Top Ten Signs the Cubs Might Contend This Year
The Cubs aren’t that good. They were bad last year, and they haven’t taken any dramatic steps forward this offseason. They haven’t even taken very many marginally impressive steps forward. Baby steps maybe? LMFAO shuffling steps, perhaps, but this train ain’t pulling out of Losing-Season Station anytime soon. Case in point: there is no news to report today. Nothing of note. The Friday Facepalm is going to be pretty short, unlike the odds of the Cubs contending.
The few good things that have happened have involved the Cubs’ competition. Albert Pujols is gone. Prince Fielder is gone. Ryan Braun may miss 50 games. The Astros have an identity crisis, and the Pirates are the Pirates. And, oh yeah, the Reds. Well, here are a few other developments that, if they should happen, would point to the Cubs having a chance at contending thanks to addition by infarction:
10. Asteroid hits Cincy.
9. Ryan Braun syphilis rumors turn out to be true and rambunctious shower incident on 3-for-1 cocktail night wreaks havoc on the Brewers’ collective ability to walk.
8. Everyone who believes in Cubbies claps their hands and makes a wish and clicks their heels together three times and maybe stabs random members of NL Central opponents.
7. Your mom.
6. Ronnie Woo Woo changes name to Ronnie Voo Doo.
5. Pack of rabid dogs occupy visitor clubhouse at Wrigley.
4. Mayan calendar magically turns into a W flag.
3. You just woke up from a coma to find this year is actually 2018.
2. Dude, I’m having a hell of a time thinking of ten things, even impossible things, that could allow the Cubs to contend.
1. Every single game: Metamucil in the other guys’ Gatorade.
WTF
Wrigley Talk Friday with Aisley, ACey, and Julie allegedly airs today at 1:00 CT. No idea what we could talk about. None.
Is there a Cubs game today?
No.








(dying laughing)
False.
Nice snark.
Mish wrote:
At least it wasn’t PEDs
Cache is enabled now so if there are any users who aren’t registered who want to follow the comments you should go ahead and register.
Registering…
The season hasn’t even started yet and you’re predicting how the Cubs can win the division? Thanks, but I’ll wait awhile.
/First post’d
new website would’ve looked better if you used geocities.
http://wonder-tonic.com/geocitiesizer/content.php?theme=3&music=9&url=http://www.obstructedview.net/
see?
Aww…Theo looks sad in the new banner. World Series trophy so far away….
EnricoPallazzo wrote:
That was an assault to my sense (dying laughing)
TheRiot —_-_——–>< Giants
http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2012/01/giants-to-sign-ryan-theriot.html
Apologies for the lack of a straight line, the information got caught in a rundown.
/TOOTBLAN'd
Test
<img src="http://img806.imageshack.us/img806/3659/bigalvin.jpg".
(dying laughing) EP that’s awesome. Don’t know why we didn’t think about that layout.
Fail.
replace the . with > and you have it, GBTS.
http://www.w3schools.com/tags/tag_img.asp
BEWB CUPCAKES
Wait, we can’t edit our comments anymore? I live in a world of shit now.
mb21 wrote:
(dying laughing) Fucking shift key.
Mercurial Outfielder wrote:
Yeah, you can’t change your 3:30 A.M. sexual propositions into rants about Paul Sullivan at 6 A.M. anymore.
I’ll look into an edit comments plugin later today.
@ EnricoPallazzo:
(dying laughing)
EnricoPallazzo wrote:
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
GBTS wrote:
Don’t be jealous just because they weren’t intended for you.
This guy has figured out “embedding”
Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, say no more, say no more.
Mercurial Outfielder wrote:
Hey, I answered them, you said I wasn’t mannish enough.
Or not
@ josh:
Josh don’t you mean:
Twink, Twink, fudge, fudge, gay no more, gay no more?
/Wasn’t around to participate in gay bashing Josh last time’d
To embed youtube, just post the url. To embed an image, click on that url I posted earlier. http://www.w3schools.com/tags/tag_img.asp
That’s what I did.
test
I don’t know. My img src tag evaporates when I post.
You can now edit comments.
We’re obviously long overdue for a post about posting.
Josh, it’s like this: [img src="http:www.domain.com/image"]
Replace the brackets with < and >
There:
[img src="http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6206/6121502494_2592abbb6b_m.jpg" width="240" height="160" alt="Bug Love"]
replace [ with <,
evaporates:
It’s possible it’s not letting you guys post images. I’ll look into that too.
test
What doe’s the “#” next to the date stamp do?
Yeah, it’s definitely a user permission thing.
-b
Mucker wrote:
It allows you to link directly to a comment
testyMcTestTest wrote:
When I click “quote” it sometimes does this ^^
@ testyMcTestTest:
Oh ok thanks Teste
testyMcTestTest wrote:
Fail
When’s Garza’s arb date?
Berselius wrote:
Show-off.
josh wrote:
Ditto.
Can anyone see my pic?
Mish wrote:
No.
I guess the Cubs re-signed Bobby Scales to a minor league deal.
http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2012/01/minor-moves-french-tuiasosopo-redding.html?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=facebook
WaLi wrote:
Tritto.
Yes I have the same issue as Josh (the one where my images don’t show an the HTML disappears, not the one where he finds attractive women unattractive).
BOBBY SCALES! Now we just need to trade for Micah Hoffpauir, find Julio Zuleta, and bring Tuffy Rhodes out of retirement.
@ Mish:
Too easy.
adnielsen wrote:
With Doug Dascenzo to pitch.
Berselius wrote:
I would like to like this.
@ josh:
He tripled my first game at Wrigley, so I’d be down for that more, as long as it doesn’t send us over our $105 million payroll.
Oooh, a half hour window to edit my post. I guess I should make sure to change that post about how you guys are a bunch of mindless statfags before my time runs out.
Wrigley Talk Friday is so WTF right now.
This is my first time listening to WTF. Who are Tim McGinnis, Adam Kellogg, and Julie DiCaro? Are they on OV? If so, what’s their screen names?
Tim is Aisle424, and Adam is AndCounting, unless it’s the other way around. Julie has her own blog.
josh wrote:
It sometimes does what?
josh wrote:
@ adnielsen:
Would you ask Tom Petty that question?
Julie sometimes posts here as cubbiejulie, though it’s been awhile. She ran “A League of Her Own” and is part of the writer crew at Aerys Sports.
josh wrote:
Gracias.
Epstein dead.
mb21 wrote:
Just quotes partial text from the original quote. Actually, it happened when I quoted this, and it pulled text from Mish’s post. If I click “quote” a second time, then it’s fine.
@ GW:
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
GW wrote:
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! WHY GOD? WHY?!!!
Ohhhhhhh…. JUAN Epstein.
Nevermind.
Another math joke:
http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/funny-celebrity-pictures-bad-romance.jpg
Can’t has embed pic.
Asshole updated…
http://dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=109
Demi Moore’s 911 call set to the Moneyball SoundtracK? mmmmmk
http://www.buzzfeed.com/provincialelitist/demi-moores-911-call-set-to-the-moneyball-s
How am I supposed to know what posts are funny without a green highlighted post? I’m too lazy to read all of these. This shit be TGIF’s all up in here.
Rice Cube wrote:
We don’t care what you do in the privacy of your own home, RC.
If embed doesn’t work: http://main.makeuseoflimited.netdna-cdn.com/tech-fun/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/pcandmac.jpg
Aisle424 wrote:
Hilarious. Good luck with your blog.
Perhaps another stocking stuff to go with Bobby Scales?
http://www.mlbtraderumors.com/2012/01/rays-designate-russ-canzler-for-assignment.html
Can one of you try posting an image now. If it doesn’t work I’m not sure what else there is to do.
WaLi wrote:
One astronomer used PS3′s connected together to create a supercomputer. I’m not sure where he ranks on this graphic.
Image embed attempt:
I posted a full Flickr copy, which includes an anchor tag to the original file, and it killed only the image tag, so that there’s an href tag around nothing.
There’s no way to allow it in WP then.
Did you try this, maybe?
wordpress.org/extend/plugins/wordpress-comment-images/
It killed the img src tag? Weird. Oh well.
If stupid images aren’t post-able, I might as well log out. I got nothing else.
josh wrote:
That says it’s only compatible up to WordPress 2.9.2. This is 3.3.1. I’ll try it though.
Below the comment box is a link (You can add images….). Try it out
mb21 wrote:
Yeah, I just noticed that too.
Here’s an image I recently tested…[img]http://www.baseball-reference.com/bpv/images/f/f9/1908Cubs.jpg[/img]
[img]http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Q6TZq05jaX8/TTTqiJ54xfI/AAAAAAAABAc/mxvm0cnQqjo/s400/Spin+cycle.png[/img]
[img]http://vista-wallpaper.org/wp-content/gallery/funny-pictures/2_funny.jpg[/img]
I saw you in the street the other day josh. Converses are cool. Also, nice sack. It’s yellow and it looks like it can hold a lot of stuff.
Embed still hates me.
I did notice that every now and then, even if I don’t hit refresh, new posts pop up. I guess this means your site has an auto-refresh to some capacity.
Derp, I get it now.
[img]http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6206/6121502494_2592abbb6b_m.jpg[/img]
Hm.
[img]http://farm7.staticflickr.com/6189/6120955411_85c6d8b2c2_z.jpg[/img]
So now the old square bracket img code works. You don’t have to actually click on the link.
WaLi wrote:
If this is your way of asking if you can touch my balls, the answer is “Yes, for $4.”
Russ Canzler was DFA’d by the Rays. I know with Rizzo and LaHair we have some 1B options but he’s raked the last two seasons in the minors. Worth a flier? He was in the Cubs system previously…
Is everyone just posting random images? Is this turning into Flickr?
#ThisIsAboutMotherFuckingWordpress
jtsunami wrote:
I was just trying to see if I could get it work.
We’ve re-branded as a photography blog.
Aisle424 wrote:
Nice. But the lack of like/dislike buttons has reduced my meager participation by about 50%. I know, I know, haters gon’ hate.
Oh, but I get my regular wordpress avatar picture, my grandpa looking sharp on the Bentonville square. Ok then.
Testing:[img]https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/s320x320/400421_10101236562231190_1906997_68655330_1661164703_n.jpg[/img]
Whoa. Freaky full-screen comment box option is freaky.
[img]http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/wp-content/uploads/cache/2012/01/Riann-2_2/1664644068.jpg[/img]
Sorry if I went too far by posting your family photo up there berselius.
To make amends, I will give you one of my baseball cards.
[img]http://thesportshernia.typepad.com/blog/images/unfrozen_caveman_lawyer_card.jpg[/img]
A joke:
My mom sent me that, and apologized in advance in case I thought it was “too sick”. (dying laughing)
Testing again
Ok I don’t get it, I can’t do images. Did I miss some post on how to post? If you guys were more like BCB…
Look under the “submit comment” button
@ Suburban kid:
Can you post a link with that explanation?
Yes.
Unless you are special, there should be some text under the “Submit Comment” button that says
not unexpectedly, “clicking here” is hyperlinked to one of those pop up things where you enter your fucking image URL.
Suburban kid wrote:
I’m no exhibitionist; pictures of me fucking are not to be posted here.
[img]http://d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net/photo/2180192_460s.jpg[/img]
Wait, did you guys get a new site?
What’s with the timer after you post?
Rodrigo Ramirez wrote:
It’s a bomb. GET OUT
Mish wrote:
Did you plant it? I see you are made of brown.
I tend to buck ethnic stereotypes. Case in point, my enormous penis.
Hm, a new blogging system you say? Time for a test drive…
[img]http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2397/2123875890_2d23f32ce6.jpg[/img]
@ Mish:
Don’t say that in front of Josh….
Suburban kid wrote:
Well, you could always close the curtains since you
SInce we are on wishlists for the newly discredited website, here are mine:
1. A “preview comment’ function
2. When the page loads up, we hear one of JoePa’s greatest motivational speeches with angel’s humming in the background, until the “Joe Paterno Speaks” unobstructed view is knocked off the front page.
Thanks!
Glad to see that this business about unregistered users not being able to refresh for new comments was made up. I hate having to log in to a billion sites every time I restart my browser (dying laughing)
WenningtonsGorillaCock wrote:
Also, this test wins the internet.
You have about 30 minutes to edit your comment.
Also also, the fact that invalid comments (e.g. by forgetting to put in name) send you to a whole new error page make me really glad I have this thing.
mb21 wrote:
Don’t tell me what I have to do.
My life feels incomplete without faget points. Everybody who’s posted something funny in this thread, please just imagine that I wrote (dying laughing) in response. Everybody who wrote something stupid in this thread, you’re an idiot. (dying laughing)
These timers are making me feel like I should hurry up and edit my comments even if they don’t need editing. It’s like a limited-time offer on an extended warantee. (dying laughing)
Not that you care but the two things I really miss are “end of comments” and “refresh comments” functions.
Rodrigo Ramirez wrote:
Please read the post about posting before posting
@ Rodrigo Ramirez:
I plan to add end of comments and top of comments link. They’re nice for the phone. There’s also another option that I might try first (it’s part of the reply/quote buttons plugins. Can’t do a refresh comments on WordPress unless one of you wants to write the script to do it. (dying laughing)
Whoops why can’t I see the comment I just posted about reading the post about posting? I guess I should have read the post about posting before posting a post about reading the post about posting before posting. (dying laughing)
@ SkipVB:
1. I’ll look into that, but IIRC it’s resource intensive.
2. (dying laughing)
Hmm now I can see MB’s new posts but none of my own comments are showing up? Maybe there’s a faget limit in effect for unregistered rabble?
I do get the sense that like five comments of mine are going to show up all at once now…
Hmm, I’m betting I’m only allowed five posts during the bomb-time-limit.
If so, this is an outrage. I demand the right to spam this forum with impunity.
[img]http://www.alexanderinteractive.com/blog/typing-robot-thumb.jpg[/img]
@ mb21:
Great thanks!! And I hope you don’t think I’m complaining. I can’t imagine how intensive this switch has been.
Hey! Cool new digs! May I be the first to offer no complaints or should I just fuck off?
frysredjacket wrote:
Thank you for not complaining. We’re gonna get you so many lizards!
I didn’t put two and two together and realize that Theriot signing with SF meant the Cajun Connection was reunited. Or I guess technically it would be putting 3/2 and 3/2 together.
Berselius wrote:
I personally like the electric snail.
mb21 wrote:
I’d do what he says, Mr. Kenny.
@ Rodrigo Ramirez:
No, I don’t think anyone is complaining. I think change is difficult and we all get used to what we had. Me too. I think we’d all like this to be as close to the same as we’ve had it, but some things won’t be possible.
Speaking of change, I remember DJ saying he hated Joomla after ACB switched. Even if we had switched to Expression Engine, which is what ACB was using prior to Bloguin, he’d have preferred what he’d gotten used to. Everyone is like that.
Oswalt ————> Cardinals (soon)
mb21 wrote:
I prefer smoke signals myself.
I actually kind of liked the LiveFyre experiment even though I think SK and MO hated it (dying laughing)
Rice Cube wrote:
i liked it too, but it was very buggy
mb21 wrote:
So, what was wrong with Joomla, again? I think WordPress has a lot of flexibility (though I don’t know much about Joomla), but requires a little more finesse. At least, that’s been my experience. For me, getting it set up was the hardest part, but it’s run smoothly once I got the kinks ironed out. I thought about experimenting with Joomla, but once you get one setup down, it’s hard to change, from an administrative standpoint in addition to the user side..
I actually liked Livefyre, but all the complaints weren’t worth it. I disliked all of that a lot more than I liked the system. It’s much improved now too.
@ josh:
Joomla doesn’t have a native commenting component, which is nice in a way. You end up with components like we had, which was awesome. You’d never end up with something like that on WP because of the native commenting system. Jcomments hadn’t been updated for a long time and we were running Joomla 1.5. Joomla 1.6 came out a year ago, 1.7 last summer and 2.5 just came out. Still no Jcomments. There was also very little support at this point. Jcomments just wasn’t a reliable commenting component anymore. Many of the extensions we used were no longer supported (updated to 1.6, 1.7 and 2.5 of course) so not updating created some of the issues people were having. All of the other comment components for Joomla suck so it made no sense to switch to an inferior component than we could create here.
whoa, new format, same shitty content
is that timer shit for real, or is that a meme+technology = absurd shit kinda thing?
Joomla doesn’t have a native commenting component, which is nice in a way. You end up with components like we had, which was awesome. You’d never end up with something like that on WP because of the native commenting system. Jcomments hadn’t been updated for a long time and we were running Joomla 1.5. Joomla 1.6 came out a year ago, 1.7 last summer and 2.5 just came out. Still no Jcomments. There was also very little support at this point. Jcomments just wasn’t a reliable commenting component anymore. Many of the extensions we used were no longer supported (updated to 1.6, 1.7 and 2.5 of course) so not updating created some of the issues people were having. All of the other comment components for Joomla suck so it made no sense to switch to an inferior component than we could create here.
careful there. i’m really just testing to make sure I can do everything (dying laughing)
new shit: http://www.obstructedview.net/chicago-cubs/corpas-gone-kerry-wood-40-man-josh-vitters.html