luke Scott has ever done. Can you imagine a clubhouse with him, Berkman, and Oswalt running around? That’s some serious redneck bullshit, even by east Texas standards.

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  44. Mercurial Outfielder

    @ uncle dave:

    Anyone that thinks Smedley Butler was a communist is an idiot. But, yes, when he wrote “War Is A Racket,” his allegiance was questioned, despite his winning two Medals of Honor and living to tell. However, that was largely because not a damn a thing in that book was false, so they couldn’t attack him on rational grounds, so they called him a commie. Some things never change.

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  45. Mercurial Outfielder

    @ GW:

    He’s too busy hunting down all the communists in his swanky hotel room. Tomorrow he’ll see if there are any in his locker. Tough guy. GRRRRRRRRR

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  46. Mercurial Outfielder

    Luke Scott is the kind of guy that plays Call of Duty all day every day and thinks he’s ready to go to war.

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  47. Mercurial Outfielder

    @ mb21:

    Yeah, it’s pretty bizarre. I don’t get it, either. It’s just leftover rhetoric trafficked by people too stupid to know better.

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  48. Mercurial Outfielder

    Oh, man, Kellen Winslow. A large percentage of my phony tough guy hatred is reserved for that asshat.

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  49. GBTS

    Starting to prep for 2012 fantasy baseball. Can anyone even imagine what type of flak Joe Mauer would be taking if he weren’t white? Dude signs a $200M contract, and within a year he’s never healthy and slugging under .400. How lazy.

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  50. Author
    Aisle424

    GBTS wrote:

    Starting to prep for 2012 fantasy baseball. Can anyone even imagine what type of flak Joe Mauer would be taking if he weren’t white? Dude signs a $200M contract, and within a year he’s never healthy and slugging under .400. How lazy.

    It’s not laziness. He gets hurt because he cares so much.

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  51. Mercurial Outfielder

    @ mb21:
    That’ll work, too. Welcome to Afghanistan. We have rifles and a Humvee with a mounted .50 cal. You get two spears. Good luck, tough guy. Go find the communists.

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  52. Mercurial Outfielder

    Soto ———–> out for first week of ST with strained groin

    GROTA ROB ———–> finding a way to make this about Soto being Puerto Rican

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  53. GROTA Rob

    @ Mercurial Outfielder:

    It’s surprising given how much weight he lost this offseason eating his beans and rice. Clearly he had been working out a lot so he could hang out with the rest of his thug friends guarding all of their smoking hot women.

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