Cubs 9, Pirates 2

In Postgame by berselius268 Comments

OSS: Cole Hamels strikes out nine in his Cubs debut.

Three up:

  1. It wasn’t the most efficient start, but Cole Hamels struck out nine Pirates in five innings in his first appearance in a Cubs uniform. He also picked up his first hit as a Cub as the team jumped all over the Pirates pitchers early. Hamels allowed one unearned run on three hits and two walks.
  2. Willson Contreras went 3-4 with a two run bomb to LF and a RBI walk.
  3. Kintzler managed an uneventful 1.1 innings in his Cubs debut. When I looked him up I was shocked to see that he spent parts of six seasons with the Brewers, and yet I have zero memory of him on that team (dying laughing).

Three down:

  1. The Dodgers have only scored two runs off of Chase Anderson as I write this.
  2. CJ was used in a game with a giant lead, but I guess Joe just wanted him to get some work in with the off day earlier this week.
  3. Relief deuce Tyler Chatwood still managed to issue a walk in while pitching the ninth inning of this one.

Next up: The Cubs open a four game series against the Padres. Hopefully the Cubs can take care of business. Monty takes on Robbie Erlin at 7:05 PM CT tomorrow. Erlin is a swingman who has been good in relief but terrible in the rotation.

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  1. Ryno

    Notable minor league performances:

    Paul Richan – 3IP, 2H, 0ER, 4K, 2BB
    Brennan Davis – 2/4, BB
    Cole Roederer remembered he’s supposed to not get out – 2/5, HR, 3B

    Oh yeah, and Alec Mills pitched 6 perfect innings for Iowa. If you like that sort of thing.

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  2. Ryno

    Multiple rumors hitting us that Iowa State coach Matt Campbell would be frontrunner for Ohio State job if it became open.

    — Andrew Perloff (@andrewperloff) August 2, 2018

    He’s done an amazing job in Ames.

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  3. Ryno

    Great way to get terrible service from me, but at least you’d get some extra bodily fluids in your food.

    I won’t tell you where I wait tables.

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  4. Ryno

    dmick89,

    You can always tell someone who hasn’t waited tables.

    Everyone should do it. I did it for about two weeks and that was enough for me to respect the people who do it.

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  5. dmick89

    Ryno,

    I’ve never waited tables, but I worked in restaurants for several years. I think anyone who works in a restaurant for much time has a ton of respect for what servers do. I also think most people in general do, but some people just like being assholes. That person above wants to be the center of the earth.

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  6. Perkins

    It would be worth far more than $5 to me to make sure someone like consumed the bodily fluids of the entire kitchen in every single course. Beyond his being a huge gaping asshole, what a fucking cheapskate.

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  7. Ryno

    dmick89,

    Some people just don’t appreciate it until they’ve had to do it. Maybe we should require humans to be waiters for two weeks to earn a license to eat at restaurants.

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  8. EnricoPallazzo

    Ryno: Everyone should do it. I did it for about two weeks and that was enough for me to respect the people who do it.

    this might sound stupid but i honestly think that, in the absence of a mandatory military draft, everyone who doesn’t go into the military should be required to wait tables/bartend/do some other service industry job for at least one year after high school. it has nothing to do with learning how to have respect for what waiters do, it has to do with learning how to respect your fellow human beings and how not to act like a piece of garbage. this country would be a much better place.

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  9. dmick89

    EnricoPallazzo,

    I get what you’re saying, but there are a lot of adults who count on those jobs and if you required it out of high school, all those jobs would now go to those who who would earn less money. It would be a huge boost to the owners and screw over a lot of people who actually want to do the work. I think tips should be mandatory and that restaurants should add it in before presenting the bill. I’m not sure how many servers would really like that though. Many make more with the current system.

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  10. dmick89

    Perkins: Beyond his being a huge gaping asshole, what a fucking cheapskate.

    That was my thought. You’re going to take your wife out to dinner and you’re only willing to tip $5? I understand most people don’t make a lot of money, but that’s a shitty tip for most non-buffet restaurants.

    I tip roughly 20% every time. I pay no attention to how good the servers are. It’s a ridiculously difficult job. If I get poor service I assume there’s a logical reason for it. I’m not going to punish someone relying on tips because their job is difficult. Again, fuck that person. I hope he got torn to shreds on facebook for that shit.

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  11. Ryno

    EnricoPallazzo: it has to do with learning how to respect your fellow human beings and how not to act like a piece of garbage. this country would be a much better place.

    It’s a shame that some people can’t figure this out on their own.

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  12. Rice in limbo

    I don’t know the exact etiquette for tipping, but I usually take the entire bill (including tax), quick calculate 20%, and tack an extra dollar on top. Figure the wait staff get shat on most of the day so just trying to do my part to make sure they can at least have a bright spot.

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  13. Ryno

    If a waiter does a good job, I’ll tip 25%+. I go 20% as a standard. 15% for a “poor” job. If you did badly enough to earn less than 15% from me, I’ve probably already discussed the problem with you or just left (which has never happened).

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  14. Myles

    Yeah, take the top two digits, multiply by .2, round up, minimum of $5. $32 = $6.4 rounded up to $7. $1 a drink at a bar, $2 if it’s a crazy drink or something (use your judgment).

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  15. Perkins

    dmick89,

    I generally tip 20% or more on the post-tax total, and I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve gone below that. There’s really only one time I can remember exceptionally poor service in the past ten years. It’s a tough job and I get that tips are the lifeline for servers because their employers can get away with paying them well below the minimum wage.

    I spent a couple summers working at a Home Depot in the northern suburbs of Chicago, and more than a few customers were entitled dicks who treated us poorly by virtue of our working there. Much respect for anyone who has to deal with retail customers (food service or otherwise) on a regular basis.

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  16. andcounting

    Anybody who has to work with people on a regular basis deserves more money than they’re being paid.

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  17. Author
    berselius

    I worked a summer job at a gas station when I was an undergrad and enjoyed it way more than any shitty internship that I could have gone after at the time. My main issue with working there was that I was too good at the job, so they always put me on shifts with the slowest cashiers just so they could keep the line moving (dying laughing). One week they had me working the same shift with the other young guy and we had a blast, probably because they got tipped off that management was going to send a secret shopper that week. I think we got the best score in the state.

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  18. Perkins

    I think that game was about a 10 point shift in either direction for the Dodgers’ and Brewers’ Elo ratings.

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  19. Ryno

    Notable minor league performances:

    Zack Short – 1/3, HR, BB
    Erick Leal – 5IP, 4H, 3ER, 5K, 1BB, 7-3 GO-AO
    Ethan Roberts – 1 perfect inning, 1K
    Cole Roederer – 2/5
    Brennan Davis – 1/4, BB

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  20. Ryno

    Name a cover that's better than the original, and you're not allowed to mention Jeff Buckley or Sinead O'Connor.

    — Josh Greenman (@joshgreenman) August 2, 2018

    FIRST of all, I’ll mention Sinead just to say that Chris Cornell’s version is better than hers and Prince’s. And I never thought I’d say anyone’s anything musical was better than Prince’s.

    Second, Rufus Wainwright and John Cale had better versions of Hallelujah than Buckley.

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  21. Rizzo the Rat

    Perkins:
    I think that game was about a 10 point shift in either direction for the Dodgers’ and Brewers’ Elo ratings.

    It was a good game, but could have used a few more Dodger home runs, imho.

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  22. Perkins

    Ryno,

    Three come to mind immediately:
    “All Along the Watchtower” by Jimi Hendrix
    “The Man Who Sold the World” by Nirvana
    “Imagine” by A Perfect Circle

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  23. Ryno

    Perkins,

    I think Watchtower falls into the same category as Nothing Compares and Hallelujah. Songs that were so iconic that they made many people forget they were covers. Kinda like Cash’s Hurt and Joplin’s Bobby McGee.

    Even including that category, though, I think the correct answer is Joe Cocker’s With a Little Help From My Friends. The Beatles didn’t put all they had into that, but Cocker blew their shit away.

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  24. Perkins

    Rizzo the Rat:
    I can’t, um, imagine any version of that Lennon song being any good.

    The big difference for me is that the Perfect Circle version is much darker and subtly acknowledging that it’s impossible to achieve what he’s singing about. As someone with moderate misanthropic leanings, it really speaks to me. That and I have a strong preference for Maynard James Keenan over John Lennon.

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  25. Myles

    I actually really enjoy Mark Ronson’s entire discography (Record Collection is a little lackluster, but his other 3 albums are all A-tier to me), but that’s neither here nor there.

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  26. dmick89

    Morning Dew and I Know You Rider by The Grateful Dead. I could probably name another five Dead songs that I like much better than the original, but those two stand out.

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  27. EnricoPallazzo

    dmick89,

    yeah i wasn’t even gonna bother with the dead because they just have so many that are better than the original. if i had to pick, i’d go with “it’s all over now baby blue”. which i guess is probably a pretty weird choice. i had no idea that morning dew was a cover.

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  28. Rizzo the Rat

    Nice to see Caratini get a hit. He needs to produce a bit more, since he’s not considered a good defensive catcher.

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  29. andcounting

    I won’t pretend he’s the next coming of Kris Bryant, but I’ve been impressed with David Bote. He’s a fun story this season, and he doesn’t seem to get flustered by high leverage moments.

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  30. BVS

    Rizzo the Rat:
    That’s one of the worse-umpired games I’ve ever seen.

    Well, when the umpire crew has CB Bucknor and Angel Hernandez you have a good chance of seeing the worst umpired game ever…

    and some ejections because the managers are yelling the same things you are, but within earshot.

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  31. Rizzo the Rat

    Gameday sure likes labeling pitches “knuckle curve.” Is that a description that pitchers actually use? Has any catcher ever said, “three fingers means to throw your knuckle curve”?

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  32. Rizzo the Rat

    Joe broke Wade Davis just like he broke Aroldis Chapman. *looks up Chapman’s numbers* Oh, never mind.

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  33. BVS

    Pretty smart move not to re-sign Davis or sign Holland. Must have heard us complain about Davis’ peripherals.

    A part time Morrow has been better than both.

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  34. Wenningtons Gorilla Cock

    BVS:
    Pretty smart move not to re-sign Davis or sign Holland. Must have heard us complain about Davis’ peripherals.

    A part time Morrow has been better than both.

    Pretty sure “Part Time Morrow” is a cover song

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  35. Rizzo the Rat

    BVS:
    Pretty smart move not to re-sign Davis or sign Holland. Must have heard us complain about Davis’ peripherals.

    A part time Morrow has been better than both.

    Yeah, but I wasn’t a fan of letting Rondon go even at the time, and it looks worse now. And let’s not even talk about re-signing Duensing.

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  36. Perkins

    Rizzo the Rat,

    I would have preferred Rondon to Duensing, but I also didn’t think there was any guarantee he’d look like himself again. He’d been pretty bad since about August of 2016, so it was probably reasonable to cut bait rather than pay what he’d have made in arbitration.

    Looking through his stats, his pitch usage isn’t dramatically different, but his velocity is up about a tick and a half relative to 2016/17, and his contact allowed is down, so it seems like he just has better stuff, similar to how he was in 2014/15.

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  37. North Side Pat

    That was a first 3 innings I’ve recently enjoyed.

    And for cover songs, I’d nominate the 7 Seconds version of “99 Red Balloons” and another Lemonheads cover – “Luka”.

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  38. andcounting

    Rizzo the Rat,

    Athletic defensive versatility is the new market inefficiency. He’s been pretty impressive for a guy not playing his natural position. Bote, Happ, Zobrist, Schwarber, Bryant, Contreras, Baez are all guys who have been able to switch positions well. Bote really seems to have that ability to excel wherever you put him defensively, and I like that they have a surplus of that kind of talent. Very fun to watch.

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  39. BVS

    I like Lyle Lovett’s cover of Stand By Your Man. It takes in a totally different meaning when he sings it.

    Also like Weezer’s cover of Africa, wouldn’t say it was better, just strikingly similar.

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  40. Rizzo the Rat

    I guess I get giving Rizzo a day off. He must be tired from rounding the bases on all those homers.

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  41. Berselius is too lazy to login

    Tyson Ross ———> Cardinals

    Also

    Jordan Lyles ———> Brewers

    Looks like both were straight waiver claims.

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  42. Rizzo the Rat

    This is why I hate Joe Maddon’s fooling around with the lineup with a precarious lead in the division.

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  43. Rizzo the Rat

    Hey, it’s the same thing that happened in NLCS game 5, but the umpire got the call right this time.

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  44. Rizzo the Rat

    In a few years, people will look at Lester’s bref page and wonder how he made the All-Star team this year.

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  45. North Side Pat

    Brewers struck out for the last out of the 9th, yet reached on a wild pitch. 2 on, 2 out, down 2.

    EDIT: Rockies suck.

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  46. andcounting

    Rizzo the Rat,

    I’m pretty sure his most valuable skill is hitting the ball anywhere on the bat other than the barrel. There are a ton of bloop hits to be had in that approach.

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  47. andcounting

    Angel Hernandez agreed to call that last strike after Contreras promised no Cub would reach base in the 9th.

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  48. Perkins

    That was one of the worst-umpired series I can remember. Also the Cubs really should have been able to take three games.

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  49. Rizzo the Rat

    Also annoying: that walk by CJ that led to the go-ahead run should have been a strikeout, retiring the side.

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  50. Rizzo the Rat

    Anyway, I hope this is the last time in a long while we see…

    – Rizzo getting a day off
    – Russell hitting cleanup
    – Schwarber starting against a lefty
    – Rosario pitching with the game within one run
    – Anyone trying to steal third down two with two outs
    – Angel Hernandez behind the plate

    etc., etc., etc.

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  51. Rizzo the Rat

    Anyway, I think the Cubs are doing remarkably well for a team with their best starting pitcher, the best position player and their closer on the DL (and an extended stint for the first one and the second stint for each of the latter two).

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  52. andcounting

    Tonight’s Cub squadron:
    Rizzo 1B
    Zobrist 2B
    Heyward RF
    Baez 3B
    Schwarber DH
    Contreras C
    Happ LF
    Russell SS
    Almora CF

    Hamels – praising the designated deities of not having to hit.

    I love the AL Cubs.

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  53. Rizzo the Rat

    It was really selfish of Zobrist to hit that triple with nobody on, but hit a grounder to first with the bases loaded.

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  54. Rizzo the Rat

    I guess it was Strop’s turn to deliver the rain delay speech:

    Great stuff between Baez and Strop tonight. During the rain delay, Strop got Baez's head straight. After he struck out badly 2 times, Strop told him 'you're going 2 for 4.' And when Baez started to respond, Strop cut him off: "You're going 2 for 4." He then homered and doubled

    — Jesse Rogers (@ESPNChiCubs) August 7, 2018

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