Bill Murray's Video Resume for the Cubs Open TV Broadcast Position

In Commentary And Analysis by aisle42429 Comments

There has been a lot of discussion on the intertubes in the last day about who can possibly replace Bob Brenly. Alvin has helpfully compiled a list of candidates from various sources and included his opinion of the probability that they are hired. You can go over to see his commentary if you want, but I'll just give you the list and his estimated likelihood of hiring:

Dave Campbell: 0%
Mark Grace: 0%
Todd Hollandsworth: 20%
Darrin Jackson: 20%
Eric Karros: 50%
Steve Lyons: 20%
Gary Matthews: 5%
Keith Moreland :0%
Steve Stone: 10%
Rick Sutcliffe: 30%
Kerry Wood: near 0%
So it seems that Alvin is 155% sure that someone from this list will be hired. And that is sad. Sad not only because Al is presumably a high school graduate without a basic grasp of math, but also because the best candidate isn't even on the list.  I don't know if he's even interested in it, but Tom Ricketts should do some recruiting. Of course, I refer to none other than:
 

Yes. Bill Fuckin' Murray. 

Something has to entertain us as the Cubs flail about on the field as all of their real talent plays out in Kane County next season.

I managed to find a clip of his work in 1987 when he filled in for Harry Caray after his stroke. You can't tell me this work isn't one billion times better than Todd Hollandsworth on his best day, so I submit this on behalf of Mr. Murray to the Cubs.

I don't think any further research or due diligence is even necessary. Hire. This. Man.

Note: This was not my original idea. I first saw it floated out on Twitter by @rightfieldsucks. However, I endorse this idea 100% and will do what I can to put the entire weight of the OV Corporation behind this effort. (Which pretty much just involves making this post. The OV Corporation needs more tax breaks so we can truly become job creators.)

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  1. Ron Jeremy

    WenningtonsGorillaCock wrote:

    Aisle424 wrote:

    Maybe they’ll have a booth like the one in Naked Gun with Goudy, Stockton, Allen, Palmer, McCarver and Dr. Joyce Brothers.

    Have you seen the size of the broadcast booth? If they’re gonna have that many broadcasters, they’ll need to eliminate the press box, the organist and most of the upper deck concession stand. Then again, those might all be seen as improvements

    I like the organ!

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  2. mobile SVB

    Did Dave Otto move on elsewhere? I thought Zonk’s hiring over Otto was seen as a surprise. And Randy Hundley? Finally fully retired (I hope).

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  3. Mercurial Outfielder

    Yanks have 4 runs in 3 games that A-Rod hasn’t played, and Eric Chavez is 0-for-16 with 8 K. It’s all coming together perfectly for Girardi— Jay Jaffe (@jay_jaffe) October 18, 2012

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  4. Author
    Aisle424

    Brenly ———> D-Backs officially official. Paired with Steve Berthiaume
    Wood ———> Not interested in TV job, per Kap

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  5. Mercurial Outfielder

    Via Man-O-Lantern:

    “I have no interest in the position. I will be at spring training with the Cubs and I will work for the organization but I have no interest in becoming a broadcaster,” Wood told me.

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  6. mb21

    I haven’t paid all that much attention to the A-Rod stuff here or elsewhere over the last several days. I actually don’t have all that much of a problem with what Girardi did. A-Rod was below average at the plate with no power at all when he returned from the broken wrist. These things tend to take a long time to heal so it is safe to say that A-Rod, who wasn’t even all that great before the injury, was probably at best a below average hitter entering the post-season and pretty bad against right handed pitchers. Using Ibanez against righties definitely didn’t make the team worse. Chavez vs lefties is a bit odd though. Overall though, the Yankees sucked this postseason and even great A-Rod from several years ago wouldn’t have done much to change that.

    Personally, i think those being upset at A-Rod are overreacting and those being upset at Girardi are doing the same thing.

    Just my 2 cents.

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  7. Mercurial Outfielder

    If it relies on defensive metrics, I’ve stopped trusting it. That said, I’m with Sheehan; all you can control is process. And there’s not a lot of reason to trust a process that tells you Chavez over A-Rod is a good decision. I don’t think Girardi should be forced or fired and I don’t think A-Rod would have changed the way this series has gone, with as badly as Cano and Granderson have slumped and with Jeter out, but benching some of your best players in a LCS is not a good call, and Girardi has to own that. He’s been really uneven this postseason, himself.

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  8. Rizzo the Rat

    @ mb21:
    Did Girardi mention the injury at all in his explanation of why he was benched? As far as I can tell, the only justification he gave was recent performance against right-hand pitching. And why did he start A-Rod against righties earlier in the series? What could he have possibly learned since then? It seems like panicking over a small sample size to me. It’s worth noting, as well, that A-Rod has actually fared slightly better against righties in his career. Even if you applied regression, he’s been around long enough that its pretty safe to say he has virtually no platoon split.

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  9. mb21

    @ Mercurial Outfielder:
    I disagree. The process, if that’s what we want to call it, says a healthy A-Rod is a .352 hitter vs righties and Chavez is a .341 hitter vs righties. We have very good reason to believe that A-Rod is not healthy. Broken wrists take a long time to heal (often a full year before a player sees his power return). But even if we ignore the injury entirely, we’re talking .02 runs per game and if SG tells me that Chavez can make that up defensively, I believe him.

    I’m not arguing it helps the team. I’m arguing that it doesn’t hurt the team vs RHP, which all of the Tigers rotation is.

    I don’t know what Sheehan said, but SG provided numbers (without defense and assuming health) that shows them to not be all that much different.

    MGL on it during the Baltimore series:

    With Ibanez, the Yankees score 4.819 rpg. With A-Rod they score 4.883, a difference in favor of A-Rod, of .064 runs or around .015 per PA for that spot in the order. .064 runs should be around .65% in WE. The sim says that the Yankees win 66.2% of the time with Ibanez and 66.9% with A-Rod.

    The sim uses my current projections for all players. I have Ibanez projected as -1.8 runs per 150 games (~640 PA) versus a RHP and A-Rod as 9.1 runs per 150 games versus a RHP. SO we really didn’t need a sim to get the same results, as the difference is 11 runs divided by 640, or .017 runs per PA, as compared to the sim’s .015. Of course, they are not necessarily going to face a RHP for the entire game.

    So it’s not that big a deal, between the RH starter for Baltimore and the fact that Yankee stadium favors LH hitters (which is included in the sim, by the way). If there is indeed anything that Girardi knows that we don’t know or A-Rod is not as healthy as my projections might “think” than benching him is no big deal.

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  10. mb21

    @ Rizzo the Rat:
    I don’t care what Girardi mentioned. I don’t expect these guys to give honest answers for what they’re doing. I don’t need that. I have no idea why Girardi did what he did and to be honest, I don’t care. I’m not saying Girardi is good at his job. Quite the opposite. The guy is a fucking clown and more than proved that in his one year in Miami. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s the worst manager in baseball. I’m just saying the decision is at the very least defensible, if not the correct decision.

    For all I know, the Yankees made this decision so that A-Rod would want to be traded. If so, they succeeded and if they can save a few bucks they’re probably better off for it.

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