Fuck the Cubs. Fuck Crane Kenney. Fuck whichever of Crane Kenney's dipshit fucking minions came up with Clark the fucking bear. This is fucking embarassing.
Like it's not bad enough to be stuck being a fan of a horseshit team thats own ass-backwards mismanagement forced it to be the only fucking baseball team that regularly played in the daytime as a kid. Like it isn't bad enough that we root for a team that hasn't sniffed a fucking World Series win since before fucking World War I even started or the fucking Titanic was built.
Like it's not bad enough that the team continues to be so bum-fuzzled that they can't figure out a way to renovate their own fucking ballpark using their own fucking money because they are dominated by a bunch of local bar owners who successfully got the team to sign a fucking contract that allows them to fucking legally steal the Cubs product.
Like it isn't bad enough that we are going to enter into our THIRD fucking season where they will PURPOSEFULLY be fucking awful and charge prices more excessive than most teams that have won a fucking World Series in our fucking lifetimes.
Now, as we starve for anything – ANYTHING – that would make the Cubs team even a tiny bit interesting this year as we march toward another 95+ loss season, we get this fucking mascot bullshit. It took about 3 seconds for Cubs fans to make the Poochie connection where the Simpsons mocked adding superfluous characters to artificially inflate interest in a show that was losing viewers' interest. I don't know who actually made the first connection, but the first I saw was @ChicagoVince:
Who wore the backwards hat better; @ClarkTheCub or #Poochie? http://t.co/iFVkCvCcLz pic.twitter.com/yz82qW97Mm
— Vince LiFonti (@ChicagoVince) January 13, 2014
Seriously, this has Wally fucking Hayward's fingerprints all over it. This could only come from the genius mind behind Chicago's Olympic bid and the "It's a Way of Life" campaign. I imagine the meeting to discuss this new mascot went something like this:
Tom Ricketts: I have figured out how to rejuvenate ticket sales! It's so simple, you egghead marketers would've never thought of it! What we need is… a new mascot! One that today's kids can relate to!
Alison Miller, Senior Director, Marketing: Are you absolutely sure that's wise, sir? I mean, I don't want to sound pretentious here, but the ivy and history of Wrigley form a classical baseball mythology dyad.
Crane Kenney: Hey, this ain't art, it's business! (to Tom) Whaddya got in mind? Sexy Lincoln Park Trixie? Douchebag Drunken Bro?
Ricketts: No, no. We're the Chicago Cubs. It should be a Cubbie Bear.
Julian Green, VP Communications and Community Affairs: Uh, a bear? Isn't that a tad predictable?
Wally Hayward, CEO, W Partners: In your dreams. We're talking the original bear from hell.
Miller: You mean Mike McCaskey?
Hayward: We want a bear with attitude. He's edgy. He's "in your face." You've heard the expression "let's get busy?" Well, this is a bear who gets "biz-zay!" Consistently and thoroughly.
Kenney: So he's proactive, huh?
Hayward: Oh, God, yes. We're talking about a totally outrageous paradigm.
Kevin Saghy, Manager, Communications: Excuse me, but "proactive" and "paradigm"? Aren't these just buzzwords that dumb people use to sound important? (fidgets) Not that I'm accusing you of anything like that. (fidgets again) I'm fired, aren't I?
Ricketts: (to Kevin) Oh, yes.
Ricketts: The rest of you start thinking up a name for this funky bear; I dunno, something along the line of say… Clark, only more proactive.
Kenney: Yeah!
(Ricketts, Kenney and Hayward leave.)
Miller: So, Clark The Cub okay with everybody?
Everyone in unison: Yeah…
It's such a kick in the dick that they're even pulling this shit. They know god damn well that they aren't getting Tanaka. They know god damn well that Baez, Bryant, etc. etc. won't even debut until half the season is tanked at the very earliest, and even if they arrive this year they'll just be thrown in this shitfest of a season where anything less than Hall of Fame heroics will be met by the fanbase with derision. They know god damn well that Samardzija is already halfway out the door. So here's a fuzzy, cuddly, snuggle bear to distract you.
And I've seen here and on Twitter that this is meant for children so get the fuck over it. OK, then explain why the fucking thing will be on Twitter and Facebook? What fucking kids younger than 10 years old are on Twitter and Facebook?
This is all part of the bullshit the marketing department absolutely has to come up with because they KNOW the team is going to blow. They fucking know it and this is as bold-faced an admission as you are ever going to see a team make. It's not even fucking February and the 2014 season has all but been declared dead by the team itself. For the third straight year.
IVY!
MANUAL SCOREBOARD!
WRIGLEY IS 100 YEARS OLD!
DAY BASEBALL!
SUNSHINE!
OLD STYLE BEER!
URINAL TROUGHS!
SNUGGLY, FUZZY, GLAZED EYED, BACKWARD HAT BEAR!
COMMITTED!
The Cubs insist this is the result of fan surveys and feedback. Who the fuck took these surveys and said that a day at the ballpark was missing a scared-looking Cubs mascot with a backwards hat? Did anybody check to make sure that Cardinals fans weren't filling these surveys out as a joke? Are these the same surveys that placed an inordinate amount of importance on fucking urinal troughs? At what point will these people come to the realization that Cubs fans are either insane, stupid as fuck, or both?
Holy fucking hell. If this is what Cubs fans really care about then we just don't even deserve a winning team.
If we're going to go with any Clark as a mascot, it should be Clark Griswold:
Hey! If any of you are looking for any late Christmas gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Tom Ricketts, the Cubs Executive Chairman, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy Committed! slumber over there in Wilmette with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is!
That's a Clark I could get behind as a mascot.
Comments
It’s a cartoon bear.
GBTSQuote Reply
get em killer
dylanjQuote Reply
Aisle424Quote Reply
GBTS wrote:
Perfect for a cartoon team.
Aisle424Quote Reply
[img]https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Bd6IlzrCUAAFTL7.jpg:large[/img]
Aisle424Quote Reply
GBTS wrote:
I don’t understand. Weren’t you spending hours creating photos because of It’s a way of life? It’s only a sentence.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ Aisle424:
(dying laughing)
dmick89Quote Reply
What dmick said in the last post is what pisses me off. We wait all fucking off-season and this is the news. A ridiculously bad mascot.
joshQuote Reply
@ Aisle424:
The bear will be the best player on the team.
joshQuote Reply
Fuck the bear. Fuck him to hell. Then fuck his grandpa until he comes back to life, then fuck him back to hell too.
joshQuote Reply
[img]https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-U36ngfXudXg/UtSuKjlZF1I/AAAAAAAAAng/gDi_yKQ1lKw/w633-h456-no/clark.jpg[/img]
Aisle424Quote Reply
i realize it’s probably just an awkward fit but it kind of looks like they photoshopped a cubs hat onto that little girl’s head.
EnricoPallazzoQuote Reply
@ Aisle424:
Are any of those guys Cubs players? I honestly don’t think I could identify 38/40 players on the Cubs 40 man since they aren’t worth recognizing
AkabariQuote Reply
@ Akabari:
Isn’t Kris Bryant the one that’s next to Clark? I don’t recognize the other two.
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ Aisle424:
Looks like a character from Uncle Touchy’s puzzle basement.
joshQuote Reply
Speaking of “Committed”….Don’t we need a 2014 slogan? “Because we have to” doesn’t seem right anymore, after all, 424 doesn’t even have season tix anymore.
SVBQuote Reply
@ Aisle424:
Isn’t the guy on the right Arismendy Alcantara?
SVBQuote Reply
@ SVB:
Yesterday I’d have said the easy winner would be the first person to suggest they get a mascot.
dmick89Quote Reply
(dying laughing) on this whole thread.
@ EnricoPallazzo: For the record, Enrico, I agree with Akabari about using Google/Droid and syncking/sharing (despite being a very long time Mac user and owning Mac products for all my computing needs). I haven’t missed the BB one bit. Neither has dmick, because he doesn’t have to hear me whine about how OV doesn’t work on RIM technology.
Finally, I can’t wait to watch Clark and his buddies Addison and Sheff race around the warning track in the 5th inning. I just hope they can beat Teddy Roosevelt.
SVBQuote Reply
@ dmick89:
more (dying laughing)
SVBQuote Reply
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
[img]http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19cgbbfp6eb34gif/ku-medium.gif[/img]
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ SVB:
i think you may be right. is kyle hendricks the guy in the middle?
i don’t think that the guy on the left is bryant but i can’t really tell.
EnricoPallazzoQuote Reply
[img]http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19cgbjrlxs7zkgif/ku-medium.gif[/img]
[img]http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19ch6fvdxzoepgif/ku-medium.gif[/img]
Aisle424Quote Reply
[img]http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19cgeos3omxxwgif/ku-medium.gif[/img]
Aisle424Quote Reply
All GIFs from http://deadspin.com/contest-do-something-horrible-to-the-cubs-new-perver-1500558877
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ Aisle424:
just made my day 🙂
Paul PopeQuote Reply
I think Clark the Cub needs to be added to the Forest Gif
Aisle424Quote Reply
Can the bear play second base? If so, good move; otherwise, ugh.
Rizzo the RatQuote Reply
@ Aisle424:
Just what I was going to say. The forest gif is now incomplete.
dmick89Quote Reply
now we just need some girls shooting t shirts out of cannons, cheerleaders & a kiss cam for our jumbotron
dylanjQuote Reply
@ Aisle424:
If that was added to comment 11, would it win the
Internets or lose it!
dmick89Quote Reply
Basically, the Cubs converted Brent Lillibridge to mascot.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
Oh God. Probably both.
Aisle424Quote Reply
I’m kind of ooged out by the live mascot costume now. He looks like a demented woodchuck.
Rice CubeQuote Reply
I’m just going to tell people I’m an Marlins fan now. Slightly less embarrassing.
Rizzo the RatQuote Reply
@ EnricoPallazzo:
Could be Hendricks. I can’t tell. The problem is that pictures of pitchers online usually show them throwing, with some grimace from the effort. In the comment above their is no grimace, though perhaps there should be.
.
.
.
I’m going to ask my daughter what she thinks of Clark. She’s 7. We’ll get a definitive answer from her.
SVBQuote Reply
@ Rizzo the Rat:
Whatever you say…
[img]http://assets.sbnation.com/assets/739480/marlins.gif[/img]
SVBQuote Reply
@ SVB:
Maybe I’ll just jump on the Astros bandwagon. They’re no better than the Cubs, but at least they’re hiring the old BaPro guys.
Rizzo the RatQuote Reply
@ Rizzo the Rat:
The ‘stros are waiting for you, Rizz
[img]http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19cgcicmhynghjpg/ku-medium.jpg[/img]
SVBQuote Reply
Do the Cubs management seriously think fans enjoy anthropomorphic animals wearing clothes? And a backwards baseball cap?!? Jesus.
Rizzo the RatQuote Reply
I blame Myles and his last post for the latest development, and particularly this line:
Cubs management heard you, Myles. They heard you loud and clear.
Are you not entertained now, motherfuckers?
Smokestack LightningQuote Reply
@ Rizzo the Rat:
If the Philly Phanatic works, then a pantsless bear is probably not going to be an issue.
I really wish they had revised the design though. Wife and I oscillate between “sad” and “terrified” when describing Clark’s expression.
Rice CubeQuote Reply
Rice Cube wrote:
He is a Cub fan after all…
Rizzo the RatQuote Reply
Dear Cubs,
It’s not me, it’s you.
Yes, your ass looks fat in those pants.
Yes, I think your sister is cuter than you.
No, I did not like your mother.
No, you are not a tiger in the sack.
No, I don’t want to hear what you have to say.
Sincerely,
The Mercurial Outfielder
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
Clark has already paid dividends. DJ and MO are back!
SVBQuote Reply
DPLEETED
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
“The Cubs insist this is the result of fan surveys and feedback. Who the fuck took these surveys and said that a day at the ballpark was missing a scared-looking Cubs mascot with a backwards hat?”
[img]http://cdn2.sbnation.com/author_profile_images/1577/alyellonheadshot.png[/img]
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
[img]http://imgs.tuts.dragoart.com/how-to-draw-pedobear-pedobear_1_000000008825_5.jpg[/img]
Yay! Cubs!
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
100+ years of sustained shittiness isn’t enough. Now we get PedoBear foisted on us as a panacea for another fucking lost season.
Not even Bill Simmons can up with a ex-girlfriend metaphor appropriate for this bullshit.
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
dmick89 wrote:
I don’t have any problem with making fun of the team, and I actually do think that they should be taking it on the chin for the execution here. But:
…seems to me like there’s a feeling that this only happened because the team is trying to cover its deficiencies on the field. I don’t buy it. I might buy the assertion that the marketing department may be tone deaf when it comes to general fan sentiment. And I absolutely buy that this is a gimmick to get butts in seats, though what the fuck else is the marketing department charged with?
Call me a dead-ender or whatever the fuck you want. I refuse to hop on the RICKETTEZZEZZ ARE THE WORST OWNERS EVARRRR train just yet.
uncle daveQuote Reply
[img]http://www.cubsbythenumbers.com/big-cubbie.gif[/img]
I thought this guy was the mascot. Or the Cub face like the one used in the OV FacePalm
SVBQuote Reply
GBTS wrote:
It’s also the only thing the Cubs have done since signing Jose “Cy” Veras and Wesley “Maddog” Wright to one year deals and hiring a manager nobody heard of, Fuck the bear.
Suburban kidQuote Reply
My God. I ask for Cubs news and I get this
My only hope now is that this causes such a sensation that it goes the way of those Texas statues and gets erased from history so fast that it actually becomes a collectors item
Crane Kenney, man… Just wow
fang2415Quote Reply
Anyway it’s good to see that the Cubs aren’t squandering the value of their 40,000-seat time machine. Unfortunately though they are apparently resetting the dials to 1993
fang2415Quote Reply
Alvin wrote:
Suburban kidQuote Reply
I have no qualms making fun of Clark because he looks stupid or like a pedophile, but it’s borderline Yellon-esque to wail that the introduction of a cartoon bear is a dishonest attempt to lure you personally (a semi-literate or above adult) into being content with a 95+ loss season.
Clark the Bear is meant for kids. He has probably been in development for over a year. They didn’t sketch him up as a Plan B after a bad meeting with Tanaka. They probably wanted to unveil him at Cubs Con but wanted to give the public a heads-up first because they have that problem with that creep who dresses up as a Cub and takes pictures with fans but isn’t in any way employed by the team.
GBTSQuote Reply
I just want to make clear I’m not insulting Aisely and calling him semi-literate. I mean to say that most adult Cub fans are fully illiterate, so being semi-literate or above places you above the mean Cubs fan (and median, and mode, for that matter), and thus not the likely targeted audience for Clark the Bear. I worded that poorly, no disrespect.
GBTSQuote Reply
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
[img]http://img.gawkerassets.com/img/19cgejasdrgo7jpg/ku-medium.jpg[/img]
GBTSQuote Reply
@ GBTS:
I completely agree with GBTS. The outrage is a little ridiculous. There’s good humor and having fun and then there’s irrational outrage. Yesterday was the latter. It went from something that could have brought hilarious discussion to just plain annoying.
If you want to be upset that this is “biggest” news from the team this offseason then sure. But the mascot is really no different from The Noodle or any other bullshit that doesn’t affect most fans. Especially those of you bitching that will never come into contact with Clark the Cub (98% of you).
I’m not happy about Clark the Cub. But I’m not going to rant about it because it doesn’t matter. It’s not like we are all making gifs or photoshops of Clark. It’s just rant after rant.
JonKneeVQuote Reply
I actually like Clark, because I have a 9-month daughter and I need as many tricks as I can get if she’s going to be a Cubs fan.
MylesQuote Reply
@ JonKneeV:
You bring up good points.
At the time, I thought that getting upset by the noodle, or the Toyota sign, or the Budweiser Bleachers was misguided and/or stupid while also pointless. But I didn’t react the same way this time. I think it’s because of the sustained shittiness over five years. During those earlier episodes, there was at least some baseball to pay attention to.
Suburban kidQuote Reply
@ JonKneeV:
I agree with JonKneeV agreeing with GBTS. But that bear sucks and I pray to FSM that I can live the rest of my life without seeing it again
fang2415Quote Reply
SVB wrote:
Someone ‘shop a bong in his hand to bring back Mish.
GBTSQuote Reply
I actually still don’t understand the reaction to the noodle. That never made any sense.
Suburban kidQuote Reply
@ fang2415:
Which to be fair is pretty much how it’s gone with the noodle. Not so much the Toyota sign though…
fang2415Quote Reply
@ Suburban kid:
The noodle is/was especially innocuous because it was outside the park. Who cares? It’s like complaining about the McDonald’s across the street.
My hope is that this new PedoCub thing will get like one hour of Wrigley time this season, probably just for a charity first pitch, and that after a few years of that and amid the excitement of the team actually winning, they realize the whole thing was stupid and silently throw away the costume. And based on the reaction yesterday, it wouldn’t surprise me if that’s how it went. Hopefully in 10 years it’ll be one of those “who-here-remembers” things like the College of Coaches.
fang2415Quote Reply
(dying laughing) also going back and reading yesterday’s comments after only seeing this bear shit this morning, I realize that the entire universe of Cubdom basically went through the same emotional journey in the first hour after seeing the bear: an instant, gut-level, kill-it-with-fire reaction, followed by a chilling fear that there was some connection with payroll just because of the Passan article the day before, followed by eye-rollingly hoping that its visibility will be limited to the under-two, in-hospital fanbase, followed by the realization that it’ll probably be dead in two years and its creators fired, followed by lulz at the entire universe of Cubdom going through the same emotional journey.
fang2415Quote Reply
DELETED
dmick89Quote Reply
@ uncle dave:
I think you’re looking a little too much into these comments, dave.
Don’t believe anyone is telling you this and don’t think anyone here is saying that either.
dmick89Quote Reply
I’m ok with a mascot. I would have rather they chose an actual Kodiak bear and let him loose on the field to maul any players or fans who aren’t fast enough to get out of harms way, but a cartoon bear is just as good I guess.
MuckerQuote Reply
It’s better than Wally.
sitrickQuote Reply
[img]http://s18.postimg.org/8noffk07b/forest2.gif[/img]
Like You CareQuote Reply
@ Mucker:
rofl
sitrickQuote Reply
@ Like You Care:
(dying laughing) there’s all kinds of wrong going on there. It’s awesome.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ Mucker:
faget point’d
fang2415Quote Reply
This fucking guy needs to die in a fire. Jesus Christ I hate being a fan of this Romper Room team.
http://www.nbcchicago.com/news/local/Billy-Cub-Disappointed-by-Cubs-Mascot-Snub-240020121.html?_osource=SocialFlowTwt_CHBrand
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ Mucker:
This reminds me of that thing from either here or ACB about how Quade should actually throw players under the team bus so they die. I spent like an entire day (dying laughing)’d-ing at that
fang2415Quote Reply
@ Mucker:
I’d be fine with an actual kodiac. That would be quite entertaining and provide reason to watch this year. PedoBear is probably a reason to not watch.
dmick89Quote Reply
I’m one of those people who over-reacted to the Bear.
I’m just tired of losing, and I’m tired of hearing about how great the Cubs’ front office is, and how great ownership is, and how it’s great that they’re finally building “the right way”, and how in a couple years they’ll be winning all the time/long term plan/pipeline of prospects, while watching one of the most boring teams in the league.
EdwinQuote Reply
@ dmick89:
It’s getting a little crowded in there. Might need a reboot.
Like You CareQuote Reply
@ Like You Care:
If you do, I suggest you start it with PedoBear and Jerry Sandusky. Maybe have a day care in the background.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
They could put the bear in a big pit near the warning track in CF. It’d be just like Houston’s park, except with a greater chance of death by bear attack.
EdwinQuote Reply
@ Edwin:
I feel the same as yesterday. It’s quite possibly the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen this team do and they deserve all the shit they get for it and then some.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
How come I only see the name of the file? Unless you meant that the letters “forest2.gif” were all kinds of wrong, which is, just, like, your opinion, man
fang2415Quote Reply
[img]http://s18.postimg.org/w1werhi4n/forest2.gif[/img]
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
I gotta admit, this is breathtakingly stupid. Shit like this makes the White Sox’s PR initiatives look good.
Is there any way that this new failure doesn’t make it onto the OV 2014 logo? How about PedoCub riding the puking unicorn?
fang2415Quote Reply
dmick89 wrote:
I’ve seen a guy get thrown out at second after a walk.
I’ve seen one of their best SPs sent to the bullpen after a bad month.
I’ve seen Darren Rovell sing the 7th inning stretch.
I’ve seen a wall made of solid fucking brick in the outfield.
But yeah, I guess a professional sports team adopting a mascot for children is pretty bad.
GBTSQuote Reply
For fucks sake I’ve seen Hayden Simpson.
GBTSQuote Reply
@ GBTS:
Yeah but this particular mascot is more like the marketing equivalent of Jim Hendry personally walking out to the mound in mid-2003 and punching Mark Prior in the face. And then kicking Ernie Banks when he got back to the dugout.
fang2415Quote Reply
@ fang2415:
try this: http://s18.postimg.org/8noffk07b/forest2.gif
dmick89Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
Yeah, I can now go to the link and remember that I only know like 1/4 of the jokes on there since the rest are from back when the Cubs were actually good
fang2415Quote Reply
@ fang2415:
If this happened when Jim Hendry was GM and the Tribune owned the team, there would be no one complaining about others complaining in this or the last thread. This would somehow be turned into yet another reason why Hendry is incompetent and needs to be fired or burned alive. And nobody would say a word.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ fang2415:
How come that image doesn’t show for you? It must be a browser thing.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ Aisle424:
Weird, that image doesn’t show up for me.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ Mucker:
Blast, I tried to mock up what this would look like but I don’t have anywhere to post the photo. Anyway, it was basically this with a Cubs logo:
[img]http://cheaperthandirt.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/HughGlassBearAttack.jpg[/img]
fang2415Quote Reply
What if Clark WAS Hayden Simpson?
GBTSQuote Reply
fang2415 wrote:
Quade is another example of how myself and others overreacted to things that had absolutely nothing to do with playing the game and no one complained to my knowledge. At the very least those complaints were overshadowed by a dozen or so people complaining. Over the 10 years I’ve been doing this, there are probably no less than 50 examples of this, but somehow getting bent out of shape over a mascot is the line that can’t be crossed? I said it earlier in the thread. I don’t understand.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ GBTS:
Then the Cubs 2010 draft would be perfect.
fang2415Quote Reply
I heard Clark the Bear originally had pants but then het met Cindy Sandberg.
[img]http://i.imgur.com/jpv0d.gif[/img]
GBTSQuote Reply
dmick89 wrote:
This is your answer. This has nothing to do with the FO or the players or anything that matters. Quade was actually the manager of the team, so yes, his comments and actions do have *something* to with the team.
Christ, mb, you will NEVER see pedobear unless you make a road trip to Wrigley and seek him out. This has nothing to do with adults.
http://ftw.usatoday.com/2014/01/cubs-adopt-adorable-new-bear-mascot-clark-the-cub/
RAH RAH REACHING A BROADER DEMOGRAPHIC AND BETTER MARKETING IS BAD RAH RAH
JonKneeVQuote Reply
@ dmick89:
MB do you really not see the distinction in complaining about the team’s manager (even over benign matters) and complaining about a large teddy bear?
GBTSQuote Reply
@ GBTS:
I’m still laughing at this. If that were true it would be funny enough to almost be worth the Cubs’ involvement with both Clark and Hayden Simpson.
fang2415Quote Reply
JonKneeV wrote:
And a sentence or single word does? And no, most of the shit Quade was made fun of for had absolutely nothing to do with the team.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ GBTS:
Meh, bad marketing is bad marketing. That statue doesn’t affect the way the Marlins play, but it still counts as one of the reasons that the franchise sucks.
fang2415Quote Reply
@ GBTS:
Apparently I do, because what some of you seem to be saying is that even the stupid shit that has nothing to do with the quality of play has somehow a direct impact on that quality of play. And maybe you can also explain how it was OK to get bent out of shape and spend hours creating photos due to a slogan. One that was a single sentence. Or the next one that was a single word. Or any of the other times it’s happened, most of which have had nothing to do with playing baseball. The noodle. Ronnie Woo Woo. Alvin Yellon. Todd Ricketts. Jim Hendry’s weight, a low for even a blog this low. Need I go on?
dmick89Quote Reply
I think part of the reason people here and elsewhere shat unusually large brix about this is because it just so happened to be announced the day after everybody was pissed off in one direction or another about the Passan article. Which is probably like 1% of Cubfandom, but still, aces timing by the Cubs media people.
I’m probably actually way more optimistic about the Cubs baseball-wise than most people, but srsly, their comms and marketing is just lulz.
fang2415Quote Reply
Quade was made fun of being albino for crying out loud. Even personal insults were acceptable. Does anyone think that had anything to do with actual baseball or Quade’s skills? Does anyone actually think they can accurately inform a single person of Quade’s ability as a manager based on a season and a half?
We’re talking about a site that has actually made fun of Al’s child and the only person to say a single word about that was SK. And that’s just because he’s old. (dying laughing)
dmick89Quote Reply
Holy shit I just realized that the last time the Cubs had a terrible mascot they won the World Series
http://chuckmanchicagonostalgia.files.wordpress.com/2010/12/photo-chicago-chicago-cubs-and-their-mascot-stands-behind-sepia-1908.jpg
Forget everything I said, Crane Kenney is a genius
fang2415Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
That reminds me, why does OV no longer inform its readers that it is a Discredited Blog? This is the worst thing to every happen
fang2415Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
No one was *mad* about Hendry’s weight. No one thought the Cubs were diabolically trying to hide a crappy team with “Committed.” There was no vitriol over the noodle. We made Photoshops and said (dying laughing) and we waited patiently for the next superficial blunder we could Photoshop or would kill us laughing. This bear for whatever reason has driven people to pitchforks. I understand the team sucks, but my god, the team sucked two days ago, and the only difference is now they suck and have a cartoon bear.
GBTSQuote Reply
I’m guessing Crane Kenney definitely consulted with a priest on the new mascot.
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
GBTS wrote:
I’m sorry, but no one who isn’t mad brings up Hendry’s weight. There were plenty of reasons to attack Hendry. A personal insult is delivered when someone is mad and plenty of them have been said here. Do I need to remind you how relentlessly we attacked Paul Sullivan? There was plenty of anger from myself and others that led to dj’s rant about HJE.
dmick89Quote Reply
Lord knows I’m not saying this blog is known for having Serious People, or even Good People (dying laughing). I’m just saying this kind of *anger* is rare for something that is so clearly harmless.
GBTSQuote Reply
I agree with everyone. I think the mascot is stupid and it’s pretty lame but at the end of the day it doesn’t bother me enough to rant about it. I guess in the back of my mind I always assumed this would happen eventually. And I think the Cubs do need to get more kids interested in the Cubs because all their parents are telling them the Cubs fucking suck. (dying laughing)
MuckerQuote Reply
@ Mercurial Outfielder:
And another example. Both Crane Kenney and the priest. I take back my earlier comment about “no less than 50.” It’s no less than 100 and probably closer to 500 over these last 10 years.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ GBTS:
I think there’s two reasons why the reactions to this are angrier than the usual facepalm:
1. This thing reeks of the sort of cynical corporate smarm that the Cubs, to their unusual credit, didn’t used to tend to shove down people’s throats
2. People are getting tired of the team sucking and are therefore getting angrier about any dumb thing they do
Mind you, I don’t think anybody would notice 1. if 2. weren’t also true
fang2415Quote Reply
I don’t think it’s harmful; I think it’s indicative of certain mindset among the ownership that is all too familiar. This is some Loveable Losers bullshit. I don’t think the mascot will hurt the team; I think an ownership group composed of profit-driven baby-boomer fanboys will, and this mascot smacks of baby-boomer fanboy bullshit. I remember the 1990’s and early 2000’s Cubs. I’m not going through that shit again.
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
dmick89 wrote:
I see my highbrow pedophilia humor didn’t come across.
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
@ GBTS:
Yeah and all I’ve been saying is that we haven’t saved up our rage around here for the most meaningful shit. The resentment to the anger yesterday and today is easily the most shocking thing I’ve seen here given the stupid shit people have gotten angry about in the past.
dmick89Quote Reply
fang2415 wrote:
Exactly.
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
dmick89 wrote:
Still one of my favorite things from ACB. I think that went up like a week after we moved to Bloguin too (dying laughing). I think Alvin threatened to sue us sometime around then too.
BerseliusQuote Reply
Personally I think we’re all just bored, angry people.
sitrickQuote Reply
@ dmick89:
Hang on, are you saying you’re angry at people getting angry about you getting angry? Or are you saying that you’re angry about people getting angry that you’re angry about them getting angry?
fang2415Quote Reply
Honestly, I think I was more offended by the shitty artwork than the actual mascot dude himself. It’s hard to be mad at the pictures of him visiting a children’s hospital, FFS. But that initial pic that was presented on twitter looked godawful, that bear looked like he was about to walk off-frame and put a gun in his mouth. Maybe if they rolled this out a little more softly (and with less focus-group prattle) there would have been less uproar.
BerseliusQuote Reply
Mercurial Outfielder wrote:
That’s what it reminds me of too. Embrace the Loveable Losers by hugging an actual Loser who looks like a pedophile.
dmick89Quote Reply
Berselius wrote:
Do you have the link? I know this story but only barely.
MylesQuote Reply
@ Myles:
http://www.dmick89.com/cubs/acb-top-8-starfuckers-inc/
This was also one of my favorites
http://www.dmick89.com/cubs/acb-top-8-a-rod-is-rude/
BerseliusQuote Reply
@ Berselius:
I’m with you B. Let’s be honest here, kids don’t take baseball as seriously as adults do so if this gets more kids involved in the Cubs then I’m all for it. And as an adult, if anybody takes sports so serious that a mascot makes you question your fan allegiance, then maybe it’s time for a little self reflection. Initial disgust to the news is one thing and when you think about who the attended audience is for this mascot, it’s not the end of the world.
MuckerQuote Reply
@ Berselius:
Based on the fan reaction, this is how I am now imagining the focus group:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsMEeujDv5Q
fang2415Quote Reply
@ Myles:
I reposted it here: http://www.dmick89.com/cubs/acb-top-8-starfuckers-inc/
dmick89Quote Reply
I’d forgotten this one (also by dj who could rant as well as anyone): http://www.dmick89.com/cubs/go-fuck-yourself-al-yellon/
dmick89Quote Reply
I don’t even give a shit that the fucking bear exists. It’s the timing.
We want anything good. ANYTHING. ANY FUCKING THING. Whether it’s Tanaka signing or some indications that maybe, just maybe, we’ll get to see Baez or Bryant at the major league level. Or a trade of one of their billion third basemen in the minors for some quality pitching. Even a Samardzija extension. ANY FUCKING THING.
We got a cartoon bear. We got a fucking cartoon bear.
Am I over the top? Absolutely. But we want some sign of progress and we were given a fucking cartoon bear.
And we’re expected to pay money to see a team where this is what they accomplished over the off-season.
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ Mucker:
Problem is, I just can’t see this appealing to any kids older than preschool (since that would be the age when they start to get made fun of for liking shit like this). Kids are rarely dumb enough to like the stuff that adults create just for kids to like, as the Simpson’s preemptive parody of the Cubs’s new mascot 17 years ago should have made perfectly clear
fang2415Quote Reply
Aisle424 wrote:
That’s the best part if the offseason holds as it has. Their best acquisition was a cartoon bear. It’s fucking awesome.
dmick89Quote Reply
Aisle424 wrote:
Spot-on.
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
DPLEETED
Mercurial OutfielderQuote Reply
@ fang2415:
I don’t know about that. I have nieces and a nephew that are under 10 and they probably would love to see that stupid mascot. I can remember when I was younger and going to Cubs games that I didn’t even care about the game, I just wanted to be able to sing “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” with Harry. Some kids will probably think he’s stupid but I bet you most kids would want to give him a high five or something if they saw him.
MuckerQuote Reply
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ Mucker:
Yeah, but singing with Harry was something that adults liked too. My point is that kids usually either like stuff that adults can also appreciate (e.g., Bugs Bunny), or stuff that adults don’t like but also don’t think that kids should like (e.g., Justin Bieber).
Pandering to kids with stuff that adults hate is one of the classic PR blunders, along with getting into a land war in Asia or going in against a Sicilian when death is on the line. The reason Poochie was a funny joke in 1997 is because marketers’ attempts to “get down with the kids” are so reliably cringeworthy for all ages.
fang2415Quote Reply
@ Mucker:
Maybe something like this could improve Clark’s image:
http://i.imgur.com/U5VfK.png
fang2415Quote Reply
I don’t know whether or not kids want to see Clark the bear or not. Some probably do. Some probably don’t. However, unless Mom and Dad are going to be handing wads of money to their young children and cutting them loose in Chicago for a day or three, I don’t see much financial gain for the Cubs. It’s great if it helps out a childrens hospital or two, but I don’t see the Cubs getting any money from this.
I figure they already succeeded. They got us talking more about the Cubs here at OV than we have for a good year.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ fang2415:
Sorry to hear you had a rough childhood, fang
BerseliusQuote Reply
by the way, I didn’t even know until yesterday that you could just create mascots out of the blue. I hope it dies like the failed attempt at Michigan in the 20s and 30s. I can’t imagine Wolverines fans if the university added a mascot. They might even riot.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
Maybe if Clark doesn’t work out the Cubs can just make Yellon the mascot. It would cause more or less the same reaction
fang2415Quote Reply
Oh yeah, when Michigan did have a mascot, it was a live wolverine. I still think the Cubs would have been better off with a live bear as the mascot.
dmick89Quote Reply
I just wish he had some damn pants on.
MylesQuote Reply
@ Berselius:
felt good man
(dying laughing)
fang2415Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
Problem in 1916 was the cage
http://www.chicagotribune.com/business/chi-wildpitch-good_questionsep30,0,235081.story
Mucker’s idea is so much better
fang2415Quote Reply
this was my buddy’s reaction to clark, which i think is spot on:
EnricoPallazzoQuote Reply
dmick89 wrote:
I have feelings, you know.
George KottarasQuote Reply
@ George Kottaras:
tell me about it.
Justin RuggianoQuote Reply
I can’t believe I’m going to be upstaged at Cubs Con by a bear costume.
Jose VerasQuote Reply
@ Jose Veras:
dude…you’re going to be upstaged by the drinking fountain.
Justin RuggianoQuote Reply
There’s no way I’m reading every word, so I’m not sure if this was addressed: Is it possible that people are mad because it’s clear that people in the Cubs organization were working on something OTHER THAN improving the baseball team? I mean, isn’t that what it all boils down to? Several hundred or even thousand man hours were spent on that bear that could have been spent on making the team better. That would piss me off if I were a fan.
Like You CareQuote Reply
@ Justin Ruggiano:
Whatever short side.
Jose VerasQuote Reply
…guys?
Wesley WrightQuote Reply
@ Like You Care:
It’s not like Theo Epstein and the scouting department oversaw this project, fwiw. I wouldn’t be surprised if the FO found out about it 24 hours before we did.
BerseliusQuote Reply
dmick89 wrote:
I dunno. I’m not trying to show any disrespect to anyone around here, but the tone over the last couple of months has swung to be dramatically more negative, and in an emotional and personal sort of way. It’s not about believing that the front office is doing its job poorly, it’s about the Rickettses lining their pockets. It’s not about the team having trouble rebuilding, it’s about the club actively cheating fans out of their money. And now it’s this.
Mostly, it just bums me out that the tone has turned from one where folks were intellectually engaged to one that’s so emotional. I really enjoy the commentary here for the most part, people are generally smart and genial and have a lot of interesting shit to say. But that’s been eroded to an extent by this winter’s turn of events. I can’t tell anyone what to say or think, but I can sure be bummed out that it’s happening.
It reminds me a bit too much of what has happened to Illinois basketball fans over the past few years. They were already a pretty flawed bunch of individuals, but at the end of Bruce Weber’s tenure, the tone got silly negative, and most of the complaints simply weren’t grounded in fact (or at least relevant fact). He didn’t dress well, his voice was annoying, he didn’t properly value point guards or physical big men, the motion offense sucks, he didn’t use his bench enough, blah, blah, blah. What people were really pissed about was the fact that the team was losing, but the conversation was all about nasty, personal things that were frequently not supported by facts (if not counterfactual).
It’s 100% fair to be critical of the Cubs and how slowly the rebuilding process has progressed. But given where the team is now and how severe and perverse the incentives to not finishing in the middle of the pack are under the current CBA, not spending in the free agent market to get to a high-70s win total can easily be defended. Making the leap to thinking that this is some sort of intentional, Loria-esque effort to suck money out of the team is not one that can be cleanly or obviously made.
I’m not looking forward to the reaction if/when the team doesn’t sign Tanaka. I’ll put it this way: I’ll happily take the field against any single team at this point. I’d make that bet as many times as I could. But I fully expect that the general reaction around here and especially around other Cubs blogs or on Twitter will be that it’s a sign that the club won’t spend under any circumstances as long as the Rickettses are in the owners box.
I’m not defending the ownership group, and definitely not saying that they are clearly competent and deserving of our full faith at this point. I’m as hostile to owners as anyone around here, and I wouldn’t walk across the street to piss on any single member of that family if they were on fire. But I do have pretty severe disagreements with some of the leaps of logic that are being made these days.
I know that it’s not my blog and that I can’t tell people what to say or think, and if I don’t like it I should just leave. I just really don’t want it to come to that because I have way too much respect for the proprietors and the folks who post here. I hope I’ve not overstepped any boundaries, just saying what’s on my mind.
uncle daveQuote Reply
uncle dave wrote:
I’m expecting the Cubs to make a strong offer that gets blown out of the water by someone giving him absolutely silly money.
BerseliusQuote Reply
Berselius wrote:
Yeah, I don’t care that people who never would be anywhere near baseball operations worked on this. If I had any thought that Jed or Theo had any involvement, then sure, I’d be pissed about that. But I think Theo probably would have quit before having to spend even five minutes seriously working on this.
Aisle424Quote Reply
Berselius wrote:
I’m hoping it’s the Cubs that give him the silly money. But they won’t.
I’ll even be happy if they offer a ridiculous sum and STILL get beat out by a more ridiculous sum (Yankees).
The Yankees absolutely have to have Tanaka. They’re hellbent on contending and their pitching needs help. They now have at least one year of ARod off the books and no Cano. They HAVE to have him.
So let’s say the “reasonable” price is 5 years, $80M (I don’t feel like looking it up, so let’s just say that’s what it is). Then if the Cubs offer 6 and $120M, but get beat by the Yankees 7 and $140M, then I’m fine with it. They tried. They went above and beyond and still lost, so good luck to the Yankees with that contract.
But if they lose because the Yankees offer 5 years and $85M, then I’m going to be pissed.
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ Berselius:
You’re looking at this rationally, though. Is there any rational reason to be upset about the mascot?
To me, this is like getting mad at your kid when he proudly shows you a cool painting he made in art class on the same day you got a call from the principal about him cheating on a test.
Like You CareQuote Reply
@ uncle dave:
Couldn’t have said it any better.
JonKneeVQuote Reply
I can’t speak for anyone else, but the reason it pisses me off is that this is like if you were starving, and you’ve been starving for a long time, and a nice man comes along and promises you will have food soon, but it will take some time, and then at long last he shows back up and says he has good news and hands you a rubber ball to play with.
Aisle424Quote Reply
Iono… If I were upset about the mascot it would be because the only thing I’d want to hear from the team is how they’re fixing the real problem.
Like You CareQuote Reply
I absolutely have an emotional response to this. And it isn’t all logical. I’m fine with that.
I’ll get over this and this will soon be swirled into all of the innumerable stupid shit we have to deal with as Cubs fans. But that is my initial reaction, and I don’t care how negative it is.
Aisle424Quote Reply
Since this is the first time I’ve seen dj back, I’ll start the mocks with SF:
30 DE KONY EALY MISSOURI
56 WR KELVIN BENJAMIN FLORIDA STATE
61 CB E.J. GAINES MISSOURI
77 S DEONE BUCANNON WASHINGTON STATE
94 OT MORGAN MOSES VIRGINIA
125 QB JIMMY GAROPPOLO EASTERN ILLINOIS
158 RB DEVONTA FREEMAN FLORIDA STATE
Like You CareQuote Reply
Aisle424 wrote:
Fixed
BerseliusQuote Reply
GB’s:
21 ILB C.J. MOSLEY ALABAMA
53 S CALVIN PRYOR LOUISVILLE
85 G GABE JACKSON MISSISSIPPI STATE
117 QB BRETT SMITH WYOMING
149 TE MARCEL JENSEN FRESNO STATE
That’s a winner.
Like You CareQuote Reply
@ uncle dave:
I don’t know, dave. I think it tends to be more about what people believe and not what is actually going on. It’s become political in a way. We’re all to blame, but one group says one thing and it’s mischaracterized. The other group says another and it too is mischaracterized. Both groups take actions by the team and blow it out of proportion. The Cubs farm system is super duper awesome and gonna produce a million stars. The Cubs ownership sucks balls and is shoving hundred dollar bills up their ass while laughing at the fans. Something meant to be funny is looked at as more of a larger picture. And so on. It’s led to endless arguments, none of which I’m too terribly interested in so maybe I say the wrong things. I don’t know.
I tried to say something about this roughly 6 months ago, but ended up stopping short. It’s been going on a lot longer than the 2-3 months you’re talking about or maybe I just kept my mouth shut before that. I started writing an article about a year ago about this trend.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ Aisle424:
Agreed.
dmick89Quote Reply
If opening my fat mouth got others to start complaining then I see it as a positive development. It was kind of troubling to me that Cubs fans were in unison for so long. There should never be so much agreement about what is going on (in baseball or the world). The reality is that the Cubs themselves are to blame for people complaining and maybe, just maybe, I’m partially responsible for people opening their mouths here. Either way, it’s a good thing. For all of the unjust praise so far, maybe some unjust criticism is warranted.
dmick89Quote Reply
CHI’s:
14 DE KONY EALY MISSOURI
51 CB KYLE FULLER VIRGINIA TECH
82 S DEONE BUCANNON WASHINGTON STATE
113 QB BRETT SMITH WYOMING
144 S TRE BOSTON NORTH CAROLINA
Like You CareQuote Reply
We need to do a community mock draft. We should be able to get at least 5-6 people to take 5-6 teams each.
Like You CareQuote Reply
@ Aisle424:
I’ll only be pissed if the Cubs don’t offer something that’s reasonable. For example, let’s say they offer 8/100 and there are 3 or 4 teams right around them. Maybe one or two higher and one or two lower. Then some other team offers 10/220, well, there’s not a lot you can do about that. But if we learn they bid only $60 million or something, then there’s reason to be pissed because they weren’t even in the ballpark of the next closest teams. That’s not even trying. It’s putting in a bid to say you put in a bid. You can’t honestly say that you wanted the player if it turns out like that.
My guess is that they put in a bid for something like 8/100 and there are several teams that go higher than they do. It won’t be as clear as the previous example, but I want them in the ballpark of where the next highest teams bid. If they aren’t, they didn’t try. Or they suck at homework.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ Berselius:
I’d rather have a TGI Friday’s gift card than a fucking mascot. At least there is some value to the gift card. Not much since it’s TGI Friday’s, but maybe I could sell it for 75 cents on the dollar to Tango or someone who visits his site.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ Aisle424:
Agreed, they definitely have to make a credible offer here. I honestly think that due to the lack of options and the fact that he’s only 25 that he’ll get 7/140 (including the posting fee). At the front end, that puts him at about the fifth or sixth highest-paid pitcher in the game, but by the end of the deal he’ll still be in his prime and making maybe top-20 cash. And Hub Arkush will be pissed that some Japanese guy is getting all that money.
I’d do 7/140 in a heartbeat if I were the Cubs in this situation. I also think that even if they make that offer, he’ll choose a similar one in a different location due to personal reasons and the time horizon for contention.
uncle daveQuote Reply
uncle dave wrote:
Yeah I do too. Nothing you can do about that.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
Yeah, I agree with this (unless that’s bad, of course).
Kidding aside, this all goes away when the team starts to win. Stylistic differences aside, that’s probably not going to happen in any sort of meaningful way whether they spend this year or not. I’ll do my best to stay off the cross between now and then.
uncle daveQuote Reply
I like iPad and iPhone accessories as much as the next guy, but seriously?
[img]http://cdn.cultofmac.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/in-pocket-250×150.jpg[/img]
dmick89Quote Reply
dmick89Quote Reply
Also, lost in the shuffle:
Mercurial Outfielder wrote:
Post of the day.
uncle daveQuote Reply
uncle dave wrote:
My favorite part about that whole thing was the postscript a few months later, when the priest went public to say Crane was a jackwad.
Suburban kidQuote Reply
Oh yeah, another jailbreak tweak worth jailbreaking for is Activator. It’s like Magic Trackpad meets iPhone. Awesome.
dmick89Quote Reply
dmick89 wrote:
[img]http://i1022.photobucket.com/albums/af346/mistah_pants/soul-glo_zps24cd0ab4.jpg[/img]
uncle daveQuote Reply
http://rulingsports.com/2014/01/14/does-a-federal-lawsuit-pave-the-best-path-for-alex-rodriguez-to-get-back-onto-the-baseball-diamond/
dmick89Quote Reply
http://www.theheckler.com/2014/01/14/cubs-fans-already-clamoring-for-less-talented-but-hard-nosed-mascot-understudy-vinny-to-replace-clark/
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
BerseliusQuote Reply
@ Berselius:
Just like the one our master bath.
dmick89Quote Reply
Today in Oliver projections:
Javier Baez: .238/.290/.493 (.336 wOBA) and 4.2 WAR
MylesQuote Reply
Ruggiano has a helluva website
SVBQuote Reply
@ Myles:
Saw that about a week ago his player page. Not sure I buy it based in some of the other numbers. Strikeouts for example. About 35% IIRC.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ SVB:
url or gtfo
Suburban kidQuote Reply
@ Justin Ruggiano:
@ Suburban kid:
(dying laughing). Click his name in blue at comment noted above. Someone’s up to tricks again.
SVBQuote Reply
SVB’s 7-y.o. daughter on Clark. (Using the full size picture on ESPN, not any of the one’s you cretins have posted here, (dying laughing))
Do you like it?
Wife:
SVBQuote Reply
Myles and WaLi, you should hold up a picture of Clark to the babies and see if they smile, laugh, cry, or hide.
SVBQuote Reply
GBTS wrote:
Kind of surprised the NSFW pix didn’t do that already. Guess there wasn’t enough tit.
SVBQuote Reply
@ SVB:
I missed his comment up there. I’m disappointed.
Suburban kidQuote Reply
@ Myles:
Also, Justin Ruggiano is projected to have the highest WAR on the team. I’m thinking something has gone wrong with them projections.
dmick89Quote Reply
I don’t know. That says 2013 projections as the header on the page, but the link said 2014 projections.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ dmick89:
I think they are 2014 and they just haven’t changed the browser title.
dmick89Quote Reply
I started up Hulu and saw they added the Swedish show (Bron) that FX’s The Bridge was based on. First ad before the thing even plays says something like this:
Players change. Coaches change. Mascots never change.
What the fuck is it with mascots? The fuck did I do them?
dmick89Quote Reply
SVB wrote:
Aisle424Quote Reply
Nate’s Tanaka back-up plan for Cubs:
Sign Ubaldo Jimenez to a contract of 1yr/25M with an option to add 3 additional years @ 15M each. If he’s awesome and Rizzo, Castro, F7 improve, they’re decent at deadline, bring up Baez and Bryant, maybe add a piece, contend, then have Ubaldo for the next 3 years at reasonable price. If they suck, trade him at the deadline, pay the salary he’s owed this year and get good prospects who are ready to contribute next year. His contract would be a good value for next 3 years to acquiring team. That would more than replace the lost 2nd rd pick.
Just trying to get creative. Cubs have some $$ to spend, and can use it to help now and future.
Recalcitrant Blogger NateQuote Reply
dmick89 wrote:
That show has been on Dailymotion for a long time: http://www.dailymotion.com/us/relevance/search/bron+broen/1
I’m sure Hulu has better quality, though.
Rizzo the RatQuote Reply
Way to polish that turd, Cubs.
Aisle424Quote Reply
@ Rizzo the Rat:
I remember you mentioning that, but if I’m going to watch it had to be on the tv.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ Recalcitrant Blogger Nate:
Not a bad idea at all.
dmick89Quote Reply
@ Aisle424:
Lmao are you kidding me?
WaLiQuote Reply
@ WaLi:
ESPN has a poll up about the mascot. At about 5:00 today there were something like 15,000 votes and it was 50% in favor or Clark, 35% “don’t like”, and 15% like the idea, but don’t like Clark. Now there are 60,000 votes and like is at 41%, don’t like at 40% and 19% like the idea but not Clark. Either way, a majority like the idea of the Cubs having a mascot.
I guess that is a trending topic.
SVBQuote Reply
@ SVB:
1500 more votes since the previous comment. Wow.
SVBQuote Reply
Anyone see this live?
http://deadspin.com/comcast-sportsnet-airs-our-version-of-cubs-mascot-with-1501633812?utm_campaign=socialflow_deadspin_facebook&utm_source=deadspin_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow
Rice CubeQuote Reply
http://deadspin.com/comcast-sportsnet-airs-our-version-of-cubs-mascot-with-1501633812
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
(dying laughing)
Aisle424Quote Reply
i havent posted in awhile but the uncle dave thing got me pondering my current state of fandom
i look at it like this, i dont give a fuck if the Cubs suck. Its been 2 years and we knew what we signed up for with the rebuild where i have totally 100 % lost patience, faith whatever you want to call it in the Ricketts family is with the Wrigley rebuild.
You couldn’t have monkey fucked that entire thing any better if you had tried and still they got 99.99 % of what they asked for. The city stepped up, Tunney sat down ect. It would have been a sign of good faith a honest to god tangible sign that things are getting better for them to GET TO FUCKING WORK. Instead months after an agreement its nothing just vague reasons why they cant get started. You’re Tom Ricketts you have Ameritrade money, cunt punt Beth Murphy, tell her lawyer to go pound sand and hire a construction crew. I guaren -fucking-tee you can pay huge lawyer bills a lot longer than she can. Go do something, anything to show you aren’t just talk because so far Wrigley 2.0 is just like Mesa 2.0 a bunch of talk about building a big complex area to drive revenue, threatening cities to get their way getting their way and then the bare fucking minimum.
Talk is cheap. And if they are going to be this limp dicked about fixing their own fucking stadium to drive revenue then how can we trust that IF these prospects pan out Ricketts is going to do his job?
dylanjQuote Reply
also my favorite part of those old rants is the spelling. just remembering being so pissed at work that i would pound that out not, not bother to spell check and just post it. Ahh, the days before kids when you could care about things.
dylanjQuote Reply
@ dylanj:
That’s a good point about how the Ricketts are screwing up modernization, which feeds back into revenues that can pay players.
Seems to me they’ve got a pretty great player development/on-field management team in Thoyer et al.
OTOH, they still have Crane Kenney. Seriously, what does he have on these guys? Is he Rahm’s secret booty call? Goat blessings, goofy mascots, construction schedules, rooftop contracts. Doesn’t all that go through Kenney? I was surprised he kept his job 2 years ago, it’s even more surprising now.
Basically, I agree with Uncle Dave, but the phrase “Crane Kenney” pretty easily puts me in the “what the hell is Ricketts doing?” camp.
SVBQuote Reply
Assume you are a fan of the Detroit Lions and the Chicago Cubs. Which is the better choice? Jim Caldwell or Clark?
SVBQuote Reply
@ SVB:
Since the Chicago Cubs and the Detroit Lions represent the epitome of futility and long time general ineptitude in sports I do not think it is possible to be a fan of both teams. Being a fan of just one of them is hard enough and requires huge amounts of tolerance for pain.
I would think that any person who has actually tried to be fans of both teams has probably died in some sort of freak S&M accident.
JimLQuote Reply
@ Aisle424:
Good name for a band
Suburban kidQuote Reply
Can a new post be made that doesn’t include “fucking” in link? Can’t access from work (dying laughing)
WaLiQuote Reply
@ SVB:
Clark. I’m feeling pretty good about that Lions hire right now, as a not-Lions fan (dying laughing).
BerseliusQuote Reply
For such a cartoonish bear (albeit with a manly shlong) supposed to appeal to young kids, Clark isn’t a very cuddly name.
Makes me think of Clark Griswold.
Griswold…..grizzly….baby grizzly. Maybe?
Nah.
Still don’t like it.
Suburban kidQuote Reply
new shit: http://obstructedview.net/projections/javier-baez-and-projections.html
dmick89Quote Reply