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  • Rant Sports writes stupid stuff on the internet again

    The Chicago Cubs must trade Alfonso Soriano before other teams realize just how far he has fallen since he became a Cub. – stupid stuff found on internet

    I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest that if random stupid guy on internet knows that Soriano isn't as good as he once was that other MLB teams know it too. After all, stupid guy on the internet is, you know, stupid.

    Soriano’s first year with the Cubs was 2007.  The year before that, he hit 46 home runs and had 95 RBIs. He also played in 159 games in 2006.  In 2007, he hit 33 home runs and 70 RBIs. He has averaged playing in only 132 games a year.

    Why in bloody christ would you let the secret out? You just told all the other teams what they couldn't possibly have figured out on their own.

    He has enough pop left in his swing that an American League team might want to get him and use him as a designated hitter. I don’t think any National League teams would be willing to trade for him because of his defensive misfortunes in left field.

    Except for the Giants who, you know, actually did try to trade for him last season, but Soriano declined it.

    Soriano is under contract with the Cubs for 2013 and 2014. He will make $18 million each of these last two years.

    Even a stupid person gets something right every once in awhile.

    Since he has such a short contract, an AL team doesn’t have too much liability if the pick him up for the short-term.

    $36 million in the AL apparently equals about $20 million National League dollars. For some reason. I don't know.

    Can't we just DFA Rant Sports already? That place is the largest collection of idiots that any non Bleacher Report site has ever seen.

    dmick89
    When I awoke, the Dire Wolf, six hundred pounds of sin, Was grinning at my window, all I said was "Come on in"
    dmick89
    dmick89
    Contact me here

    64 Responses to “Rant Sports writes stupid stuff on the internet again”

    1. Rice Cube 1 Rice Cube says:

      Why’d you click it? (dying laughing)

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    2. 2 Edwin says:

      Wow. I actually went to Rant Sports to see what all the fuss was about. I need to go home and lie down now. Ouch.

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    3. 3 Mobile WaLi says:

      Couldn’t this be an weekly daily hourly feature?

      Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

    4. Rice Cube 4 Rice Cube says:

      @ Mobile WaLi:
      I think OV would suffer brain damage being exposed to Rant Sports that often.

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    5. GBTS 5 GBTS says:

      Why in bloody christ would you let the secret out?

      (dying laughing)

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    6. GBTS 6 GBTS says:

      Go easy MB, it’s more likely than not this was written by a middle schooler.

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    7. dmick89 7 dmick89 says:

      @ Mobile WaLi:
      It would be a full time job.

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    8. Mish 8 Mish says:

      What’s with this AL-only DH meme regarding Soriano trades? A) I don’t think his defense is downright terrible, and metrics have been generally favorable to him. B) Do people realize some of the players who play in the corner OFs? A lot of teams hide players in the corner OF just to get their bat in the lineup. And regardless of this, if the sum total of Soriano’s offense and defense is better than who ever he’s bumping on the depth chart, does it really matter?

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    9. dmick89 9 dmick89 says:

      Mish wrote:

      What’s with this AL-only DH meme regarding Soriano trades? A) I don’t think his defense is downright terrible, and metrics have been generally favorable to him. B) Do people realize some of the players who play in the corner OFs? A lot of teams hide players in the corner OF just to get their bat in the lineup. And regardless of this, if the sum total of Soriano’s offense and defense is better than who ever he’s bumping on the depth chart, does it really matter? The Giants tried to trade for him.

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    10. Mish 10 Mish says:

      @ dmick89:
      (dying laughing) (dying laughing)

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    11. Suburban kid 11 Suburban kid says:

      (dying laughing) will those silly billies at Rant Sports ever learn? (dying laughing)

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    12. 12 Tim says:

      For another example why no one should ever read a Rant Sports article for actual news or insight:

      http://www.rantsports.com/mlb/2013/02/23/why-dont-the-chicago-cubs-spend-money-on-some-pitching/

      This is the worst sports article I’ve ever had the displeasure of reading. The author suggests the Cubs trade for Verlander, Strasburg, Kershaw, Dicky and Price. Apparently having 5 aces would be a superior rotation to what the Cubs have today. Thank you Rant Sports for that insight. Also thank you for considering the fact that such acquisitions are not in the realm of possibility since all of these players are under contract, by teams in contention, and the Cubs have nothing of equal value to offer in return.

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    13. dmick89 13 dmick89 says:

      @ Tim:
      Oh dear god.

      For my fourth spot, I need some left-handed pitching. Clayton Kershaw is an amazing young pitcher who would probably be chosen first by any GM if they were asked to build a team from scratch. Kershaw had an ERA of 2.53 in 2012.

      Kershaw is probably the best pitcher in baseball, but we’ll just get him as our 4th starter. (dying laughing) Unbelievable how stupid that is. If you have one Kershaw you’re doing damn well. This guy wants a team of them. Who wouldn’t?

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    14. dmick89 14 dmick89 says:

      Someone needs to find that guy’s twitter account and remind him once an hour he’s an idiot.

      Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

    15. Suburban kid 16 Suburban kid says:

      Alex Maestri is starting today’s elimination game for Italy. PR is also starting a career minor leaguer, so the Rizzmaster General might stand a change with his motley crew against Beltran, Pagan, Yadi, Aviles, Rios, etc.

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    16. GBTS 18 GBTS says:

      @ Tim:
      There is just no way that was written by someone over the age of 17.

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    17. GBTS 19 GBTS says:

      @ GW:
      Vogey in the top hundo.

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    18. 20 Mobile WaLi says:

      GBTS wrote:

      @ Tim:
      There is just no way that was written by someone over the age of 17.

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    19. dmick89 21 dmick89 says:

      GBTS wrote:

      @ Tim:
      There is just no way that was written by someone over the age of 7.

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    20. dmick89 22 dmick89 says:

      WaLi beat me to it. (dying laughing)

      Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

    21. 24 26.2cubfan says:

      @ GBTS:

      13. I teach 13yo kids, and every single one of them knows more about baseball than this idiot.

      Can we also point out the fact that VERY few AL teams have a true DH. Most of them just use it to give their weaker fielding starters a day off from the field. Looking at last year, the only guys who were basically full-time DH in the AL were Billy Butler (KC) and Delmon Young (who also had 29 starts in the field). Can we please dispel the myth that AL teams will sign or trade for guys with the intention of DHing them? Christ, even Adam Dunn plays the field for a good chunk of games.

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    22. uncle dave 25 uncle dave says:

      @ dmick89:
      Don’t come at Rant Sports, bro.

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    23. Aisle424 26 Aisle424 says:

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    24. GBTS 27 GBTS says:

      @ 26.2cubfan:
      So was Ortiz in BOS, when healthy.

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    25. mikeakaleroy 28 mikeakaleroy says:

      Cub loses again, in a very Cub way. Italy mostly forgot how to play baseball in the 8th.

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    26. josh 29 josh says:

      Rantsports : baseball commentary ::
      ehow : life advice

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    27. SVB 30 SVB says:

      Rant Sp**** (why keep repeating the name and helping the search engines?) reminds me of both episodes I’ve ever seen of Dr. Phil.

      We need a macro for RantSp. Maybe something like Those Dipshits.

      I know this may be blasphemy, but Bleacher Report is far better than Rant Sp. What Rant Sp has done is take the BR model of inane commentary, refine it to 99.99% inanity, and magnify it. BR still occasionally has an interesting phrase here or there.

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    28. SVB 31 SVB says:

      This thread = (dying laughing) (dying laughing) (dying laughing)

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    29. 32 Doogolas says:

      For my fifth and final spot, I would pick up David Price. In 2012 this lefty went 20-5 with an ERA of 2.56. Price is known for pounding the strike zone, especially with his first pitch. His outstanding control and pitching IQ would remind Cubs fans of Greg Maddux.

      Well, I mean, is no one going to point out this, probably the worst part. David Price’s control would remind fans of Greg Maddux?

      2.53BB/9 two years ago
      2.52BB/9 last year

      FIrst of all, literally every pitcher he named has better control except MAYBE Stras, but he’s coming off TJ, and control is usually the last thing to come back. His career BB/9 is still 2.40.

      And in case all of that isn’t enough, Maddux had a BB/9 that high in 1990 and before 1990. Literally every year after that in his career he didn’t touch that, and from 1994 to 2001 he had a full 1.00BB/9 less and multiple times was under half that mark.

      That article was awful on basically every level possible, but that was the shitcherry on top of the shit Sunday.

      I’m also deathly curious as to what makes Price such a smart pitcher. Why is he some cerebral powerhouse in the MLB and when did it happen?

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    30. WaLi 33 WaLi says:

      Doogolas wrote:

      but that was the shitcherry on top of the shit Sunday.

      Great, now I’m hungry.

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    31. Mish 34 Mish says:

      I’m surprised no one has dropped this yet:

      Rant Sports is the Joe Mather of Baseball blogs

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    32. JonKneeV 35 JonKneeV says:

      @ Mish:
      So Dale Sveum thinks Rant Sp is a great blog?

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    33. Suburban kid 36 Suburban kid says:

      @ JonKneeV:
      This comment somehow reminded me of Neifi Perez, and how he “saved” the 2005 Cubs according to Dusty. I then wondered what Neifi was doing now, so I performed a Google search. Wikipedia told me he is now 39 years old, but it had no info about his current whereabouts or whatabouts. Clicking back to the search results, I soon became bored, however, I learned that Neifi has his own entries on IMDB and urban dictionary.

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    34. 37 Edwin says:

      There is absolutely nothing that would cause David Price to remind me of Greg Maddux.

      But they do/did both throw baseballs, so I kind of see what he’s getting at.

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    35. mikeakaleroy 38 mikeakaleroy says:

      @ Suburban kid:
      He is #committed to hiding with Adrian Cardenas.

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    36. Berselius 39 Berselius says:

      @ Suburban kid:

      Given how Shawn Camp was last year’s MVP, I’m guessing Neifi’s been consulting him from the shadows.

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    37. dmick89 40 dmick89 says:

      @ Berselius:
      Who will be Sveum’s MVP in 2013? Early favorite has to be Shawn Camp and James Russell.

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    38. EnricoPallazzo 41 EnricoPallazzo says:

      haha this website is so full of awesomeness.

      http://www.rantsports.com/mlb/2013/03/14/baltimore-orioles-pitcher-brian-matusz-flirts-with-no-hitter-in-spring-training/

      from now on, i will be calling an official no-hitter after 4 innings.

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    39. EnricoPallazzo 42 EnricoPallazzo says:

      OK CALM DOWN YOU GUYS!!!! rant says that there’s no reason to panic.

      http://www.rantsports.com/mlb/2013/03/14/no-need-to-panic-over-chicago-cubs-7-11-cactus-league-record/

      turns out everything will be ok after all – apparently the spring training record doesn’t matter that much? who knew?

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    40. mikeakaleroy 43 mikeakaleroy says:

      @ EnricoPallazzo:
      I’m not going to post links here (and you should have your lifetime OV membership revoked for posting TWO articles), but never fear because apparently Ryne Sandberg is still going to be the next Cubs manager according to another one of their “articles”.

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    41. 44 Rice on bus says:

      The “stupid motherfuckers” tag gives me the giggles.

      Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

    42. EnricoPallazzo 45 EnricoPallazzo says:

      @ mikeakaleroy:
      wait are we not supposed to post links anymore or something?

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    43. 46 Mercurial Outfielder says:

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    44. JonKneeV 47 JonKneeV says:

      I’ve got swingman Carlos Villanueva for the Dale Sveum MVP Award.

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    45. mikeakaleroy 48 mikeakaleroy says:

      @ EnricoPallazzo:
      Just giving you shit for linking to the “stupid motherfuckers” (dying laughing)

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    46. dmick89 49 dmick89 says:

      @ Rice on bus:
      It’s used sparingly. That way you can more easily identify the stupid from the stupid motherfuckers.

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    47. dmick89 50 dmick89 says:

      @ JonKneeV:
      If I was going to actually bet money on something so silly, I’d probably go with him too.

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    48. dmick89 51 dmick89 says:

      I appreciate the Catholic Church not wasting days and days of news coverage for popapalozza, but I’d have preferred them to have elected a 20 year old. That way I could probably go the rest of my life without another popalection.

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    49. Myles 52 Myles says:

      I sent my resume in, but apparently I didn’t get the job. Something about not having a certain “zest for our children,” I don’t know.

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    50. dmick89 53 dmick89 says:

      @ Myles:
      That and not being Catholic (or Christian or religious) hurt my chances apparently. I thin it’s bullshit.

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    51. WaLi 54 WaLi says:

      dmick89 wrote:

      @ Myles:
      That and not being Catholic (or Christian or religious) hurt my chances apparently. I thin it’s bullshit.

      Do you think Christian Villanueva is jewish?

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    52. WaLi 55 WaLi says:

      @ WaLi:
      Well I guess not necessarily jewish, but anything but Christian. His parents kind of screwed him over as far as choosing a religion of his choice with that name.

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    53. 56 That one guy from Rant Sports says:

      Bunch a Jabronis in this thread

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    54. SVB 57 SVB says:

      @ WaLi:
      Are you kidding me?

      One of the most common spanish boys names is jesus. Christian is nothing-it becomes Cris. Jesus doesn’t become “Jeez” or Hey. Every Jesus I know uses their middle name.

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    55. 58 akabari says:

      Going back to near the beginning of the thread, I think its obvious Bush rod is am improvement. That site that listed Webb as better last year just shows how awful football metrics ate.
      That site listed Webb as one of the best a few years ago. Look where he got us. I think Bushrod was a damn fine signing.

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    56. josh 59 josh says:

      @ SVB:
      Every Jesus I Know Uses Their Middle Name is going to be the name of my new band.

      Thumb up 4 Thumb down 0

    57. Berselius 60 Berselius says:

      @ akabari:

      Packers UFA signings thus far:

      I’m liking this strategy

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    58. GW 61 GW says:

      @ akabari:

      It wasn’t a metric in the sense that it was derived from box score stats. More like a scouting report, really. I don’t have a problem with that, can be very informative.

      The conclusion was that Bushrod wasn’t much better last year. A commenter on the article made the great point, though. The Saints passed much more frequently than the Bears, increasing his degree of difficulty.

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    59. GW 62 GW says:

      @ SVB:

      Jesus in Hebrew is Yeshua which is Joshua in English.

      Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    60. mikeakaleroy 63 mikeakaleroy says:

      @ GW:
      So I guess Josh’s new band name should be “I am Jesus”

      Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

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