Daily Facepalm Returns with a Fiery Vengeance

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Cubs and Matt Garza Agree to Terms

It's no longterm contract extension, but the Cubs are tweeting that they've agreed to terms for 2012 with Matt Garza, thereby sticking it to the arbitor. Hurrah.

 

 

Yet Another Cuban Not Named Mark

The Cubs signed the Cuban kid Gerardo Concepcion. You can read all about reading about him here. 

 

Cubs' Blatant Neglect of Asia Continues

I don't know what the Cubs bother searching for talent anywhere but the Pacific Rim and Finland, but apparently there's some desire to recruit and foster talent in the Dominican Republic despite the shame Sammy Sosa brought us. Aisley says it makes him slightly less angry that Mark Cuban doesn't own the Cubs. I don't get it.

Video I Enjoyed Recently

I was told I remind someone of the honey badger. Okay. 

UPDATE: Is There a Cubs Game Today?

No.

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  1. Berselius

    Cubs’ Blatant Neglect of Asia Continues

    You’re behind the times here. Hungarian baseball players are the new market inefficiency.

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  4. Berselius

    AndCounting wrote:

    I saw mb’s post after I posted mine. It’s the annual February explosion of posts.

    The stars aligned and you both had mexican food last night. Hopefully Aisley did not, he’s still on dinner embargo for something that I’ve already forgotten.

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  5. Author
    AndCounting

    Berselius wrote:

    AndCounting wrote:

    I saw mb’s post after I posted mine. It’s the annual February explosion of posts.

    The stars aligned and you both had mexican food last night. Hopefully Aisley did not, he’s still on dinner embargo for something that I’ve already forgotten.

    He’s been taking the excessive posting metaphor a little too literally lately. His current embargo isn’t disciplinary so much as it is a dietary caution.

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  6. Aisle424

    AndCounting wrote:

    He’s been taking the excessive posting metaphor a little too literally lately. His current embargo isn’t disciplinary so much as it is a dietary caution.

    Really this is unnecessary. Don’t you have your own site for snark?

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  7. Aisle424

    The snark debate is on over at BCB:

    [img]http://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-0o0mvd0QuWw/TywI8-DUQgI/AAAAAAAAB1g/x63VnpuVP88/s800/al2.JPG[/img]

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  11. fang2415

    God I love Alvin more and more each time he does something like this. It’s so awesome that he actually takes so much time going so far out of his way to be a dick.

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  13. Berselius

    bubblesdachimp wrote:

    Berselius just retweeted some interesting Garza/Soriano thoughts

    And put it in the wrong thread (dying laughing)

    Hearing an interesting thing this morning. If the #cubs sign Soler and Cespedes they will try to move Soriano and a lot of his money with Garza and take less in the form of prospects. Not dealing Sori would create a logjam in the outfield

    ^
    @HotStoveCubbies on twitter. He has a source, it’s not a rumor!

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  14. dylanj

    I dont see the point in using Garza to dump Soriano if the OF is crowed. First, the cubs aren’t going to get Soler AND Cespedes. Second, if they get Soler he’s 19 and a long ways away from the bigs. If they get Cespedes he’s going to need some time in AAA and even then you can just release Soriano. You don’t ruin Garza’s value by attaching Soriano to him.

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  16. fang2415

    Rice Cube wrote:

    It’s really too bad that you’ve all fallen off the snark wagon.

    I haven’t paid close enough attention to Aisle424’s snark abuse. I know I wouldn’t have wanted my snark addiction on the front pages or discussed on various forums like is inevitable for someone as famous as Aisle424. That in itself is tough to deal with and I have a ton of respect for Aisle424. It’s already difficult enough staying serious, but the amount of pressure he has on him, the number of eyes watching him and waiting for him to make fun of somebody makes it far more difficult than anything I ever went through. Aisley undoubtedly has a support group as I did, but unlike me most of the world is watching and waiting for him to say sarcastic shit so they have something to discuss. I’m sure people over the years doubted whether or not I could remain serious and for good reason, but I didn’t have Alvin rooting against me like he is for Aisle424. Sure, everybody says they want him to live a healthy life, but being funny moves blog traffic. The journalist bloggers love it. The fans love it. It’s funny. It makes the blogger human and we can more easily laugh at them in ways we can laugh at Alvin, but not ourselves of course.

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  19. Berselius

    dylanj wrote:

    I dont see the point in using Garza to dump Soriano if the OF is crowed. First, the cubs aren’t going to get Soler AND Cespedes. Second, if they get Soler he’s 19 and a long ways away from the bigs. If they get Cespedes he’s going to need some time in AAA and even then you can just release Soriano. You don’t ruin Garza’s value by attaching Soriano to him.

    I think the OF is already crowded whether or not the Cubs sign Cespedes. There are already at least 3 better OF than Soriano on the Cubs roster. The value of Soriano + Garza is the same whether they’re together or separate, the Cubs would just be getting value back in terms of salary relief instead of prospects.

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  23. Aisle424

    fang2415 wrote:

    Sorry MB. I was about to do the whole thing but I realized I’d go to hell even faster for that.

    If you have something constructive to add to the discussion, feel free.

    Otherwise….

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  31. Berselius

    bubblesdachimp wrote:

    Berselius wrote:
    GBTS wrote:
    @ bubblesdachimp:
    Do you like like him?
    He’s no Tim Tebow

    Tim Tebow is great. He should go talk to Josh Hamilton

    (dying laughing), and while he’s add it, he can fly to Indy to lay his hands on Rob Gronkowski’s ankle and Peyton Manning’s neck.

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  34. Mucker

    That was brilliant Aisley!! I laughed my ass off. Al is such a dick. Does anybody know if the other SBNation sites’ moderators are as pathetic as Al? Do they all troll their own sites and make posts telling people to knock it off?

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  37. Rice Cube

    Fart Football

    An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, “Seven Points.” His wife rolls over and says, “What in the world was that?” The old man replied, “It’s fart football.” A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says “Touchdown, tie score.” After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, “Aha. I’m ahead 14 to 7” Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, “Touchdown, tie score.” Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, “Field goal, I lead 17 to 14.” Now the pressure is on the old man.

    He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard. Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he’s got, and accidentally shits in the bed. The wife says, “What the hell was that?” The old man says, “Half time, switch sides.”

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  45. pinetar

    [img]http://cloud-downloads.clubcasualgames.com/filestore/images/games/snark-busters-welcome-to-the-club/snark-busters-welcome-to-the-club-giant.jpg[/img]

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  60. Mish

    Al’s the infinite gift giver. It’s amazing how it all works.

    I was half surprised that Aisley still has a non-banned account there, but I guess he’s much less of a forward asshole than I or Ryno. (dying laughing)

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  65. Aisle424

    I get to annoy him more often, but less spectacularly. I’m sure he thinks I fear a banning, but I just don’t care. He may have already banned me for all I know.

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  66. fang2415

    Aisle424 wrote:

    GBTS wrote:
    Bitch.
    really, this was unnecessary. Don’t you have your own site for calling people bitches?

    (dying laughing)
    (dying laughing)

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  68. mb21

    Mish wrote:

    Ryno, OTOH, didn’t even give the pretense of giving fucks.

    He wrote a fan post (or diary I think they were called at the time) about organizing a fucking picnic. That was an awesome day. Alvin was not happy. At all.

    CCD got banned for offering to bring cole slaw. (dying laughing)

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  69. Berselius

    mb21 wrote:

    Mish wrote:
    Ryno, OTOH, didn’t even give the pretense of giving fucks.

    He wrote a fan post (or diary I think they were called at the time) about organizing a fucking picnic. That was an awesome day. Alvin was not happy. At all.
    CCD got banned for offering to bring cole slaw. (dying laughing)

    Speaking of, I love his new tumblr site

    http://holycoleslaw.tumblr.com/

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  71. mb21

    @ Aisle424:
    There used to be some chick who posted there nonstop under the name of kerrysotherwife. This person was dumb. I mean really, really dumb. And she was in love with Alvin. My favorite KOW comment was her talking about how she’d been to 1100 games at Wrigley and they had a record in those games of 578-522. I don’t remember if those are the exactly numbers. It’s been several years, but it was something that ended up being close to a .525 winning percentage.

    It was a comment that was so obviously bullshit that I don’t know why I wasted the time, but I calculated the Cubs home winning percentage between the years she says she attended these games and it was something like .475. (dying laughing)

    She made Alvin look smart. So anyway, Ryno signed up there as kerrysotherwifesotherhusband. he still has that account and will fuck with Al on SB Nation from time to time. He posted this diary about organizing a BCB picnic. It was pretty bad. Several people from ACB left comments and CCD did too and offered to bring coleslaw. I think half of the people on ACB were banned from BCB that day. Ryno got a personalized message that read: This is the worst thing to every happen on the this blog.

    I used to have some screen caps of it, but I’m not sure I do anymore.

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  74. Recalcitrant Blogger Nate

    @ josh:
    definitely the misspelling was part of original message, hence the meme here occasionally. I think I was banned about a year later for referencing cole slaw/aforementioned post (dying laughing)

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  76. Mucker

    mb21 wrote:

    @ Aisle424:
    There used to be some chick who posted there nonstop under the name of kerrysotherwife. This person was dumb. I mean really, really dumb. And she was in love with Alvin. My favorite KOW comment was her talking about how she’d been to 1100 games at Wrigley and they had a record in those games of 578-522. I don’t remember if those are the exactly numbers. It’s been several years, but it was something that ended up being close to a .525 winning percentage.
    It was a comment that was so obviously bullshit that I don’t know why I wasted the time, but I calculated the Cubs home winning percentage between the years she says she attended these games and it was something like .475. (dying laughing)
    She made Alvin look smart. So anyway, Ryno signed up there as kerrysotherwifesotherhusband. he still has that account and will fuck with Al on SB Nation from time to time. He posted this diary about organizing a BCB picnic. It was pretty bad. Several people from ACB left comments and CCD did too and offered to bring coleslaw. I think half of the people on ACB were banned from BCB that day. Ryno got a personalized message that read: This is the worst thing to every happen on the this blog.
    I used to have some screen caps of it, but I’m not sure I do anymore.

    That was fucking classic. Who posted the haircut fanshot asking BCBers what haircut he should get his son? That one was fucking classic too. I got banned for calling Al a fucking retard. (dying laughing)

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  79. mb21

    @ Mish:
    (dying laughing) I tended to stay away from the Alvin bashing for awhile. I still had the “privileges” to comment on BCB even after the picnic thread. But finally one day Alvin was being such a fucking retard so I was forced to tell him (like Mucker).

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  80. Mucker

    mb21 wrote:

    @ Mish:
    (dying laughing) I tended to stay away from the Alvin bashing for awhile. I still had the “privileges” to comment on BCB even after the picnic thread. But finally one day Alvin was being such a fucking retard so I was forced to tell him (like Mucker).

    I actually really liked BCB at first. It was new to me and being able to talk Cubs baseball with fans was great because I’m from Maryland and there aren’t too many Cubs fans around. But then after awhile you realize the Jonestown atmosphere around that place and I had enough. That’s when I found ACB and my life changed. Then after realizing most of the people on ACB were banned BCBers, I felt it was time for me to join that illustrious BCB Wall of Fame and get banned. Now, I reminisce on the days of fucking with Al and his minions with people that understand that there is a better way to blog about Cubs baseball. I hope when people read this story, they think “Cool story, bro” or “this is a story I recently enjoyed”.

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  82. bubblesdachimp

    Not that anyone will care but i recently re read the Basebll america cubs chat. Hayden Simpson pitched with a tear in his elbow last year. Maybe he will be awesome this year?

    Probably will suck ass but they say he is healthy now…

    Also Starling Casto is dope

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  86. Mish

    Mucker wrote:

    mb21 wrote:
    @ Mish:
    (dying laughing) I tended to stay away from the Alvin bashing for awhile. I still had the “privileges” to comment on BCB even after the picnic thread. But finally one day Alvin was being such a fucking retard so I was forced to tell him (like Mucker).
    I actually really liked BCB at first. It was new to me and being able to talk Cubs baseball with fans was great because I’m from Maryland and there aren’t too many Cubs fans around. But then after awhile you realize the Jonestown atmosphere around that place and I had enough. That’s when I found ACB and my life changed. Then after realizing most of the people on ACB were banned BCBers, I felt it was time for me to join that illustrious BCB Wall of Fame and get banned. Now, I reminisce on the days of fucking with Al and his minions with people that understand that there is a better way to blog about Cubs baseball. I hope when people read this story, they think “Cool story, bro” or “this is a story I recently enjoyed”.

    This should have been a FanShot.

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  87. Mish

    I lurked at BCB for a long time without posting, but I wasn’t regularly there. I don’t know how I found ACB, but I do remember registering on the day Z was demoted to the bullpen. At that point I could no longer be a spectator of the shit said here, I must be a part of it.

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  88. Berselius

    That was fucking classic. Who posted the haircut fanshot asking BCBers what haircut he should get his son?

    Alvin (dying laughing). Unless there was a joke haircut post that I’m forgetting

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  89. Mucker

    Berselius wrote:

    That was fucking classic. Who posted the haircut fanshot asking BCBers what haircut he should get his son?
    Alvin (dying laughing). Unless there was a joke haircut post that I’m forgetting

    I know Alvin at first was talking about Mark’s haircut. I thought somebody made a joke post asking what they should do with their son’s hair and being surpised by how many people actually were interested in the topic. (dying laughing)

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  91. Suburban kid

    I was on BCB from the time it started. I had read Al’s previous blog for a few months before that. I liked it because there were adults posting. When Al started getting attacked by the other blogs, I initially was on his side. I thought a lot of the attacks were childish. I hated it when they brought Al’s kid into it.

    I started turning when Gaius Marius started his Shakespeare or biblical attack on Al. I can’t remember what they were fighting about, and I’m sure I thought GM was being childish, but so was Al. Plus, it was hilarious.

    Then I met Al in person a few years ago and I did not like him at all. That’s when I started to lurk on ACB and haven’t really spent any significant time at BCB since. When I go over there now, it just seems really shitty in every way.

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  93. mb21

    I just logged out and didn’t see anything. I’m using FF on Mac. I assume Pinetar is using FF on Windows. I haven’t seen it on Safari either. Cone, can you take a screen cap or let me know exactly what the message is?

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  94. Berselius

    Suburban kid wrote:

    I was on BCB from the time it started. I had read Al’s previous blog for a few months before that. I liked it because there were adults posting. When Al started getting attacked by the other blogs, I initially was on his side. I thought a lot of the attacks were childish. I hated it when they brought Al’s kid into it.
    I started turning when Gaius Marius started his Shakespeare or biblical attack on Al. I can’t remember what they were fighting about, and I’m sure I thought GM was being childish, but so was Al. Plus, it was hilarious.
    Then I met Al in person a few years ago and I did not like him at all. That’s when I started to lurk on ACB and haven’t really spent any significant time at BCB since. When I go over there now, it just seems really shitty in every way.

    I was a regular at BCB in 2008 and was drinking the Al Kool-Aid. I wandered over to ACB the first time during the GTOD and was horrified (dying laughing). I finally realized Al was a moron after the whole Flip Cain for Nolasco post, and started looking for other Cubs blogs. I was hanging out at GROTA because Colin was briefly there (hard to believe) and started commenting over here after some people were laughing at me for calling Rich Harden a 5th starter in the GROTA shoutbox (dying laughing).

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  95. Berselius

    I liked it because there were adults posting.

    At some point before BCB I was reading the cubs.com forums. My brain seems to have blocked everything other than that I visited there, probably for a reason.

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  100. Urk

    Since were all telling our (cool) stories (bros), I ended up here via 1060 west, which I found totally by accident. I was googling to try to find the full text of “Waiting for Godot” & found that someone there had posted it (without explanation or attribution) in the comments there. Maybe it was just the second act, but it seemed like a pretty fitting comment on the 2006 Cubs. I migrated over to whatever-ACB-was-before-it-was-ACB via the fight with The Hawk, who I think showed up over there first, and a dustup between Gaius Marius and MD that mainly took place over at the pre-ACB blog. What was that blog called?! Anyway, thanks to this trajectory, BCB has never been anything but a punchline for me.

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  105. pinetar

    @ mb21:
    Says I need to update to a current browser. Running most current version of firefox as it is. I have a screeenshot of the page if you want it.

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  106. pinetar

    The message states
    “Please update to a modern browser”
    The site you are visiting can only be viewed using a modern browser. Please upgrade your browser to increase safely and your browsing experiences. Choose one of the browsers above. If you don’t care CLICK HERE.

    When you click on the click here it takes you straight in to the site. I don’t see any message if I’m logged in. I tried it on 2 different PC’s my work and home and both were the same.

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