Rammy Gave All He Had Maybe
Mike Quade had his fishing interrupted by Daryl Van Schouen of the Sun Times, so naturally he was in a less than fantastic mood. It appears the dearth of news has hit Chicago's sportswriters like the economy has hit first-half America (we can relate, Daryl), so the Sun Times went fishing for a story and found one in Quade's perception of what Dale Sveum said in his opening presser (ZOMDR, no he DID'N!!!!1FUKUDOME!). It was a pretty benign reaction, all things considered, but it did include this quintessential Quade complimentary insult:
“I thought [Aramis] Ramirez gave a helluva effort last year. Maybe because it was contract year, I don’t know.’’
I don't really care. It's harmless. It's just nice to churn up some fake drama when nothing else is going on.
Hey, Schilling, what do you say? The Cubs are gonna win someday.
Curt Schilling has his money on the Cubs. Eventually. In an interview with Waddle & Silvy on Friday (podcast stream, download), Schilling gave his endorsement of his former GM and said that Theo Epstein would lead the Cubs to the promised land in the next five to ten years, especially if that doesn't wind up being the length of Starlin Castro's prison sentence. Schilling said:
He understands the human element to this. A lot of what I learned from and about Theo I've taken into my company and tried to help my company grow. Theo gets it, and it's not lost on the people who played for him. He's the only general manager I ever played around who fit into the clubhouse. That's a very dangerous thing for general managers, especially if they don't fit. He was always welcome. He's a very smart guy.
The prediction isn't worth much, but it's interesting that for all the talk about Epstein's approach to stats, one of his former players isolated his understanding of the human element of team management as a key component of his success.
Is There a Cubs Game Today?
No.
Photo I Recently Enjoyed
h/t to Aisley
Commercial I recently hated
A lot of people went on and on about how awesome this commercial was. It made zero sense to me. What the hell is "Halftime in America" supposed to mean? Clint Eastwood, yay! America, yay! Let's unite as one, yay! Engines roaring, stirring music, if Detroit can do it so can we, yay, yay, YAYYYYY!!!!
So we're ready for the second half. We're ready for America to end. We're gonna win. Gritty voice. So many people said they felt chills. I felt so completely cold and turned off, I had to check the mirror to make sure I wasn't Ann Coulter. Aaaand /rant.
I wasn’t a big fan of that commercial either, AC.
@ Berselius:
I really did laugh out loud when he said, “It’s halftime in America, too.” It would have been better if he had just said, “It’s Tebow time in America.”
@ AndCounting:
And Eastwood was saying America needed to get back to work and all this BS America crap while promoting a company that only survived by getting bought up by a European company. So where are the profits Chrysler going now? Not to very many Americans. Yea Fiat!
I liked the commercial just because I’m a big fan of Eastwood. He doesn’t do much acting these days so I’ll take what I can get.
As for the message, I couldn’t tell you one thing he said. I didn’t really care about that shit. (dying laughing)
mb21 wrote:
Yeah, I like Eastwood too. I just thought the commercial was clumsily executed.
i wish remediating America’s private sector debt bust was as easy as gunning down Gene Hackman in some nostalgic spaghetti western remake. so does everyone else. that’s why people get the chills over dumbass shit like that. it makes them believe for a few minutes that the problems of their society can be fixed by pretending to be hardass. in other news, people are fucking stupid.
@ mb21:
I felt bad for him having to read that line. It reminded me of that Harrison Ford quote about Lucas’s scripts: “George, you can type this shit, but you sure as hell can’t say it.”
@ gaius marius:
I don’t think it’s news that people are fucking stupid. (dying laughing) Just look for the sea of blue at Wrigley during baseball season.
mb21 wrote:
(dying laughing)
I would have loved to do a focus group of fans of the commercial and ask them to summarize its message. I was ticked by it and still had to rewatch it to have a clue what it was he said.
This was giggle-ating.
@ mb21:
i stand corrected.
@ AndCounting:
I have an amazing skill that allows me to tune out commercials. It’s like commercials come on and my brain shuts down. The show comes back and I’m a fully functional adult. It’s awesome.
I was busy trying to figure out the gender of those polar bears.
@ AndCounting:
I assumed it was something about how America was down at the half but would come back to win it on a field goal as the clock expired. I was mostly trying to figure out whose voice it was at the time and when Clint Eastwood came up I started thinking about Gran Torino. And cats. By the way, the commercials with all the dogs and puppies were awesome.
@ mb21:
I watch almost everything on DVR or Netflix, so when I actually see commercials they can catch me off guard. But last night I was committed to watching them no matter how bad they were or angry I got. It almost felt like the Cubs were playing.
AndCounting wrote:
At least that argument led to one of the best lines in the series, at the end of Empire Strikes Back. IIRC it was an ad-lib because Harrison Ford was so fed up with the awful writing (dying laughing)
Just watched the commercial again. It just reminds me of the annual state of the union. Every year the president, doesn’t matter which party, tells us how awesome America is. We’re gonna win and I’m sitting there thinking, why do we have to win? It’s not a fucking game. If we win, others lose. I’m looking for a tie with NCAA Football overtime rules. Fuck the NFL rules.
AndCounting wrote:
(dying laughing), my gut reaction to the ad was that there are apparently no black people in Detroit
/PC Police
Joe Poz addresses GBTS’ query re: the MVP vs the OPOY…
http://joeposnanski.blogspot.com/2012/02/not-so-cool-brees.html
@ Rice Cube:
I’m assuming he talks about Joe Paterno at some point, right?
mb21 wrote:
He’s waiting until tomorrow, he doesn’t want to ruin anybody’s Monday.
@ Berselius:
Just Tuesday through Sunday. That’s awfully nice of him.
@ mb21:
I actually think that until the Joe Paterno book comes out (if it ever does), Poz is going to avoid mentioning him. Actually was not mentioned in this post, at least.
@ Berselius:
Huh, so it wasn’t just me…I recall my wife and I looking at each other and asking almost simultaneously, where are all the black folks?
@ Berselius:
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
I’m pretty sure that’s true.
http://www.marchandmeffre.com/detroit/
as stupid as it was, at least pale-rider-for-fiat wasn’t as bad as this:
http://chicagoist.com/2012/02/06/pete_hoekstra_debbie_spenditnow_sup.php
some people use commercials to escape for a few minutes into a fantasy that they can fix things by being hardass. other people actually believe that shit all the time — lulz!
I didn’t like the commercial either. It was dripping with false sentimentality. I did love seeing Clint, and he acted the hell out of the voiceover, but it was just empty words. Wouldn’t the Great Depression have been half time? Or what about the Civil War? Does this mean the country ends in approximately 250 years?
I guess we finally know who printed off all those Horry Kow tees.
@ gaius marius:
wow (dying laughing)
@ josh:
I don’t know. When is the next rapture?
Guthrie ——–> COL
Hammel, Lindstrom ——->BAL
Deckchairs ———–> Rearranged
@NotTomRicketts
Pretty much
http://www.chicagonow.com/cubs-den/2012/02/more-thoughts-on-the-concepcion-signing/
@ mb21:
Wait….when was the first one?
IM SORRY JESUS
@ Suburban kid:
It’s okay. I forgive you.
http://awesomenator.com/movies/simpsonized-movie-posters/
[img]http://www.lamebook.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/back-up.jpg[/img]
no way that is real
@ dylanj:
I agree. The Mom’s side doesn’t make sense if you assume that “allowed to enter the back door of the house” is really what she believes.
[img]http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/enhanced/terminal05/2012/2/6/10/enhanced-buzz-22036-1328542272-38.jpg[/img]
@ dylanj:
@ josh:
The likelihood that is fake is pretty high, but it still made me laugh.
Aisle424 wrote:
[img]http://media.syracuse.com/news/photo/8979789-large.jpg[/img]
You’d think that the intern running that congressman’s page would know what the Onion is.
Also, I like baseball.
@ Suburban kid:
False.
@ Aisle424:
I fucking hope Fleming gets aborted. and ye motha fuckas I was aborted
/wtf?
@ Aisle424:
Look, if you disagree with me, you are wrong.
Is the Pats shirt photo racist? I can’t figure out its meaning…..
@ Rodrigo Ramirez:
As the shirts cannot be sold in North America even as a joke, they are donated to third world countries.
Yu Darvish has a girlfriend.
@ Rice Cube:
Oh, you mean the “Pats are Super Bowl Champs” t-shirts. That makes sense.
Thanks. I’m dumb
If racist means having a laugh at the expense of someone of another race (and you’re not black), then yes, it is racist.
I’m not sure whose expense the laugh is at, though. I kind of feel like it is laughing at First World Problems, but I could be rationaliizing.
Also, the kid in the middle is hilarious and I wish I had the original photo to use for other funny captions in the future.
@ mb21:
Just read your post on the Hamilton situation. Touche by the way.
My question to you (knowing you are a Breaking Bad fan) is how do you deal with enjoying this show so much without getting the overwhelming urge to relapse? I’ve never been really addicted to anything so I don’t know how you it affects you.
My logic tells me it would give a drug addict urges similar to a sex addict watching porn, a child molester watching children, a hungry person watching the Food channel, etc. Does it affect you that way?
@ Suburban kid:
I think it’s possible to appreciate the humor in a situation without actually being a racist. I also think your statement about it laughing at First World problems is more on the money. It’s also likely that we’re overanalyzing this. I am not laughing at the picture because I think poor starving people are funny, but rather because the Patriots lost and now they don’t get cool swag. Conversely, the poor starving people are now going to get free merchandise with which to keep clothed, so that’s a good thing.
@ Suburban kid:
I feel like the object of the joke is the Patriots and Patriots fans, but that the picture is a funny, unexpected picture of a boy living in very poor conditions, presumably somewhere in Africa, nonetheless doing a happy dance. He’s funny, but I don’t know if we’re laughing directly at him. More like using his unexpected mirth to make fun of another group. The fact that we are surprised by his behavior may be, if not racist, at least ethnocentric. Overall the joke is mild toward the boy, I’d say, because the humor isn’t from him being stupid or less than the typical reader. If the joke were “The boy thinks the Patriots won because foreigners are stupid” I’d be more alarmed. I give this a 2/5 on the racists scale.
@ Rice Cube:
At least I’m not alone in overanalyzing that.
@ Rice Cube:
@ josh:
We can’t argue with us today.
@ Rice Cube:
@ josh:
@ josh:
@ Rice Cube:
You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.
Thanks for the analysis. I think after reading both of your positions I will avoid putting it on my facebook. However, I really want to piss off the Pats fans.
There was an Onion video Titled “Eli Manning asks his dad if he can stop playing football now.” Totally the opposite direction, but still funny.
jtsunami wrote:
Thanks and great question. I think the answer is that I’m not around it. If Walter and Jesse were real people and I was hanging out with them I’d be in trouble. It’s never really occurred to me until you asked, but I think that’s it. Also, you battle the addiction every day. It gets easier, but it’s a part of you and it always will be. I’ve never watched BB and then thought about using. Sorry I don’t have a better answer.
Rice Cube wrote:
I presume you also read Playboy for the articles, eh Thurston?
I was just reading the fangraphs post on Junior Lake, and I noticed that they have a comment vote type system, so I looked at the source. Fangraphs is based on Word Press, and they are using a plugin called Comments Vote. I looked it up, it’s not listed as compatible with the current Word Press version. I tried it on my own blog. I basically got the thumb’s down icon only, and it was right next to the comment name (in between name and picture). Clicking on it did nothing. I have no idea how to tell the plugin where to appear. Fangraphs has it under he comment, above the reply buttons. There has to be a way to force it. Anyway, it seemed like fairly simple javascript, so I didn’t know if you had seen that, MB.
@ Pearl Clutcher:
Yes. And the boobies.
@ josh:
That plugin is broken somehow. I’m sure it’s an easy fix, but I can’t get it to do anything.
more allegations on the way for the ‘sconny aad?
http://www.chicagotribune.com/sports/college/chi-more-accusations-against-former-wisconsin-official-20120206,0,7933857.story
Adrian Cardenas ——–> Cubs
Blake DeWitt ——–> DFA
5 out of 12 featured players on the 2012 Cubs calendar are gone.
@ Aisle424:
Just read that. Unexpected. I don’t know much about Cardenas.
I don’t remember the $$ rules for DFA. The Cubs have to pay DeWitt more than if they non-tendered him, though not as much as if they carried him until some cutoff date in ST.
Rice Cube wrote:
Maybe the Fiat marketing department that commissioned the ad haven’t been to Detroit yet.
Aisle424 wrote:
Don’t worry, that calendar will remind its owners of every savored moment of the magical 2011 season.
KG doesn’t have a high opinion of Cardenas.
Sounds like a AAAA guy, who can hit but sucks on defense.
i like the move
Berselius wrote:
I thought the $1.1MM they settled on was guaranteed no matter what?
Berselius wrote:
It’s not like they cut Castro to make room for him, they cut DeWitt, who is barely serviceable at best, and terrible at worst.
Sounds like the Cubs traded shit for newer shit
Berselius wrote:
Might just work
I like Cardenas as a utitl guy. In 2010 he was # 4 on Fangraphs top 10 for Oak.
Re: T-shirts
When I was a Peace Corps volunteer in West Africa years ago it was fun to find folks wearing Tshirts that had sayings that didn’t match the wearer. Like the old guy wearing a Tshirt that said “Baby on Board” and had an arrow pointing to his belly. Ones complaining about snow were pretty funny too.
We’d also shop the “Dead White Man’s Market” for funny T shirts too. The clothes were cheap, and there was a constant resupply of shirts if you followed certain teams. Pretty sure I had the whole series of 1985-1993 “Cubs: This is the year” shirts. They were a dime a dozen, literally.
@ AndCounting:
My first thought was “So you’re telling me America is going to end in the year 2246? Screw you, you anti-American pessimist.”
Darren Rovell goes to the laundromat.
From MLBTR
@ Berselius:
I know.
@ Berselius:
He’s played more third, maybe? I only read what MLBTR wrote, but they pointed out 2nd and 3rd as his positions.
Thoyer trying to find Mark Bellhorn 2.0
8volumesthick wrote:
That’s about the ceiling, I would imagine.
Aisle424 wrote:
http://www.wired.com/images_blogs/wiredscience/2012/02/jurassic_cricket.mp3
shawndgoldman wrote:
+1
8volumesthick wrote:
False. You can’t compare players of different races.
@ Berselius:
Well, that’s a bit better than eating a full million. I didn’t know guaranteed contracts had cutoffs like that.
Maybe they’re just trying to get as many new faces out there as possible. I mean, you can’t trade guys like DeWitt and Barney by themselves. Maybe they’re throwins on a Garza trade, but that’s about it. They can’t punt this year, vocally, so they can generate interest by just getting some new people out there. Maybe catch lightning in a bottle for a few games while they’re at it. I’m just thinking out loud here.
Rice Cube wrote:
I’m pretty sure it only applies to pre-FA players. And they’re not saving a full million because they have to pay Cardenas. Probably more like 200-300K
@ Berselius:
That’s sorta been the MO of the new regime, hasn’t it?
@ Aisle424:
That shit is hilarious. Nice find.
shawndgoldman wrote:
I don’t think Thoyer have any philosophy grad students working for them
/rimshot
@ Berselius:
Even if Cardenas starts out in AAA? I thought AAA guys made like $50K tops.
josh wrote:
http://www.wired.com/images_blogs/wiredscience/files/first1Myr.wav
@ Berselius:
Too many words, not enough numbers.
Aisle424 wrote:
I take it back. Cardenas makes way more contact than Bellhorn ever did
Rice Cube wrote:
Not if he’s on the 40-man roster, which he will be.
@ Berselius:
The Cubs are giving away slots on their 40 man like they don’t have anyone worth being on one.
What does DeWitt get paid if he accepts a minor league assignment?
Berselius wrote:
Ah, okay. How much is the 40-man minimum salary? Same as league minimum?
“halftime in america” ad filmed in new orleans and los angeles
http://www.weeklystandard.com/blogs/detroit-comeback-ad-filmed-new-orleans-la_621036.html
@ josh:
I have seen it and I’ll check it out again.
To add to your facepalm pantheon:
[img]http://l.yimg.com/j/assets/ipt/brady_0206.jpg[/img]
This probably would have been appropriate to post after Aisley’s re-tweets of fail last night.
She feels Tom’s pain.
Your new mobile setup is really cool btw.
@ Aisle424:
I did not watch this, but I sincerely hope that the nice doggy in the Youtube thumbnail was not harmed.
Mobile Rice wrote:
Except my SPECIAL LINK IS GONE
@ Rice Cube:
As of a few years ago it was $50,000.
So, I’m owed an apology for saying DeWitt wouldn’t be on the opening day roster.
Question is: Should he retire since he’s so bad the cubbies can’t even use him?
@ GBTS:
Don’t worry. It will reappear before too long. It’s not going anywhere. Ever.
GBTS’ personal link appears on the desktop version, I didn’t really notice it missing on mobile as I use the arrow buttons that were conveniently provided to me.
If this was the plan, why not decline DeWitt Arbritration?
@ Pezcore:
I don’t think they knew Cardenas would be DFA’ed or available for sure until after the arbitration deadline, but $1.1MM isn’t that big of a deal in baseball terms, I guess. I think the Cubs needed whatever infield depth they could scrounge up and DeWitt was probably better or at least MLB-ready compared to what was available in-house.
Plus if berselius is correct and MLBTR isn’t lying, a DFA now would mean the Cubs only have to eat about $200K of DeWitt’s contract, though I’m not sure if Cardenas would only cost $50K as MB suggested for being on the 40-man, or if he gets paid league minimum if they expect him to be the starting 2B out of spring training.
So based on not much more than the mlbtr write-up, it looks like the Cubs just shed half a million or so and lost a little defensive skill at areas they had covered anyway in exchange for a guy who adds OBP, has three more years of club control, and is two years younger?
This could be my favorite Superfriends move yet, at least until MB digs up data that show that he struck out over 300 times every year since his sophomore year in high school that is. (dying laughing)
@ Rice Cube:
Yeah, they pay one-sixth of DeWitt’s contract. I believe if you get toward the end of spring training it starts going up, but right now it’s just a sixth of what he was scheduled to earn.
@ fang2415:
(dying laughing) I don’t even know who the Cubs acquired. Apparently they got rid of DeWitt, but I was too lazy to the read the comments here. I figured if it was a big deal someone would have written a post about it. As such, I assume it’s another Alfredo Amezaga type player, but according to you is younger and has more club control years.
@ mb21:
This guy:
http://www.baseball-reference.com/minors/player.cgi?utm_source=direct&utm_medium=linker&utm_campaign=Linker&id=carden001adr
Hard not to like that. Cardenas has 6 years of club control and 3 of those are at league minimum. It’s not like DeWitt was going to add much value.
@ mb21:
Maybe it’ll work with your theme, or you can figure out how to fix it. The guys at fangraphs are much smarter than me. Anyway, it seemed broken, so if you already passed it over, forget I said anything.
The Cardenas move seems like the kind of financially sound decision we’ve been wanting to see. Incremental improvements, eventually to be supplemented by a stronger farm team. Most of the moves have been solid moves so far.
Win
[img]http://i42.tinypic.com/v5bsqx.jpg[/img]
@ GBTS:
Just saw and reposted that on facebook
@ Recalcitrant Blogger Nate:
Correct.
I guess mobile site really is missing GBTS’ special links. Bummer.
My mobile device is a pencil. It has a long battery life, but sometimes stabs me in the leg. Links are worthless on it.
I wonder if the Cubs could talk Roy Oswalt into a very reasonable pillow contract.
@ Rice Cube:
Sounded like he was dead set on Texas or STL. Maybe he has changed his mind since Texas said they were not interested. But if they aren’t interested, then it’s probably because he’s asking too much or too many years.
[img]http://chzichcafterdark.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/funny-pictures-pundit-kitchen-after-dark-kids-these-days.png[/img]
@ josh:
Yeah, I was just thinking out loud because it didn’t look like any teams wanted to bite just yet. Also, I doubt the Cubs get in the mix as it’s unlikely that they can snag a comp pick from Oswalt with the new $12MM contract rule.
@ Rice Cube:
I’m sure they’ve fished to see if they can get him on the cheap, but I think eventually he’ll break down and expand his market. Doesn’t it seem like Thoyer is looking more for younger players with potential upside? I don’t see them taking much of a risk for a guy near the end of his career.
@ Rice Cube:
Is the President eating lunch with William Peterson?
@ josh:
I think a contender will probably give him a one-year contract for around $5-8MM and he’ll just take it at this point. Spring training is just around the corner. But if he were to get antsy and was available for $4MM I don’t think it’s a big risk. Just extremely unlikely.
Similarly, guys like Brandon Webb and Mark Prior are trying to make comebacks, and while i’ts fun to fantasize about catching the proverbial lightning in a bottle, it probably won’t happen. Just idle thoughts.
@ josh:
I have no idea of the context of this picture. I just found it amusing that the kid is wearing a Cubs shirt and is all honey badger about being next to the President.
They’ve had enough, GBTS. They even put up a sign.
[img]https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/407444_10150728214932907_70425092906_12377453_1405721008_n.jpg[/img]
Bubbles loves a good re-arranging of the deck chairs
Mobile Rice wrote:
The new mobile site looks good, but for some reason on my Droid X2 the frame doesn’t fill in the entire screen. It’s kind of annoying since I can’t zoom in or anything.
What the fuck is up with avatars and shit?
We might need a tweak to the site that resizes images to a decent size. I'm kind of scared of posting this portrait of WaLi in case it breaks the site. [img]https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-qGPIISgiX6w/Tw86Yw-Ih4I/AAAAAAAA28k/tV7qZgeKcU8/s400/mullet%2520toupee.jpg[/img] NVM, found a smaller version.
@ Suburban kid:
I’ve saying it here first, the mullet is coming back. I’m a trend setter.
I look so pissed because the photographer is talking about the Cubs signing Cespedes and Soler and then flipping the three cubans for Nolasco.
@ WaLi:
That’s a helluva mullet. I can’t see it now though. The site seems all fucked up.
Also, I believe new shit is up ————-> http://www.obstructedview.net/chicago-cubs/dfp-2-7-2012.html
[img]https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-qGPIISgiX6w/Tw86Yw-Ih4I/AAAAAAAA28k/tV7qZgeKcU8/s400/mullet%2520toupee.jpg[/img]